Phong Nha – 25th & 26th April

Phong Nha – 25th & 26th April

Captain Caveman was off back in to the big cave on Thursday 25th April so he gave me some cash to last me the next 4 days. He gave me 3 million dong (£92.17) for emergency money and 1 million (£30.72) for me to spend. I already had 120,000VND (£3.69) so I added that into the funds and worked out a budget of 280,000VND (£8.82) per day, in Captain Caveman’s absence. We both cycled to Oxalis where he had a coffee and I just had water, and there we said goodbye.
I then decided I would do some writing at The Villa’s and have breakfast and lunch there. Here’s what I had and the prices, in Dong;
1 pot jasmine tea 50,000
1 french toast with banana 90,000
1 soda water 25,000
1 mushroom pasta 150,000
Total 315,000VND (£9.72)

I had a quick phonecall with Caroline who was hoping to come to Phong Nha to visit next month. As I was eating lunch, 4 young British lads came in to escape the midday sun, one of whom was shirtless. Brits abroad get everywhere and the staff were so embarrassed as it is not polite at all to be half naked in Vietnam, unless you’re at the beach or swimming.
I went to Phong Nha Vegan around 6pm where the chef fed me a Banh Canh which is a vegan soup with thicker rice noodles and lots of vegetables. It was delicious and very filling.
At 8.30pm, I cycled Bluey home, a hot mess, to quickly take a shower before a video call with my parents. Today had been hot but the forecast for tomorrow was looking to reach 40°C, with less than 50% humidity. It was a good job the homestay had good Aircon.
While I was there I also paid some of the money I owed to the agent looking after  Captain Caveman’s apartment for the balcony work and transferred some of the money, he’d sent to me, in to my Turkish account.

I was playing catch up on my blog writing on Friday 26th April, being away and having visitors had left me a little behind. In the morning, after catching up, I watched the rest of Baby Reindeer, which I’d enjoyed despite the disturbing content. After an incident with a cockroach in the bathroom, I decided to cycle down to The Villa’s for a fruit salad which comes with yoghurt and granola, for a late breakfast. I had a lemon juice without sugar and some fried spring rolls for lunch then a cup of tea. My bill came to 170,000VND (£5.22) which was reasonable and the AC was very welcomed.
Some bad news came from Turkey which, if true, was going to be a pain for me; residency renewals from 1st May were only going to be given to people who rent (like me) for 6 months. It would still cost the same as a year or two which were previously available. This meant that I would be spending more and having to be in Turkey to apply twice per year. They had also stopped any new residency applications for people who rent a property.
Phong Nha Vegan was so hot and very busy, there was a cooler which was set at 35°C to try to keep us less sweaty but it had reached 40°C and I was begging for mercy. My phone was overheating and stopped working so there were no photos either. After helping with some English translation from 6pm to 9.30pm without stopping for a minute, I was done. I didn’t have any food that night just a piece of corn on the cob and some herbal tea. This weekend was a Vietnamese holiday so I didn’t expect tomorrow to be less busy but maybe more Vietnamese in town.

Phong Nha – 23rd & 24th April

Phong Nha – 23rd & 24th April

Captain Caveman was busy on the morning of Tuesday 23rd April. He had another day off so he went to Oxalis first thing, was sorting out tips and then getting a haircut and shave. I went to join Amanda and Greg for their last breakfast in Phong Nha, at the Mountain House. Amanda’s banana and honey pancakes were so beautifully presented, I had a lovely fruit salad and Greg had a bowl of pho. They each got an extra fruit salad with yoghurt too. I was still feeling a bit delicate and wasn’t sure why, again.
I popped to The Villa’s after breakfast and had a jasmine tea with a matcha tea biscuit on the side and half a litre of water as it was a hot day. Captain Caveman, Tatas and I met back up again in the afternoon at Mountain House to say farewell to the Aussies as they headed to Dong Hoi airport. They would fly to Saigon and have a day there before their flight to Sydney. It was sad to see them go, especially knowing that they had really enjoyed their 4 months off and did not want to leave. 
By 6pm I was at Phong Nha Vegan chatting to the owner, Hoan, and eating fresh spring rolls. Captain Caveman had gone to join Hung at the Rice House for dinner where he was trying some new dishes. At around 8.45pm I cycled to The Villas for a glass of red wine and to meet Captain Caveman. I was meant to have a video call with Ma & Pa but by the time we got back to Highway 20 it was 10pm and I didn’t want to disturb the other guests as the walls were thin. Jeff was still around and Captain Caveman had to tell him to make himself scarce when I went in.


On Wednesday 24th April Captain Caveman had the day off but his briefing was at 6pm so we had a few things to get done. It was also weigh day and the 7th Dalyan Fat Club I had missed. Bizarrely, I had put 3cm on my bust, lost 1cm from my waist and put 1cm on my hips. I had no idea what my weight was.
We decided to eat breakfast at Highway 20 Homestay, where we were staying, to give it a try. The lovely Nga brought me hot water for me to make my own Yorkshire tea! I’d not had one for over 2 weeks so it was nice to enjoy one while our pho and omelette was being prepared. It cost 115,000VND (£3.53) for beef noodles for me, an omelette with bread and a black coffee for Captain Caveman.
In the morning, he sorted all the tips out, which took a while. As a treat for lunch, Captain Caveman took me to Ganesh, the Indian restaurant, where we shared onion bhajis, lamb Samosas, chicken tikka starter, saffron rice, takka dahl and a garlic naan bread. It was really delicious and we had some left to takeaway.
To meet the Turkish residency rules and to pay for our balcony woodwork, Captain Caveman transferred me the money and then I would pay our agent, in Turkish lira.
At 3.30pm I had a meeting with a book publisher about getting one or two of my ideas in to print. Claire was really helpful and I really liked her, I think she got my humour and we did have a laugh. Unfortunately, for what I wanted her to do for me to get to the finished, published and illustrated product, it was going to cost me money we didn’t have. I needed another way but I wasn’t sure that I had the skills to be able to self publish it – we would see.
That evening, when Captain Caveman was at Oxalis, I went to Phong Nha Vegan and tried a dish called Bun Tron. It is a cold dish made from rice noodles, ribbons of cucumber, mango and carrot, tofu, lettuce, herbs and peanuts topped with a fake fish sauce. I had it without any chillies. It was a very sweaty night and I had an incident with a cicada which wasn’t too pleasant. It flew at me and went down my top, got scared and clung on to my bra, so much so that the waitress had to come and get it off for me. Captain Caveman came to meet me after his briefing and he had a beer while he waited for me to be ready to go home. It was 9pm when we left the Vegan, it closes at 10pm, and went back to Highway 20 where Dollar barked at me, again.

Photo credit – farewell photos taken with Greg’s camera

Phong Nha – 22nd April

Phong Nha – 22nd April

Monday 22nd April was Amanda and Greg’s last full day in Phong Nha and Captain Caveman had a day off so I’d suggested we have a little outing. Our first job was to check out of the Phong Nha Homestay, which had been amazing and it was going to be hard to find somewhere as good for the price. We were moving to a more rustic homestay further out of town and had told Vinh, the owner, that we would be checking in after 4pm. Captain Caveman and I packed our bags and left them in reception, letting them know we would pick them up later. The car picked up the Aussies, then drove down to collect us and was costing just 400,000VND (£12.33) to have the car take 4 of us to the Pub with Cold Beer and then wait for us and bring us back again later. That was an absolute bargain however, it turned out the road was being repaired so the driver could only take us as far as the suspension bridge. We had to walk over it but both Amanda and I were scared of walking on the metal mesh surface which you can see the river below on. It was very hot but we were glad to get to the Pub with Cold Beer where we were welcomed by Nhat. We ordered the famous BBQ chicken, which is charged at 250,000VND (£7.71) per 1kg of the alive bird. There is an option for you to pick, catch and kill your own but we did the more practical option of having the owners do that part. We chose rice, morning glory and plenty of peanut sauce to go with our meal and then waited about an hour or so for it to cook. We were in no hurry as there are hammocks aplenty for lolling about in and a lovely pool for a refreshing swim. I noticed that they now offer to accommodate people who want to swim but not eat or drink for a fee of 50,000VND (£1.54). It’s still one of our all time favourites and we always love to see Nhat and her family as they are so lovely.
Instead of a cold beer, which I would normally have several of, I had a fresh coconut at 40,000VND (£1.23) and a litre of water at 25,000VND (77p). Multi came to join us but didn’t eat or drink any alcohol, he just had water and plenty of fags! By 12.45pm we were tucking in to a very tasty feast in a delightful place. Captain Caveman had several beers which are also 25,000VND (77p) each and are always very cold!

