Dalyan – 8th January

It was my last full day and night at Bill and Jaxx’s villa on Monday 8th January. On our walks today, Big Boy had decided he wanted to go after a cat and I only just managed to keep him from zooming off. He wouldn’t listen and he got a little telling off for nearly pulling me over. To say sorry he licked me on the nose while I was trying to tell him the rules.
The dogs had sofa snoozes while I drank tea, ate an apple and then some noodles for breakfast. I was meant to be back on the healthy wagon but I indulged in fruit cake and cheese instead of lunch.
The Turkish lira was now over 38 to the pound, the highest it had been and was not good news for the Turks.
At 11.40am Captain Caveman and I had a video call and he seemed to be missing me. He suggested I send him photos for my Vietnamese visa and he would apply for it for me. That way he could pay for it as I didn’t know exactly when I’d get paid. Ordinarily, I would’ve been working today, as I do on Mondays, but it was on hold until after I received my wages, next week.

I fed Big Boy and Lucy early so that I could get the bus in to town for my parents’ farewell evening. I was looking forward to going out for a nice meal and spending some time with Ma & Pa before they went back to the UK, especially as I wouldn’t be seeing them for 6 months. I was still not 100% better and the cough was pretty bad so I wasn’t thrilled that we were meeting at Tez bar at 6pm – I find it too smokey even though I would be sat outside. My parents, understandably, had lots of friends who also wanted to see them off, as well as it being Adam and Kath’s leaving drinks too. The 4 of them were travelling to the airport together and had become firm friends. They had given the ball a right kick last night, getting on the gins after everyone had left – I can no longer keep up with them all. When we got to Tez bar it was very busy so I sat between my mom and Daisy. It was smokey and I nursed my white wine for ages as it was making my cough worse. When my mom went to the toilet, John took her seat so I wasn’t even sat near my parents and would’ve been better off meeting them at the restaurant. After 2 hours at a smokey Tez, I’d had enough, I think Ma and Pa would’ve stayed there if I hadn’t have insisted on us having a farewell meal. I should’ve learned after Captain Caveman’s leaving drinks, that perhaps not everyone wants a farewell meal!

When we got to Simple at 8.15pm, we only had 45 minutes before closing so I hoped it would still be ok. Onur greeted us and was fine about the time and I was relieved because I was famished.
We all had the red pepper and sun-dried tomato soup for starters and it was amazing. It was 100 lira (£2.62) per bowl but well worth it. For mains my parents had the Asian style noodles and I was tempted, but after having the burger last time, I couldn’t resist. They had sold out of the pulled beef burger, with us being so late, but the cheeseburger and fries that I had was still fantastic. The chicken noodles were 180 lira (£4.72), beef noodles 210 lira (£5.51) and my burger was 250 lira (£6.56) which we all agreed was value for money. Simple is not licenced for alcohol so we got a bottle of wine from Nazo’s, next door, which was 450 lira (£11.81) for a decent bottle of chilled white. I thoroughly enjoyed our ‘last supper’ and I was going to miss my parents a lot. They’d had such a great 3 months in Dalyan that I did worry that they would be going back to a more sedate, somewhat boring and more expensive life back in Sheffield.
After Simple, we decided to have a drink in Ozzy’s, the new bar which had replaced 2 Charlie’s. John, Andrea, Daisy and the Aussies were in there and apparently had been shouting us as we walked past but we’d ignored them – I hadn’t noticed.
It was very smokey inside which set my cough off straight away and I had to go outside and use my inhaler. Ma and Pa were fine and stayed inside the smokey bar but I couldn’t go back in. I drank my wine outside but that meant that I wasn’t making the most of being with my parents. Daisy and the Aussies came out to join me and I got updates on the eventful first week of January, which I’d missed from being so ill.
I decided I’d had enough of the smoking inside, and complained to Ozzy, it is illegal here and the bar owner can get fined 9,000 lira (£236.22) per time. He listened and said he would take it onboard.
As I was finishing my drink a drunk woman was becoming annoying to my friends so I messaged Fikri for my taxi, said goodbye and left.

Dalyan – 26th December

It was the day that Josh and Martha had to go home on Tuesday 26th December and I was going to miss them a lot. We had laughed so much this last week and had done some really nice things together; mainly eating and drinking! It had also got me through the depressing fiasco of having not been paid and took my mind off being skint. My Christmas Day this year had been one of the best I’d had abroad and we’d spent less than £120 between the two of us. I wondered how much the average Christmas Day spend had been amongst my friends in the UK!
I cut up an apple and some of the Köyceğiz cheese and fanned it out all posh on a plate so that Martha could have a nibble or two before we had to leave the apartment. Josh was on ‘provisions for the airport’ duty and I helped by giving him spare food. I had my overnight oats with persimmon for breakfast, I was going to have to get back on the Slimming World plan as the weigh in on Wednesday was probably going to be quite enlightening. When Martha had packed she asked me if I would like her hair straighteners, as she was buying new ones when she got home. What a lovely thing to do and it was my first set of hair straighteners in years.
I’m not sure what on earth was going on in Captain Caveman’s head because what happened next was awkward! We’d mentioned previously that we would be getting the bus to Bill and Jaxx’s, who were on the same flight as Josh and Martha. Jaxx had said to get to Villa Infinity, between Marmarlı and Okçular, for about noon and we could go through the final dog requirements and have a wee drink before the taxi came at 1pm. Captain Caveman and I were sharing the dog sitting while they went back to the UK to visit Bill’s mom. I’d mentioned the bus several times, we’d toyed with the idea of getting a taxi but had discounted it as we would have 4 of us, plus bags meaning not enough room for a regular taxi.
We were ready and about to put our shoes on when Captain Caveman said he was cycling and would see us there. I was confused, I didn’t have internet on my phone so I couldn’t call or find it if we got lost and, if there had only been 3 of us we would have ordered a taxi. I was fuming with him, why hadn’t he said this earlier? I knew he’d probably done it to force me to learn how to find my way to places as he hates that I don’t use maps and I get lost easily. It was embarrassing and I could tell that Josh and Martha were doing the looks to say this was one of ‘those moments’. I didn’t even say bye to Captain Caveman as I was so annoyed that he would be so rude and the rest of us went to the bus stop. We got off the bus and Captain Caveman was waiting at the side of the road a bit further up to point out the turning to us. I was even more mad now that he probably thought we couldn’t manage to find it without him. I knew in his head he wanted to make sure he had his bicycle with him because he probably wanted to go Dogging tomorrow, after missing it yesterday – but he could have communicated it. Josh and Martha could see I was mad and couldn’t understand what was going on either, they didn’t even laugh at the situation this time.
Big Boy, the big black dog, and Lucy, the Airedale terrier, were pleased to see us and were friendly. They really liked Martha and tried to encourage her to share her pack-up for at the airport.
Bill took Captain Caveman in to the kitchen to show him how to work the TV, coffee machine and fire, show him what was what with the dogs, etc. I sat outside with Jaxx, Josh and Martha and had a wine.
The taxi arrived and we all said our goodbyes, with plans to visit Josh and Martha in July 2024.
The dogs were a little sad that their parents had gone and I tried to speak to Captain Caveman about what was going on with the bike v bus palaver earlier. He didn’t think he was wrong, obviously, and he got more wine and some pastries out of the kitchen. Bill and Jaxx had told us to help ourself to wine and food but I didn’t want to take advantage, I never do.
Captain Caveman was on fire duty and we both cuddled and stroked Big Boy. Lucy was a bit more free spirited and quite vocal. When it came to the dogs’ dinner time, they wolfed it down and enjoyed it, they also had some home made dog biscuits which looked great. Captain Caveman cooked us some veggie pasta for dinner and we had a cosy night in our new temporary home.
I still totted up my syns for the week and was on 426, 4 times the allowance! I was bound to have put weight on but I’m sure anyone who had said ‘well, it is Christmas’, would be in the same boat.