We left around 3pm and had to walk back over the scary bridge, where I proceeded to get my frock caught on the barrier rails and my hat nearly blew off. Greg had to unhook me and hold my dress from blowing on to the metal again. We dropped Captain Caveman off at Phong Nha Homestay on the way back to pick up bags and pay the bill. It was just 980,000VND (£30) for our 5 night stay, which was an absolute steal and I definitely wanted to stay there again.
I got dropped off at The Villas, where I had left Bluey, and I cycled on to Highway 20 Homestay. Captain Caveman drove his motorbike up and we were given the end triple room in the traditional wooden house. It was really lovely and had a bathroom lay out which meant the toilet didn’t get soaking wet when taking a shower (always a bonus).

That evening we had been invited to Mountain House for Amanda and Greg’s farewell dinner with the owners, Ai and Hoai. Tatas and a customer from Captain Caveman’s Son Doong trip were also invited. Ai had prepared a massive feast and An, her brother, was giving out the beers. He was shocked that I didn’t want a beer but Captain Caveman had  brought some Jameson’s whisky and I brought my boozy fruitcake. The meal was good and the Aussies were sad to be leaving, especially as they didn’t want to go back to their stressful life back in Australia.
Unfortunately, I had a bad stomach around 10.30pm and had to leave all of a sudden. Knowing that I wouldn’t shit myself on a bicycle I sped off back to the homestay but as I got within a few metres, 5 dogs came running out at me. A local man on a motorbike saw me and parked to help me get to the gate, which was closed. When I got in to Highway 20, their own dog (which I didn’t know they had) came running out at me and was going mental. Vinh came out and told me if I say her name she would be friendly but I wasn’t convinced but she calmed down a bit to let me pass. I made it to the bathroom in time, only to be sat on the toilet when I noticed I had company!
A massive huntsman spider was within touching distance and I don’t like spiders at the best of times. I had the quickest visit I could in a spider occupied khazi and then had a lay down in the AC until Captain Caveman returned. It was late when he got back, he’d helped polish off the whiskey and I hoped he’d come to the rescue with the spider situation. That was not to be, as he encouraged the spider over to the shower area and named him Jeff.

Phong Nha – 21st April

Phong Nha – 21st April

On Sunday 21st April Captain Caveman was due out of Son Doong but I’d already arranged to see Amanda and Greg in the afternoon. For a late breakfast I had another fruit salad with yoghurt and granola from Tree House and 2 litres of water to set me up for the heat.
I’d been in touch with Bich to check it would be ok for the 3 of us to go to The Villas for lunch and then use the pool. I’d already mentioned this to Amanda and Greg, saying that if we were eating and drinking plenty they wouldn’t mind. When I arrived they were sat outside looking like 2 kids ready for a trip to the swimming baths. I laughed and then said we could go inside to eat. I asked how Amanda was after eating pork which she’s allergic to and she wasn’t too bad, considering. I ordered a mango lassi and a pho ga, while the Aussies decided to have fried spring rolls for Greg and fresh veggie ones for Amanda.
The rest of the afternoon was spent in the pool, talking to Multi and his kids who were also there to drink and use the pool. I had a soda water with ice and lemon then Captain Caveman arrived back from the cave and in desperate need of a beer and pizza. This year the boss had banned all alcohol on tours so Captain Caveman is often a smidge thirsty when he gets out after 4 days underground. I had a couple of white wines which are 90,000VND (£2.76) each. I’d only been in the pool once and Captain Caveman didn’t have his swimmers or time for a dip as he got picked up at 5.30pm to go to Chay Lap, we said we’d meet him in town later.

As decided yesterday, the Aussies and I went to Lantern restaurant for our dinner. I was happy to give it a try and I decided to see how the veggie Vietnamese pancake was. Amanda decided to order the same and a portion of onion rings. Greg wanted to compare dishes he’d had before so went for fried spring rolls and a pork noodle dish. My food was good but, if I’m honest, I preferred the one from Phong Nha Vegan.
After his gala dinner, Captain Caveman met us at Tree House for drinks where we had the following;
1 water 10,000
1 coke 15,000
1 Huda beer 20,000
1 ginger tea 30,000
1 watermelon juice 35,000
1 Mango Lassi 45,000
1 Strongbow cider 50,000
1 Carrot, Orange & ginger juice 60,000
Total spent 265,000VND (£8.17).
We said our goodnights as Amanda and Greg rode their borrowed bicycles back to Mountain House. Tomorrow was their last full day and night in Phong Nha, so we had plans.

Phong Nha – 19th & 20th April

Phong Nha – 19th & 20th April

I had a very busy day on Friday 19th April, it was also the day that our new Turkey tenants were moving in to Captain Caveman’s apartment. Jamie was picking them up from the airport and had agreed to buy them a welcome pack. He got the essentials like milk, bread, wine and beer which came to 700 lira (£17) and I transferred him the money straight away. I picked up the 4.7kg of laundry from Oxalis and paid the 141,000VND (£4.35) for it. I cycled back to The Villas where I had a pho ga (chicken noodle soup) and 2 cups of tea for breakfast, costing 120,000VND (£3.70). I’d posted the blog on my Facebook, where I mentioned about Captain Caveman’s contract with Oxalis coming to an end and it had got a bit lively with messages and comments – some of which I couldn’t answer the questions, as I didn’t know.

I met the Aussies at Phong Nha Vegan after I’d been back to the hotel to drop off the laundry. They were excited to have booked Hai’s Eco Tour for tomorrow and had invited me but I didn’t have the money, or the stamina to walk through the jungle looking for wildlife in this heat. I politely declined and we each ordered some food at Phong Nha Vegan for our lunch; I ordered the mushroom La Lot for the 3 of us to share and some fresh spring rolls, Greg ordered fried spring rolls, braised eggplant and steamed rice, Amanda chose the Banh Xero (Vietnamese pancake). We randomly ended up with a crispy veggie ramen dish which turned out to be one of my new favourites. I drank kumquat tea, my fellow diners had smoothies and I paid 200,000VND (£6.16) for my share of the bill. After our fantastic vegan lunch, the Aussies cycled off to their homestay and I mine but arranged to meet up later for dinner at The Villas.

I was still not tempted to drink alcohol so I just had a pot of tea and a margarita pizza for my dinner. It came to 200,000VND (£6.16) again and it was very good. It wasn’t a late night and I arranged to meet Amanda and Greg after they got back from their adventure tomorrow.