Dalyan – 29th to 31st October

We had a nice relaxing day on Sunday 29th October. Captain Caveman got his bicycle wheel fixed for 135 lira (£3.96) which he was pleased about. We shared a sausage roll and a cheese & onion roll each for breakfast and both agreed they were lovely. For lunch I had cheese spread and bread but I decided to make a vegetable curry in the slow cooker for dinner. While I was chopping the veg, Captain Caveman got a call from our friend Caroline. We know her from Phong Nha, in Vietnam, she lives in Hoi An now and is Australian but had been in Greece for the last month. Caroline had made loose plans to see us in Rhodes but they never materialised so she would like to come and visit us in Dalyan…. tomorrow! Her flight would land in Dalaman airport at 3pm so it was all systems go to make up the spare bed and get the house clean for our friend’s arrival.
We had the veggie curry with steamed rice which was delicious and, of course, we had some spare. We had a few grapes after and wondered how long a visit to Dalyan Caroline was planning.

I worked from 8am until 5pm on Monday 30th October and this would be my last week of working 16 hours. I’d already done some extra from last week so it meant I’d definitely be finished by Tuesday. I had Yorkshire tea and buttered wholemeal toast for breakfast. Captain Caveman went dogging, he likes to walk the dogs at the dog shelter so sometimes he goes up there to help out. He was back for lunch so we had leftover cauliflower mac and cheese.
As we knew Caroline was arriving this afternoon, we asked the taxi to take her to Lukka bar, where Captain Caveman would go to meet her. I would finish working and then join them.
As I was getting changed to go meet Caroline and Captain Caveman, I saw a post on Facebook reporting a dog that had turned up at someone’s house in Dalyan. It looked similar to Debbie (Darling)’s Brinny but had a different collar on. I messaged Debbie (Darling) who said it was Brinny’s sister, owned by a Turkish man.
I also had a message from Kelly, back in the UK, the girls were hoping to be able to book their holiday to Rhodes for next September and had a few questions. It was a long way off but I hoped I’d be able to join them for a holiday.
I met Caroline and Captain Caveman at Lukka bar, she looked well and was dressed for winter despite the warm weather in Dalyan. We had a beer together and she told us a bit about her trip to Greece and Sweden. We couldn’t sit about as we had a night out to get to so it was back home for curry before heading out to Sofra bar. The Bengisu Boys were playing a gig and they are great musicians so it turned in to a good night. By 10pm both Captain Caveman and I were on the Sofra ‘dancefloor’ giving it what-for! Caroline was too cool for dancing with the ‘olds’ but was testing out the drink menu and being acquainted with our friends.
VLS arrived and I did a karaoke song with her. It was awful and I could see that Şükrü would never let me put in another request! By 11.30pm Brinny’s sister, the escaped dog, had found us and was keeping us company. The walk home, at just gone midnight, involved several stray dogs escorting us home and Caroline tried not to get attached, as she loves dogs.

On Tuesday 31st October Captain Caveman went off to Bridge so that I could work in peace, leaving Caroline with me. I had plans at lunch time to go over to Jamie’s as I was looking after his cute little dogs, Norman and Edna, for a few days. It turned out I’d got confused about the amount of hours I needed to work this week as my boss only wanted me to do 8 per week with immediate affect as from last week, so I’d already worked them. It was going to be incredibly tight for money for the next couple of months so it’s a good job we don’t do Christmas presents or celebrate Christmas out here, in Turkey.
I left Caroline to her own devices following a discussion about the use of psilocybin mushrooms for trauma. I packed a bag and headed over to Jamie’s, taking my lunch with me.
Around 1.15pm I was just getting a nice feta cheese salad ready to eat when Captain Caveman arrived at Jamie’s. He was meant to have been going back home to see Caroline for lunch but shared my salad. I sent him over to look after our guest with instructions to keep in touch while I looked after Norman and Edna. I didn’t see or hear from Captain Caveman or Caroline again that evening so I had a lovely quiet one with a leftover chicken and veggie curry. I obviously stayed over at Jamie’s and the pooches wanted to come upstairs to bed with me. I told them they had to sleep in their own bed downstairs and gave them a kiss. I didn’t have any alcohol, it was Fat Club tomorrow and I was only on 273 syns for the week. The Fat Club meeting tomorrow had a taster session that we all had to take something for so I’d brought over my ingredients to make something in the morning.

Dalyan – 27th August

I was awake on Sunday 27th August before Captain Caveman landed in Dalaman, on time, at 7.55am. I checked the weather forecast and it looked to be a bit cooler than what he’s used to in Vietnam but still quite warm and dry. He was only going to be here for a week and then he had a Europe and UK trip planned, so he hoped to make the most of being back in Dalyan just for a short time. The most important thing was for me to sort out all the necessary paperwork so that I would be able renew my residency. Hopefully, I would have everything he needed to sign, completed before we left for another trip to Rhodes.
Captain Caveman arrived but, as he gets paid in Vietnamese Dong, he had no Turkish money. I went out to pay Fikri, the taxi fare of 850 lira (£25) while he brought in all his luggage. I was excited to see him but by 10am I was even happier – he’d managed to get me some Yorkshire teabags! His friend, Damo, had purchased a box from Cornwall, took it to Saigon to handover to Captain Caveman and then he’d brought it over to Dalyan! Unfortunately, there had still been no 2024 diaries anywhere on his journey so I would have to wait until he went back to England.
I’d waited to have my breakfast with Captain Caveman but he’d eaten already so I had fresh figs, banana, strawberries and quark with a nice cup of Yorkshire tea. I drank quite a bit of cucumber infused water in the hope of my eczema clearing up but it still looked quite bad.

By 2pm I was sending a copy of Captain Caveman’s tapu (deeds) and his tax code to Sonuç for my residency renewal file. At 3pm we decided to head over for a cheeky snifter at Tez bar before we went to meet Clare and Kelly at Lukka bar. Tez wasn’t there but his wife, Rabia, was feeding Bailey the new kitten so we had to get a photo. Of course, with Captain Caveman having been in Vietnam for 9 months I’d decided to book us in for a traditional meal as his first one.

All 4 of us were booked in for a Sunday lunch at Lukka where they do amazing Yorkshire puddings. We had pre-ordered the meat choices; Captain Caveman was having lamb and the 3 of us were having beef. The lamb dinner was 495 lira (£14.77), 400 lira (£11.94) for the beef dinner and that included apple pie and ice-cream. Captain Caveman had a couple of Efes beers which were 85 lira (£2.54) each. My glass of rosé wine was 98 lira (£2.98) but I didn’t order a second one as I wasn’t keen on the Buzbağ rosé. We shared a large bottle of water which was 45 lira (£1.34) as we needed to keep hydrated.
The food and service were good and I really enjoyed what I managed to eat, a little less than half of my meal went in to Tupperware for another day as it was huge. I even took my apple pie home as I was trying to be good. It’s not the cheapest place in town, we’d paid 1,248 lira (£37.25) for Captain Caveman and my Sunday lunch with drinks, but we had full tummies and enjoyed it. Clare and Kelly both said it would have cost more than that where they live in England so it was a nice treat, for a bit of a change.

Just after eating our meal, I got sad news that a friend, John, had died. He was the guy I met when I volunteered to push him round the Dalyan 5k Race in a wheelchair. He was quite a character and a lovely fella so I was rather sad. We decided to pop to Bistro Blue for a bit of a drink and I was in a bit of a daze for Clare’s farewell drinks. I managed a pint of draft Efes, Captain Caveman had another Efes Malt, Clare a gin & tonic and Kelly an English Garden cocktail.
On the second round I just had half and everyone else had the same as before. Here’s what we paid for the drinks:

1 litre of water 75.00
330ml draft Efes 75.00
500ml draft Efes 90.00
500ml Efes Malt 90.00
Gin & Tonic 130.00
English Garden cocktail 330.00

Our total bill for 4 of us came to 1,415 lira (£42.24) but the cocktails are probably the same as you’d pay in the UK. Back home, I was back on the cucumber water, while Captain Caveman had a gin and tonic and I made him a mini pizza wrap in the airfryer. While I was happy that Captain Caveman was back, I was sad that Clare and Kelly were leaving tomorrow.