I had quite an easy day on Saturday 20th April, with being too poor and lazy to go on the day trip which the Aussies were on. I caught up on my blog and generally tried to keep out of the heat. I set the hotel room’s AC to 27°C to keep cool and drank lots of water to stay hydrated. For breakfast I had a lovely fruit bowl with yoghurt and granola/nuts from Tree House, then carried on doing some editing in there with a fan on. For lunch I had a soda water and a chicken fried rice which was excellent (I forgot the photo). My total bill came to 180,000VND (£5.55) for breakfast, lunch and a drink.
That afternoon, I got a message from the Aussies to say they were at Bamboo cafe, having just come back from the tour. I went to meet them and I had a fresh coconut. They didn’t have transport so decided to go straight out for food, rather than go back to shower, and they wanted my recommendations. The requirements were quite straight forward; Amanda can not eat fish or pork as it makes her ill and she wanted to eat street food, Greg said he’d try anything but both agreed it had to be Vietnamese. With only a week left here before being back in Sydney there was no point eating western food. I have never had street food in Phong Nha so I suggested a few places including the banh xeo, snails, baby birds and small restaurants around the market. I wasn’t certain if they would use pork products in their food but if Amanda stuck to chicken, snails or prawns she should be fine. As we walked past the Winmart and towards the market I mentioned that the pork place is good, but obviously not for Amanda. Greg was keen to try it and Amanda asked me if they did any other dishes, they do a good veggie and tofu soup. So in we went and I ordered the pork, rice, morning glory and omelette plate for 60,000VND (£1.85), Greg chose the pork noodle soup and Amanda’s choice was a bit of a surprise. She loves Banh Mi which is a pork sandwich and she decided to chance it and have the pork filled baguette anyway. When the food came, we all ate every bite and it was so delicious and cheap. Our total bill came to 240,000VND (£7.40) with a soft drink each. We ended up going in to Lantern restaurant for drinks after and the Aussies decided that we would eat at Lantern tomorrow as they had lots of Vietnamese dishes on the menu that they fancied.

Phong Nha – 18th April

Phong Nha – 18th April

I was feeling partially human on Thursday 18th April and had decided I was never drinking again. Captain Caveman was off in to the big cave so we were up early, having had a good rest at our latest accommodation, Phong Nha Homestay. We had 2 big double beds and a small balcony, overlooking the mountains and some wriggly tin. The bathroom was small but very functional and the place was super clean.

We went to Oxalis for breakfast where I had an orange juice and a bacon sandwich as I was hungry after hardly eating yesterday. I said goodbye to Captain Caveman who would be back out on Sunday afternoon. Almost instantly, I had a bad stomach and had to cycle back to the hotel. Luckily, I’ve found you can’t shit yourself on a bicycle so I was ok while ever I rode Bluey but it was touch and go in the supermarket. I had to leave promptly after buying sugar free milk, 5 Grains savoury biscuits and more tissues (I was still suffering with that cold from Hanoi) at a total cost of 90,000VND (£2.77).
That afternoon, I had a wedding to go to and the heat could not have been much hotter if it tried. I spent a couple of hours resting and blogging before I had to go but I really didn’t relish the temperature and humidity out there. Tatas had also arranged for a car to take the Aussies and her over to Phong Nha Farmstay for a pool afternoon and I had agreed to meet them there for dinner after the wedding.

Chung offered to give me a lift to the wedding at 3.30pm from outside my accommodation and we went with Ca Chua from Lantern restaurant and Moon from Funny Monkeys. On arrival, we met with Pe Map and Giang and we formed a girls only table. Lan looked fantastic and I was surprised that she wasn’t sweating as much as I was! I also didn’t have a nice dress to wear as they were all in the laundry at Oxalis so I wore one that had a nice colour, orange!
I was determined I wouldn’t be eating at the wedding as the outside temperature is certainly not conducive to the safe keeping of the food usually offered. However, with me being the only white Western woman on a table of friendly Vietnamese women, most of them mothers, I was not going to be able to do that! I was given prawns, chicken, beef stew and sticky rice, I voluntarily took a bread roll but managed to avoid any chillies or mystery food. I generously counted it as 10 syns, half expecting it not to stay in that long. There was no beer at our table, only water and Super Horse, until Hoan arrived and did a cheers. Chung took one for the team and I left with Moon, shortly after Giang had left. Vietnamese weddings are exciting for the first few times of going but I was really struggling to cope with an outdoor wedding in a mild heat wave.

Moon very kindly dropped me off at Phong Nha Farmstay and I headed over to the pool, where Tatas and the Aussies were having a dip. We all chatted and caught up with all the goings on, before ordering some dinner. Greg had got so drunk on Raki in Istanbul with our friend, Murat, that he was also never drinking again, Amanda didn’t drink but Tatas had a G & T for happy hour and a beer with dinner. I stuck to soda water with my beef in bamboo, Greg ordered the Nem Lui, Amanda thé Tofu curry and I think Tatas had a salad. The food was great and we had a good night, getting the taxi back around 10pm. My meal and drink came to 235,000VND (£7.24) but at the Farmstay they add service and tax on to the total bill. I spent 400,000VND (£12.33), which I gave to Tatas for my share of the bill and my taxi ride back with them. It had been an expensive but fun day and Tatas was off in to a cave tomorrow for 4 days, leaving me and the Aussies to have some fun until they left on Tuesday.

Hanoi to Phong Nha – 17th April

Hanoi to Phong Nha – 17th April

I think it’s fair to say that Wednesday 17th April could definitely have gone better! I was in a real tangle and could not function when Captain Caveman’s alarm went off at 6am. Our flight from Noi Ba airport in Hanoi left at 8.55am and Captain Caveman had to take one for the team and get me to the airport in my completely incapable state! He had left Lizzy’s key card at our reception when she had gone home without it and this caused some confusion with the receptionist. Captain Caveman had completely done the right thing getting to the airport earlier and by 7.30am I was checked in and lolling on a seat trying not to be sick or collapse. I don’t even remember leaving the hotel, the taxi ride to the airport or going through security. How Captain Caveman was functioning I do not know and, if it wasn’t for him, I would not have made it to the flight. Looking back I was still drunk as I’d had less than 4 hours of sleep and the most alcohol I’d drank since I missed my flight in Rhodes. I slept through the flight and was glad to get in to the Oxalis car at Dong Hoi airport. I was not so thrilled to be in the back of the pick up service for a customer who was quite sociable. Luckily, Captain Caveman was dealing with all the questions. We got to Phong Nha before midday and dropped me off at Phong Nha Homestay where we were staying for a few nights. I was so happy that the early check in was available and I got straight in to bed, only then realising I was still wearing last night’s clothes.
Captain Caveman had his Oxalis briefing at 6pm and, quite frankly, I was so glad it wasn’t me who had to work tonight – I was broken. I’d eaten nothing all day so I managed a full fat coke and some crisps. It was weigh day, obviously I didn’t get weighed as I’d barely made it through the day before I knew what day it was. I took my measurements to find there was no change to my bust or hips and 1cm off my waist. I counted the syns for last week, including what I’d had last night (using photos) and Captain Caveman’s rather observant memory – it was the most I’d had in months at 323 syns.
I went to sleep not even checking any of my messages or getting in touch with Amanda and Greg who had come to see us in Phong Nha for a week on their way back to Australia.

Photo credit – Captain Caveman

Bangkok to Hanoi – 16th April

Bangkok to Hanoi – 16th April

While the Aussies (Amanda and Greg) had arrived in Vietnam already, Captain Caveman and I were leaving Bangkok on Tuesday 16th April. It had certainly been a very moist weekend despite our efforts to not participate fully in the water festivals of Songkran, the Thai new year. Our belongings were packed in a plastic bag within our rucksacks and we were getting an early Grab to Suvarnabhumi airport. By 8.15am we were at the airport for a 11.55am flight with a Grab driver who had no change. Captain Caveman had to go in to the airport to faff about changing a note while I waited outside. There was a 7-Eleven shop in the airport so we got ourselves a couple of ham and cheese toasties and some peanuts, Captain Caveman had a coffee. They weren’t expensive (but I didn’t keep the receipt) and tasted really delicious. We only had hand luggage and were already checked in so we went through to the gate early, even before it opened. Captain Caveman treated himself to a can of Heineken beer for 199 baht (£4.30) – the most expensive beer of the trip.
At the gate we were held up because all non-residents to Vietnam, including me, had to have their visa checked. We boarded the plane just after 11am and Captain Caveman gave me his aisle seat while he took the middle one. We got a tasty meal of chicken noodles on the flight to Hanoi and when we landed we took the 86 bus for a total of 90,000VND (£2.77) for both of us. 

From Hanoi airport to the train station the journey was just less than an hour and we were staying at a hotel within walking distance and very close to Puku.
Captain Caveman dropped me off there while he went to the bank/gold shop and I had a passion fruit and mint slushy drink, without sugar, for 85,000VND (£2.62). We love Puku and have been visiting for years, it’s open 24 hours a day, every day, and is in central Hanoi. It’s been ideal for when we have got off the overnight train early in the morning, the menu is vast too so there is always something suitable to eat and drink.
Our hotel was a small one above Fika Coffee shop, which we initially walked past. We checked in and dropped our bags off, Captain Caveman went straight back out to say hello to Lizzy, a friend of Josh’s and fellow caver, who was in Hanoi with her brother. I met Captain Caveman back at Puku and then we went over to meet Johan, we had planned for a civilised evening with nice food, as tomorrow we had an early flight.




Felix – Spanish fusion tapas was small and nicely decorated. The menu was pretty exciting and I know a meal with Johan is always going to be excellent as he has great taste in food, he particularly loves meat and cheese. We started with one bottle of Primitivo, an Italian red wine, between the 3 of us. The food was tapas style and Johan made some great recommendations. Here’s what we had with the prices in Vietnamese Dong;
3 crispy duck tacos 255,000
2 tuna carpaccio 315,000
1 smoked salmon 125,000
4.5 beef prata 428,000
1 brie with jam 189,000
1 grilled duck 199,000
1 pork banh mi 275,000
1 unagi with eggplant 125,000
400g suckling pig 415,000
2 bottles Primitivo wine 1,760,000
1 San Pellegrino water 90,000

Our total bill came to a whopping 4,772,544VND (£146.80) which included 8 – 10% Vat and a 5% obligatory service charge.
Johan and Captain Caveman had all the fish/seafood ones and I stuck to more of the meat tapas. Instead of a dessert, because none of us are sweet people, we finished with a tapas each of our favourites; I chose the beef prata which we asked for 3 individual bites rather than the 2 (so a one and a half portion), the boys chose crispy duck and a tuna carpaccio. The food was absolutely amazing and definitely the best food I’ve had in Vietnam so far. Having the second bottle of Primitivo was Johan’s idea, and I wasn’t sure it was a good one. At 8pm, we sensibly got the bill and shared the cost, at £50 a head we had enjoyed a fabulous feast and were very full.

To end the night we decided to join Johan in a cocktail at a bar that he knew, where we were just in time for the 2 for 1 happy hour cocktails. By 8.30pm we were doing cheers; Johan with a whiskey sour and us with a martini. As we had to leave about 6.30am tomorrow for the airport, it was obviously a mistake to have another round. Captain Caveman and I had sensibly chosen the same drink as each other so that we could just have the one, but that left Johan to drink a second whiskey sour alone. It was only 8.55pm and happy hour ended in 5 minutes so we ordered 2 more martinis, but Johan ordered another cocktail which looked like a pornstar martini. We met some fellow drinkers who had just missed the happy hour and we got chatting while finishing our final drink, as I was already feeling a little tiddly. Needless to say the night got quite out of hand as Captain Caveman and I had another 5 martinis! I remember walking Johan to his Grab taxi, as we were on a walking street, but then got temporarily lost on my way back. We met a nurse who was from America but turned out he had lived in Germany but was of Turkish parentage. I got excited thinking I could speak Turkish to him.
After Captain Caveman paid our bill, which I don’t remember the amount, we walked with our new nurse friend to Puku to meet up with Lizzy. I proceeded to order red wine and Lizzy had a bit of a to do with her brother who she had left in their hotel room but had brought the key card with her. We had a great time in a very full Puku where I finally made some Turkish speaking friends. They were cabin crew for Turkish airlines, and I was able to prattle on in their native language to my heart’s content. I ordered another red wine and it was gone 2am when we left Puku. Lizzy left her key card and I left my phone, Captain Caveman had to go back for both and luckily they were still there. As I got in bed fully clothed and absolutely hammered, I don’t remember falling asleep, packing or setting alarm for tomorrow’s morning flight to Dong Hoi.

Bangkok – 15th April

Bangkok – 15th April

Monday 15th April was our last day in Bangkok and we had a very relaxing day, after the excitement of last night. We didn’t bother with any breakfast but we were going to one of our favourite Taiwanese restaurants for lunch. I’d already contacted our friend, Des, who we met in Phong Nha and is now living in Bangkok. We were trying to arrange to meet up with him and I knew he had today off. Captain Caveman had not seen Des for quite a while and it had been a couple of years since I saw him in Dalyan when he came to visit for a month. Captain Caveman told me to find out where he lived and we would go over there tonight.
Our first stop of the day was to the Central Embassy shopping mall for our lunch. On the way, we spotted the Foreign Exchange shop, which had obviously been closed when we were looking for it yesterday. This time, Captain Caveman got a rate of 36.20 compared to the 33.71 at the airport, and changed $100, getting 3,620 baht.
We walked to Din Tai Fung and at first didn’t find it but I was sure it was at the end, where a figure was outside. We went back and it was there and it was already busy, despite it being early. I had a pot of Jasmine oolong tea which cost 199 baht (£4.30), Captain Caveman had 2 normal sized Chang beers which were 149 baht (£3.22) each. We ate pork dumplings, shrimp dumplings and gyoza which were all amazing. I love Din Tai Fung and I felt it was worth splashing out the 1,698 baht (£37.10) for the 2 of us.
Our next stop was to Uniqlo where I needed another pair of knickers because all mine were in the wash. I bought a pair the same as I’d had before for 190 baht (£4.11), which were more expensive than the ones I had bought in Rico, Hanoi. The shop assistant clearly thought I’d had an accident because I was only buying one pair of undies and I’d declined the plastic bag. 

View from Din Tai Fung, Central Embassy

Back at the Citi Resort apartment, we managed to get my new visa printed out, it took some doing as when I or Captain Caveman sent it by email, the receptionist couldn’t open the attachment. Eventually, I sent it on a personal message to her phone and she sent it to her work email. I still didn’t know if I needed the visa but it made sense to have it in case I didn’t go back to Turkey when I thought I would be. With Captain Caveman’s job coming to an end and me still not earning any money, we didn’t know if we could afford a flight back for me next month. The visa rules in Vietnam require that you be out of the country when you apply for a new one so this would be the only time I’d be able to get one. I was scheduled to house and pet sit in Rhodes for a month in June and the cheapest flights I could find were over £400 just from Saigon to Athens and with 2 stops, one in China.
We spent the afternoon at the pool where I did some blogging, Captain Caveman mainly played Bridge and only got in the pool once I’d got out.