Dalyan – 18th & 19th December

I’d not slept from coughing most of the night and was still feeling rough on Sunday 18th December. Before I’d got out of bed I’d had messages from various people about buses to the beach on Christmas Eve. When I’ve been before I’ve just got the public bus but for some reason people were getting their knickers in a twist about organising private mini buses to take everyone. Captain Caveman and I had already decided we would get a taxi because then we could take Charlie and if it got too much for him we could leave when we wanted. I’d already checked with Fikri that he would allow Charlie in the car and he would. I told my Mom, Vanessa and Kate that we would be doing that. We would also be meeting Josh in Lukka bar as soon as we got back from the beach and that they could join us too. For some unknown reason one of the expats in Tez Bar had told my mom that I was organising a trip to Fethiye or Çalış for next week. This lead my Mom to wonder why I hadn’t asked her when the reality was I was sick in bed, was never involved and it wasn’t true – sometimes I despair! While Captain Caveman went dogging and looked after the dog walking, I had soup and toast. I was exhausted but I finished what I needed to do, by which time Captain Caveman had gone to watch Dalyan Spor play football in the afternoon. I’d managed to make a curry in the slow cooker for dinner before going back to bed.

I was still sick and awake from coughing at 5am on Monday 19th December. Captain Caveman made me a bacon sandwich when he got up and I ate it in bed. We had an invite to Jan and David’s Christmas party this lunch time and I really wanted to go but I was very conscious that, although I’d tested negative for Covid, whatever I had got didn’t need to be passed on to anyone (vulnerable or not). Jan and David are in Captain Caveman’s Bridge group so he’d become quite good friends with them and we were both pleased to have been invited. Captain Caveman thought I looked much better and suggested I go but I didn’t think I should. I stayed at ‘home’ with Charlie, made a slow cooker meal with roast potatoes for later and slept, a lot. When Captain Caveman returned he had a Christmas card and 6 mince pies from Jan and David and I was really touched. I could tell I was ill as it made me emotional when I bit in to one of the rather delicious mince pies. Captain Caveman said he’d had a good time at the party with some lovely food and nice people.
I went back to bed, slept more and woke up feeling a little bit like I was starting to recover. For the first time in 4 days I decided to join Captain Caveman and Charlie on their walk and wrapped myself up warmly. We had only gone to Poo corner and were heading back in the direction of the corner shop so we could pick up some bread when I started to get out of breath. This flu bug really had knocked it out of me and, as we approached the end of the road, we saw Vanessa, Matt and my parents sat in Waterfall bar. They had been out to Dalaman for the day and had called in to our local for a beer. We went in but I was so wary of being near them in case I passed on my illness and I wasn’t really functioning properly. Mehmet automatically brought me a beer which I didn’t want and I gave most of it to Captain Caveman. I don’t even remember what we talked about apart from buses and Christmas Eve beach arrangements. By 7pm we were eating sausage casserole with lovely roast potatoes and I was back in bed early.