That evening, we got dressed hoping that the water fights would have stopped by now, especially as I was on my last set of clothes. We took a Grab car to somewhere near to where Des lives in an effort to locate a bar or restaurant for him to meet us in. As it was still the New Year, quite a few people were still celebrating with the water and paste and we did not escape it. Luckily, we both had our phones in waterproof bags but we did need to find a 7-Eleven shop to buy a bottle of water (ironically) and some wet wipes to clean up. Captain Caveman’s face was covered in the paste and we were both soaking wet when we found a little cafe that was open.
Anis Bistro was right next to Des’s accommodation but he’d never been there. Most places were closed and this place closed at 9pm so we had to look sharp. We all ordered chicken dishes and shared garlic bread and rice. Only soft drinks, tea and coffee were available and Captain Caveman was going to get a beer from the shop but didn’t in the end. The food was really lovely and I don’t recall the total cost as I was too busy chatting. I do remember the garlic bread was 60 baht (£1.30) and the main dishes around 100 baht (£2.16) each so it was reasonable.
It was great to see Des who had been off the booze for almost a year now and was looking well. He walked us to the train and we said our goodbyes, he was off to the Philippines next so maybe we would meet there next time.
Our journey back to the apartment took ages on account of everyone who’d gone water fighting being on the trains. Queues were big and standing only on the way back. It was almost midnight when we got to bed and I hadn’t packed yet. Tomorrow we would be flying back to Hanoi for one night on our way back to Phong Nha.

Ayutthaya to Bangkok – 14th April

Ayutthaya to Bangkok – 14th April

When we woke up on Sunday 14th April, it was hot and sunny so Captain Caveman thought it would be better to make an early start. We needed to be in Bangkok tonight to meet his friends for a special event we had been invited to. Captain Caveman paid our hotel bill and ordered a Grab car to Ayutthaya train station and we were outside the Nature Home waiting to leave before 9am. I was still full of cold but definitely improving as I had one last photo opportunity with the Sphynx cats from Earthling Craft Cafe and Bar.
When we got to the train station it was fairly busy considering it was new year and Captain Caveman bought our tickets. Unfortunately, the train we wanted was not until 10.30am so we had a while to wait. The train station cafe was closed so we walked to a 7-Eleven Supermarket where we paid 90 Baht (£1.95) for 1 coffee, 1 water, a croissant and a pain au chocolat. This time we got the hot train from Ayutthaya to Bang Sue Junction on the 10.27 train, in Class 3 seating with a fan for an 80 minute journey it was 14 baht each (30p). Then we changed on to a better train, more like a tube with Aircon which I was grateful for, as it neared midday and was very hot.
When we got off the train we walked to the boat stop where we were hoping to get to our next accommodation, just a few stops down the canal. After waiting 5 minutes, Captain Caveman decided we could walk along the canal to Citi Resort, Sukhumvit 39, easily. I was less optimistic as my bag was heavy and the midday sun was blazing hot. Obviously, I was too moany for Captain Caveman who went on ahead as I nearly puked at the stench of the canal near some sewage pipes. It was probably only a 20 to 30 minute walk but I did get a blister and drank all of the water that we had before reaching our apartment. We never did see a boat but we managed to miss all of the people out squirting water which was good. 
When we arrived at Citi Resort, we were able to check in a little earlier which I was so glad about as I was a sweaty mess. Once inside our apartment, which I was very impressed with, we hung up our outfits for tonight to attempt to get the creases out.
At just after 2pm Captain Caveman went to the shop downstairs, Freshmart, and bought a loaf of bread, cheese slices, tomatoes, apples, crisps, tissues, throat sweets and water for 260 Baht (£5.63). It felt good to have an apartment with a kitchen and even better that Captain Caveman made me cheese and crisp sandwiches for my lunch. We weren’t sure what the arrangements were for dinner yet but Captain Caveman got a text from his friend to meet him at his hotel. Martin had asked us to meet him at the Park Hyatt hotel at 6pm and we were really looking forward to going with him to the SIAM Songkran music festival.

Captain Caveman wanted to walk from the Citi Resort to the Park Hyatt hotel to meet Martin at 6pm. I was not comfortable with walking through the streets of celebrating Thais wielding water filled weapons during the height of the Songkran weekend, in my nice frock. We got a Grab car and arrived at the Park Hyatt early and tried to find the currency exchange shop. The receptionist in the hotel told us it was on floor 2 of the mall but we couldn’t find it. We even looked on all the floors but would have to do without. Captain Caveman had some money and a Vietnamese bank card but we weren’t sure how much we might spend tonight, as it might get a bit lively. When we went to the reception to meet at 6pm as arranged, George and Paulina were there. They had come by motorbike and had got quite wet in the water fights on their way. Captain Caveman had already met George who was a film maker, he and his wife lived in Bangkok. We said our hellos and then went to find Martin and the others, including Dung (aka Seven from Phong Nha) and his wife, Huong. Martin texted George and Captain Caveman with his room number and told us to come up but the staff were not happy with that and asked us to wait until they had spoken with Martin to double check this permission. We waited a while and then we were escorted in to a lift with a member of staff wearing an earpiece. We were not taken to Martin’s room but shown in to a restaurant with a bar. The 4 of us sat down at a table for about 10 people with great views over the city. We were handed a menu and given sparkling water with ice and lemon which was frequently topped up. When I looked at the menu it was rather pricey and I wasn’t sure what to choose. Martin, Louis, Dung and Huong joined us and we all got introduced. It was the first time Martin and I had met and it was so nice that he said that he was happy to meet me and had heard about me from Captain Caveman. Dung was the only one of us prepared for the water festival and had his zipped up red waterproof jacket on – he had been through flood season in Phong Nha and was taking no chances during Songkran. After hugs all round, Martin said to order what we liked and that he was going to order some side dishes for the table along with his meal. There were 2 more seats and it appeared we were only waiting for one person, I think his name was Ed but I wasn’t certain. Captain Caveman and I ordered a glass of red wine each, Martin had a Moscow Mule and the rest tried the IPA beer. Captain Caveman and I ordered the cheapest steak on the menu at 1,950 Baht (£42.48) for 160g. The side dishes were around 320 Baht (£6.97) each and our glass of house wine was 560 Baht (£12.20) for a 175ml measure. A few of our fellow diners, including Martin, ordered the Penthouse Burger at 1,290 Baht (£28.10) and Martin also ordered a side of lobster, as you do.
We had a bit of a laugh while we were waiting for our food; Captain Caveman rudely took a group photo cutting Martin out of the picture and Dung asked if he could swap his cold bottle of IPA for a warm one. The staff were obviously used to dealing with the la-di-da types of clientele but this request really did set the cat amongst the pigeons, as the request was relayed back to a senior server. When the food came, I had high expectations – possibly too high. My steak, which I had chosen a red wine and thyme sauce to go with, was not the best I’ve ever had and wasn’t particularly hot. It was served alone with a roasted bulb of garlic and I had 1 roast potato, some asparagus, 2 carrots and a spoonful of mac n cheese from the shared sides. The sauce was tasty but slightly on the watery side, whereas Captain Caveman’s béarnaise sauce looked to have a much better consistency. I didn’t need to worry about going off the Slimming World plan too much either as the meal was not too naughty. I did think the prices were steep, even for a fancy pants place like the Park Hyatt hotel and those prices did not include the obligatory 10% service charge and the 7% tax. The wine was nice but I wasn’t cheeky enough to ask for a second one as this was all on Martin’s tab.
When we finished eating, Martin announced he would meet us all downstairs in 10 minutes where transport had been arranged to take us to the Siam Songkran Music Festival at the RCA Central Park in Bangkok.

We were escorted from the restaurant of the Park Hyatt Hotel to the lift on the evening of Sunday 14th April. Two men with badges asked if we were friends of Martin and introduced themselves. They said we were leaving in 15 minutes so to go to the hotel’s pick up and drop off area. Here, we got in to a limo with George and his wife, the others got into separate limos and there was a convoy, lead by the police and security to RCA Central Park, via the long way round. When we got to the venue we got explicit instructions that Martin would get out of his car first then we would all get out quickly and follow. We were taken to the back stage area and to some mobile cabins with a portaloo outside. Inside, there were lots of drinks and some snacks but I just had soda water, Captain Caveman had a beer. Martin tried to have a power nap and we got talking to his stage manager. It turned out he was from Sheffield so he and I had a bit of a trip down memory lane. Alec and I even had friends in common; Dean Cotton, who used to DJ at The Queen pub in Mosborough, Paul Deehan from The Office pub and now private chef, and Shaun Yard from Granville college. While we were rabbiting on, Martin tried to sleep but couldn’t, and then there was a light display using drones which was impressive. All of us had passes round our necks which we could use for anywhere once the show started but we had to be back on time for the ride back.
We were given the nod when it was time to go to the stage and we had to climb the scaffolding steps over the temporary bridge – we had to go fast. Once on stage, Martin and Alec sat on the floor behind the decks ready to start the set. The crowd went wild at the announcement of Martin Garrix as he started his show. Captain Caveman, me, Dung, Huong, George and Paulina were all stood on the stage behind Martin and it was amazing. The special effects of fire and water were sensational as we saw the crowd getting blasted with massive water jets. I was happy to remain on the dry stage and loved dancing to Martin’s performance. He was very good and the atmosphere was incredible. I really enjoyed dancing and knew quite a few of the numbers.
At the end of his set, Martin came off to shake hands with the next DJ, Julian Jordan, who had been stood next to us and was wearing sunglasses in the dark.
We had to scurry back over the makeshift bridge and down the steps to where the cars were waiting for us. The crowds of the audience were being held back as we quickly got in to the blacked-out vehicles in a different order to how we arrived. The drive back was shorter and once outside the Park Hyatt hotel, Martin invited us to the bar for a drink. I was the first of our group to give him a hug and congratulate him on such an amazing show. He was ultra sweaty and I joked I would never wash again now! We all got in the lift to go to the bar and Captain Caveman took a group photo. In the bar we ordered drinks and I was impressed that the waiting staff remembered that Dung preferred a warm beer and brought that out for him. Martin had a Moscow Mule, Captain Caveman and I stuck to beer and we all sat together. Martin looked tired, and I wasn’t surprised given the amount of dancing about he did in jeans and a black t-shirt in the heat. Martin sat between us and got out his laptop to show us a sample of a new song he was working on. He is such a nice, polite, friendly and down to earth guy. I could see his passion and dedication as he got excited about the guitar chords sample he had.
After only a short time, it was time for him to retire to his room. They had an early flight tomorrow as Martin was playing in Tokyo. We had a group photo and big hugs all round, tonight had easily been one of the most memorable I’d experienced and I wouldn’t forget it.
We got a Grab back to the hotel and Captain Caveman told me he had messaged my friend, Ingrid, who is a Martin Garrix fan, with a photo. My phone was in a waterproof bag in my handbag and I had not took it with me on to the stage. I thought that was nice of him and then I sent a message to her once I got in to the apartment. Tomorrow we had one more day in Bangkok and still had another friend to catch up with.

Drone show
Drone show

Photo and video credit – Captain Caveman

The atmosphere was amazing
So much water going in to the crowd
Fire 🔥
Even the train
It was incredible
The audience were loving it
It was great being on the stage
All the lights on people’s phones
Such a memorable night
Sawadee Pee Mai, which means Happy New Year in Thai!

Ayutthaya – 13th April

Ayutthaya – 13th April

Captain Caveman and I were up early on Saturday 13th April and it looked to be a hot and sunny day in Ayutthaya, Thailand. After some research, a plan had been made by Captain Caveman to visit Jaeb Tom Leud Moo, a local Thai breakfast restaurant. It was famous for its blood and entrails soup but (luckily) it was also good for dumplings. It was already busy when we arrived but we found one available table at the back. We ordered various pork, prawn (or both pork and prawn) dumplings with soy sauce, a big bottle of water, an iced coffee and a hot tea.  The dumplings were only 25 baht (54p) for a dish of 2 or 3 so we ordered 3 lots initially. We loved them so ordered the same again. When the drinks came, they both had ice in and so much sugar I couldn’t tell which was tea or coffee. Captain Caveman drank both as the least offensive of the 2 drinks was full of condensed milk which I can’t stomach. We paid just over 200 baht (£4.33) for our feast and we were ready to explore the old temples of Ayutthaya.

We walked around and I tried my very best not to moan about how hot and sweaty I was but it was about 39°C by lunchtime. We’d walked round the old temple grounds, seen some elephants where people were riding them. I hate seeing tourists ride the elephants as it’s not good for them and they are probably not looked after very well. Previously, the thought of being sprayed with water in the street to celebrate the Thai new year had not been appealing to me, whereas now I could walk fully clothed in to a cold shower just to cool down.

As we approached a cafe there was a member of staff at Boran Cafe, dressed up and armed with a water gun. Captain Caveman went past without even a squirt but I lingered a bit and got my torso wet!
The cafe was very nice and was probably not the cheapest place in town but it was clean and had friendly staff. Here’s what we had for lunch with the prices in Baht;

Boran Cafe
1 soda water 25
1 steamed rice 25
1 duck curry 150
Prawn Pad Thai 190
Crispy Wontons 220
3 Leo beers 240
Total spent 850 Baht (£18.44)

The food was fantastic and made me feel better, as I continued with the cold and cough. I did have one of the Leo beers just to try it and at 80 Baht (£1.74) it was good but I didn’t finish it all. The staff asked if they could put a paste on our faces which is one of the oldest of the Songkran rituals. They mixed a white powder of limestone in to a pasty substance in a bowl and got us to shove our fingers in it then smear it on each others faces as a sign of protection to ward off evil. We looked very fetching as we made our way ‘home’ trying to avoid getting too wet.




Back at Nature Home hotel, Captain Caveman went to the room to play Bridge on his phone while I went to find the pool. There was a nice small, but deep enough, pool and I chatted to a Thai guest who was there and then the owner.
When Captain Caveman came down to the pool we decided to miss going to the 3.30pm water festival nearby. We bought a couple of large Chang beers for 90 Baht (£1.95) each and shared the first one while the owner stuck the second one in the freezer. It was a lovely hotel and I’d definitely stay there again if I went back to Ayutthaya.

That evening was the Thai new year’s eve and we had planned to go to the local night market which was famous for having lots of food stalls. While we were in the room getting our showers, an almighty storm started and we were going nowhere until it finished. When it did eventually stop we went out to find there were some casualties; a tree had been struck by lightening and had fallen across overhead cables on to the metal gate of a property. A group of people congregated outside and it looked like no-one was brave enough to touch anything for fear of electrocution. We found the night market but there were not many stalls that were functioning, much of it was in darkness and the vendors burned candle wax to give them some light. I decided I wouldn’t be eating from the stalls, my stomach can’t cope at the best of times, and I was concerned we couldn’t see if items were cooked or what they were. I encouraged Captain Caveman to try some food but he didn’t look keen either and we had a big day planned tomorrow. Instead, we walked the streets trying not to get soaked with water from all the Thais out on the street having water fights, or people with super-soakers and buckets in the back of pick up trucks. I was doing so well until we turned a corner and a guy with a small container threw it at me, it was quite nice in the heat. It wasn’t so nice when the next guy along tipped a bucketful on us both!
We walked, sopping wet, and a bit cheesed off that we wouldn’t get our clothes dry before travel tomorrow. At least we had both put our phones and stuff in my bag inside a plastic bag to protect them from getting soaked. I even had my tissues and Hall’s mentholyptus sweets in to a plastic bag too.
We had trouble finding somewhere open where we could get an evening meal and were about to give up and go back to the hotel when we came across a white building called Walk In Cafe and it also had a sign saying Grandma’s House. We walked in to the cafe which was freezing due to us being wet and the AC being on. I was starving and so we ordered some dishes to share and extra pork. I was tempted to order the cheese toast as the menu made it look amazing but the Thai dishes were better value and a bit more diet friendly. All our food was amazingly tasty and I really enjoyed it but I didn’t take any photos of it. Here’s what we had and the prices in Baht;

Walk In Cafe
1 soda water 15
1 Leo beer 90
Chicken Pad Thai 100
Chicken & Cashew nuts 100
2 crispy pork 300
Total spent 605 Baht (£13.13)

The place started to close just as we finished eating and we walked home. It was dark and we noticed the property with the fallen tree was still dealing with it. Back at the hotel, we hung our soggy clothes out to try to dry them as much as we could before we had to leave tomorrow. Captain Caveman was still in two minds whether to leave on the early train or check out at 12 and then get the train. We had plans to meet his friend for a bit of a special Thai New Year celebration.

Photo credit – some photos taken by Captain Caveman

Hanoi to Ayutthaya – 12th April

Hanoi to Ayutthaya – 12th April

I’ve had some unusual Fridays in my life but Friday 12th April certainly fell in to that category. We got up and packed our bags ready for an exciting break to Thailand, I was feeling a bit better but still had a cold and a cough. We walked to Saint Honore bakery to get some breakfast to take to the airport. They were building outside so it wasn’t easy to get in and we ended up just getting a croissant. By 10.30am we had exited Vietnam at Hanoi airport so that I could send a photo of my passport stamp to Lynn Visa. She was going to apply for another visa for me while I was out of the country and, hopefully, send me the new one on Tuesday before our lunchtime flight back. Captain Caveman had organised a weekend in Bangkok for us and we were going to be meeting up with one of his Son Doong customers. Thailand was celebrating Songkran this weekend so there would be lots of water festivals everywhere. Our Vietnam Airlines flight from Hanoi to Bangkok left at 12.45pm and we got seats sat together, me in my preferred aisle seat. We boarded 30 minutes late but still departed on time. On the flight we got a really nice meal which included; a banana, a beef noodle dish and some bread – even the hot tea with milk wasn’t bad. On landing, Captain Caveman had to change $200 at a fairly low rate and got 6,742 Thai baht. Even though money was still a concern to me, Captain Caveman had put money aside for this holiday and said not to worry.
We were not staying in Bangkok for the next 2 nights, Captain Caveman had booked us in to a small hotel in Ayutthaya, the old capital. The journey there was not for the inexperienced traveller as we had to ask a member of staff at Bangkok airport train station how to get there. He told Captain Caveman it was off the edge of the map, but, luckily, he was well versed with the London Underground map and it wasn’t dissimilar. The train was a bit of an eye-opener and we only just made it on to it in time. Somehow we had managed to get from Bangkok airport to Bang Sue Junction, buy a 14 baht (30p) ticket each, for a 90 minute journey and grab a seat. The train was not unlike one I’d been on in India, it was insanely hot and fairly busy and I found it difficult to cope. I moved seats several times to try to get near a fan, while Captain Caveman played Bridge on his phone for the duration of the ride. At 6.23pm I had never been so ready to alight the train, an absolutely dripping mess of sweat. The train station at Ayutthaya was nice and Captain Caveman managed to get a Grab taxi without any issue. When we arrived at Nature Home, our accommodation for the next 2 nights, the owner showed us to our room. He proceeded to educate Captain Caveman on how to work an Air Con remote, how to open and close windows and how it was very hot here for English people. That went down well and I could tell Captain Caveman had stopped listening.
At 6.55pm I unexpectedly received a message from Lynn Visa, who had already got my new Vietnamese visa for me. I checked it, it was correct, and thanked her for such a quick service – well worth the $80 (£64). This meant that I was permitted to stay in Vietnam for another 90 days should I need to.
That evening we needed to get some laundry so we spent our Friday night between Happy Mix Wash & Dry launderette and Earthling Craft Cafe & Bar. An usual day turned strange when I realised that the Earthling Craft Cafe & Bar had spiders, reptiles and sphynx cats. Luckily they also had good ales, a delightful cider and excellent food. Happy Mix was amazing and we managed to do a load of laundry for an acceptable 105 baht (£2.28) and this included tumble drying as well. Captain Caveman and I took it in turns to check on the cycles as it was just across the road and had free WiFi.
Our garlic bread and pizza at Earthling was very good and I don’t recall the prices as Captain Caveman paid but I know it was reasonable. Back at the Nature Home hotel, I didn’t take long to fall asleep which was good as we had a busy day tomorrow.

Hanoi – 11th April

Hanoi – 11th April

Thursday 11th April was one of our most extravagant and expensive days of the year so far. I was still feeling really poorly when I woke up so Captain Caveman went alone to meet friends for a Bun Cha breakfast. He also had a walk to the famous Hanoi train street but didn’t take any photos as he’s been before. I got up to a lovely surprise when I needed my morning pee; a blocked toilet with a real treat from my other half! I could’ve cried but, instead, I got dressed, cleaned my teeth and walked to Oriberry cafe to use the loo and have breakfast. I had a hot winter tea to help sooth my throat and cough along with turmeric and ginger cookies.
Captain Caveman came to meet me and we had words about the toilet situation and I paid my bill of 110,000VND (£3.45). I also transferred our Turkish letting agent the money for her cut of the rent paid, a deep clean of Captain Caveman’s apartment and a replacement front door lock. The lock came as a surprise as there was nothing wrong with it when I left a month ago, but now it was broken! The only people who had been in were the workmen for the repair and replacement of the balcony railings, which we still needed to be finished by next week and were going to cost 55,000 Turkish lira (£1,358). Captain Caveman was aware of these costs and had been saving up before finding out about his job but, still, it was all pay out.
I was hungry so Captain Caveman decided to treat me to a nice lunch at Hanoi Taco Bar which looked out on to West Lake. We both ordered the lunchtime special, him with tacos and me with enchiladas. It was very tasty and for only 350,000VND (£10.98) for the both of us with a drink, it was worth it.
I was still very snotty but we decided to go to Republic for a drink overlooking the lake. To try to get some iron in me, I plumped for a Guinness and Captain Caveman had an Espresso Martini. Next, I decided to top up my calcium levels with a White Russian while Captain Caveman had 2 pints of Sapporo. Our bill for the 5 drinks came to 560,000VND (£17.57) which I didn’t think was bad for a fancy bar in Hanoi.
We walked back to Aisha hotel where I tried to make Captain Caveman deal with telling the staff about the toilet blockage. He said the cleaner would have been and sorted it out by now, but he was wrong. The cleaner was in another room so I went to get her and hoped Captain Caveman would speak to her. He laid on the bed on his phone and ignored the whole thing while she obviously thought it was my blockage. I couldn’t cope with it without heaving so, as she shoved her hand in to a plastic bag and then down the toilet, I went downstairs to sit in reception. When the lady finished she came downstairs and gave me 2 bottles of water, obviously thinking I was ill. I was so embarrassed and when I got back to the room, Captain Caveman had not moved or spoken to the woman! I was not pleased, at all!




Captain Caveman had arranged for us to meet up with Johan at a fancy restaurant in Dang Thai Mai, Tay Ho (West Lake) in the evening. On the way, we called for a cheeky drink at The Bottle Shop, I just had a soda as I was still not well but was getting better.
At Los Fuegos, where Johan was a regular, we indulged in the most amazing meal I’d had so far in Vietnam. No expense was spared as we tasted so many different dishes and it was Captain Caveman’s holiday, after all. I really ẹnjoyed 2 of the dishes which I thought I’d replicate once I was back in Turkey; the water melon & feta skewers and the dates with goats cheese – both were simple but amazing! Johan chose the wine which was a vintage Pinotage/Syrah at 840,000VND (£26.35) per bottle. Here’s what the 3 of us ordered and shared for our dinner, prices in Dong;

Black garlic sauce 60,000
Grilled Brussel sprouts 80,000
Watermelon & feta 125,000
Cheese 135,000
Bone Marrow 220,000
3 bottles of sparkling water 420,000
Rump steak 490,000
Skirt steak 730,000
3 bottles of red wine 2,520,000
Churros 100,000
Dates with Goats cheese 140,000
Total (Inc tax & tip) 5,020,000VND (£157.60)

It was worth the just over £52 each, which included a bottle of wine and a bottle of San Pellegrino water each, but I did feel a bit out of sorts for spending almost a week’s budget on one meal. It definitely made up for the shitty toilet incident earlier, though. Los Fuegos closed at 10pm so, after a quick photo with a Maradona painting, we were back to The Bottle Shop for one last drink. We said goodbye to Johan with a loose arrangement to meet up on our return to Hanoi.
Back in the hotel by 11.30pm, Captain Caveman fell asleep instantly on top of the covers, in just his pants. I stayed awake coughing for quite some time, hoping to be better for tomorrow’s 12.45pm flight.

Hanoi – 10th April

Hanoi – 10th April

I slept in until pretty late on Wednesday 10th April and my cold had got a lot worse. Captain Caveman and I walked to the nearest shoping centre for breakfast and he had coffee and a cheese and ham toastie. He bought me a croissant and an earl grey tea but I could hardly taste it and kept coughing a lot. I was running out of underwear so we went to Rico where I bought 2 pairs of sensible knickers for 200,000VND (£6.38) and Captain Caveman thought it was a bit of an unnecessary expense. I rarely spend any money on clothes and when I do it’s always for practical reasons, but these were essential. I’d had my eye on one of the cute dresses they had for 400,000VND (£12.31) to take on our trip to Thailand but I was too sick and the budget didn’t include clothes to make me look pretty. On the way back to Aisha hotel we called a the shop for more essentials, here’s what we got and the prices in Dong;

Winmart Supermarket
1.5l water 10,600
Revive isotonic drink 11,800
Lays crisps 12,100
Japanese Crisps 19,000
Fridge cost 500
Total spent 54,000VND (£1.69)

Once back, I decided I needed to get back in bed and Captain Caveman was going to meet a friend for lunch, without me, but bring me something back to eat. As it was weigh day, and the 5th Fat Club in Dalyan that I’d been away for, I did my measurements. We had no scales but I’d put 1cm on my bust and waist, my hips had remained the same – maybe I didn’t need clothes in a smaller size if I was going to fill my baggy clothes again!
When Captain Caveman returned from a nice lunch at a yoga retreat with Cuc, he had brought me back a beautifully presented takeaway box. He told me they were fresh veggie spring rolls with a pesto dip. I bit in to one and it was super slimy and I had to spit it out. Unfortunately, he had brought me avocado rolls with some guacamole dip and had forgotten I hate avocado. Instead I ate crisps but I was still hungry.
That evening we were meeting our friend and Vietnamese teacher, Lien, for dinner but she had to rearrange plans and we met at Oriberry cafe. They do food but there was nothing I liked on the menu so I had a herbal tea and a slice of banana bread which Captain Caveman had half of and it was more like cake. It was only a brief meet up with Lien but it was good to see her, she looked really well. Captain Caveman decided we were going to go to an old favourite, Dalcheeni Indian restaurant, for dinner but Lien didn’t want to join us. I was a snotty mess and took ages to decide what to order. My eyes were streaming so I could hardly see the menu. I wasn’t having a good day where food was concerned as the samosas and my chicken tikka were too spicy so I ate the rice, naan bread and some of Captain Caveman’s chicken starter. Luckily Captain Caveman was able to eat what I had ordered without any complaints.
We walked back to the hotel, via the same shop where we bought the following;

Winmart Supermarket
1.5l water 10,600
Tissues 30,500
Total spent 41,100VND (£1.29)

Strangely, there was no extra cost for drinks from the fridge this time. Back at the hotel, I took some medication and went to sleep, hoping to feel better in the morning.

Dong Hoi to Hanoi – 9th April

Dong Hoi to Hanoi – 9th April

Captain Caveman and I were tucking in to Bo Ne at Mr Bull’s in Dong Hoi before 8am on Tuesday 9th April. Our flight from Dong Hoi to Hanoi was at 10.50am, meaning we would arrive in to the capital city just before midday. I was a bit cranky in Dong Hoi airport, as I had ordered what I thought was an oolong tea but it turned out to be a bottled sweet tea with tons of sugar. Captain Caveman often goes in to complete shutdown in an airport and doesn’t respond to being spoken to, he is so used to travelling alone that he spends the entire time on his phone and I find it rude. The flight was as expected and we arrived on time with plans to get the number 86 bus to Xuan Dieu to meet an old friend. Captain Caveman had arranged to meet Leonard, who used to live in Phong Nha, at a nice little Italian restaurant of Leonard’s choosing. We were meant to be meeting at Giovanni’s between 12.30 and 1pm but, unfortunately, there was a bit of a delay with our bus. There were quite a few pushy men at the bus station, asking where we were going and probably trying to get us to take an illegal taxi. Captain Caveman was having none of it and we both kept our wits about us as we saw what looked like a bit of scamming. We got on the bus and paid the 90,000VND (£2.84) for the pair of us to go to Xuan Dieu. We sat a while and then we were asked to get on another bus, which was further delayed and meant that Leonard was waiting a long time for us. We didn’t get going until 12.46pm and it meant we had about 15 minutes before the Giovanni’s kitchen closed at 2pm, once we arrived. We said hello to Leonard who was looking very well and was dining on a pesto pasta dish which Captain Caveman also ordered and I went for the tomato version. It was very tasty but I had started to feel a bit under the weather and had a bit of a cough. I put it down to the pollution as we walked Leonard back to his nearby apartment and said our goodbyes.

We walked, with our bags, to the Aisha Hotel where we were staying for 3 nights. It was very nice and it had a super comfy bed and no windows – ideal for getting to sleep in at last! There was no rest to be had though as we needed to get ready for the evening’s entertainment and, quite frankly, Captain Caveman had excelled himself with what he had up his sleeve!





Captain Caveman and I had been invited by his friends, Martin and Martina, to an evening event at the Czech Embassy in Hanoi. We arrived to a champagne reception and I was glad I had worn one of my new dresses, a black floor length number. There was a fundraiser for Blue Dragon where the founder, Do Duy Vi, was there to receive donations from an auction. The designer Mimi Lan Nguyen put on a fashion show which incorporated Vietnamese silk with Czech linen to raise money for the charity. Hynek Kmoníček, the Czech ambassador, was there to introduce it all and was quite an amusing speaker. Vi and Mimi were great and their stories were particularly moving, especially Vi who had grown up in poverty himself. There were stalls dotted around the outside of the building, my favourite being the Belgian chocolate one. We got to taste amazing chocolates by chocolatier Peter Rudolf Braun and it was so good.
After the show there was a chance to mingle with the likes of the Finnish ambassador and his wife, both wearing big shiny rings. A buffet of fancy canapes was put on and I had 3 with a glass of red wine. Captain Caveman managed to snaffle down a considerable amount more than me but was still up for food and drink elsewhere later. I’d really enjoyed my evening of Vietnamese and Czech culture a lot more than I thought I would – definitely another first for me.

We left Martin and Martina to ‘finish their duties’ as they work at the embassy and we headed over to 7 Bridges where we arranged to meet back up with them. Here I drank cider as I was still trying to stay off the beer while Captain Caveman tried a couple of different IPAs. We also had some food, I had quesadillas and Captain Caveman had sausage. When Martin and Martina rejoined us we each had a slice of pizza too. It had been a great night, something a little different. Around 11pm we paid half each of our 1,580,000VND (£49.38) bill which consisted of 6 beers, 1 cider, 1 soft drink, 1 quesadilla, 1 sausage, and 4 slices of pizza. I was definitely glad of my bed that night and had a bit of a sore throat as I went to sleep.