Dalyan to Singapore – 4th June

I was a bit sloshed and very tired as Fikri drove me from Dalyan to Dalaman airport, in the early hours of Saturday 4th June. We were there before 2.30am and it had cost me 325 lira (£16.25) for the one way trip. I was able to check in straight away for my domestic flight at 3.30am to Istanbul, there was no queue. I didn’t bother with the airport lounge at Dalaman as there was no point, but I intended to go to the one in Istanbul, using my freshly acquired Priority Pass. The flight was on time, we got water and a cheese sandwich on the flight and when we landed I was so tired that I hoped the lounge had comfy reclining seats.
I got the free ‘one hour only’ WiFi code in the airport, sat down to check messages and let Captain Caveman know I had arrived in Istanbul, it was 9am over there but only 5am here. I couldn’t check in for my flight until 10am so I waited, in various uncomfortable metal seats, until it was time to get in the queue. The check-in finally opened late, at 10.45am, and the woman dealing with me had an issue. My visa specified that I will land at Tan Son Nhat airport in Ho Chi Minh City but my ticket was to Saigon. She had no idea they were the same place so, even when I told her, she still had to get her manager. We were wasting valuable lounge time here so I chatted to her a little in Turkish, I told her I was learning the language and that I’d been on holiday in Dalyan. She loves Dalyan so she became more friendly while we waited for the manager. Eventually I was sorted, nothing else was checked and my luggage would be checked straight through to Saigon.
I was boarding at 12.40pm so I was disappointed that I now had less than 2 hours in the lounge. I had a couple of draught Efes before getting a couple of bowls of lentil soup, bread rolls, cheeses, olives, salads etc. The breakfast food was still out but they started to put out the lunch so I grabbed a couple of sandwiches then went back to the bar for more beer. My next flight to Singapore was the longest part of my journey, we set off on time at 1.25pm (Turkish time) and would be landing in about 11 hours time. I hoped I might get some sleep on the way but it was a full plane and there was not much chance of that. We got a nice meal of beef with veg and potatoes but I left the dessert which was a chocolate Cornetto – Singapore Airlines food is pretty good though. I managed 3 glasses of red wine, seeing as it was free but then there was a bit of turbulence and we all had to sit down for a few hours. The woman next to me was from Indonesia and spoke no English so that was a bonus, her daughter at the other side of her was nice and polite. She told me of a secret waterfall near Dait, where she lives in West Kalimantan, Indonesia, and invited me to go there. Maybe Captain Caveman and I would visit it one day, as he has been to, and has friends in, East Kalimantan.

Dalyan – 25th & 26th April

I had a croissant for breakfast on Monday 25th April and was extra tired from not getting much sleep. I’d still got the winter quilt on so it was a tad warm and I’d slept in the spare room because of the handle coming off the ensuite bathroom in the main bedroom. I was meant to go over to collect my stuff from Mark and Kate’s house today but I couldn’t be bothered, instead I went to get some essentials from the supermarket. I had a simit and cheese spread for lunch and didn’t do much else really. I booked in for Pilates tomorrow and I got news that a friend was arriving in Dalyan on Thursday so I needed a couple of days off, in readiness for more shenanigans which I imagined could get messy. For dinner I had a cup of Yorkshire tea and some pasta with Turkish sausage and pesto sauce, then for afters a Bounty chocolate bar. It was nice to be home where I could relax completely for a couple of days.

It was another easy day on Tuesday 26th April, there was meant to be a power outage in the afternoon but it never happened. My parents were staying in with a slow cooker meal that night too and it was my first time at a new Pilates class. I had Christmas cake with cheese on for breakfast and loved it. In the afternoon I walked over to Mark and Kate’s to collect the rest of my stuff and Bluey2. When I arrived they were eating the leftover Chinese meal which was quite a few days old and asked if I wanted to share it. I declined as I could see it wouldn’t sit well with my stomach and I chatted with them while Kate instructed Mark on how to warm up food in an oven, the correct way! News came that masks for the under 65s in shops and public buildings were no longer compulsory in Turkey so I was slightly concerned that there could be an increased risk of catching the virus.
Before I cycled Bluey2 back home, Mark and I arranged to meet at Okyanus for a beer in the sun before the pilates class at The Room Dalyan. Our friend met us at the class and it was definitely more difficult than I anticipated. My bad leg still wouldn’t allow for certain positions but the sciatic nerve pain I’d had seemed to benefit from the stretches. I was surprised to see how good at pilates Mark was, he was pretty flexible (for a Tuesday)! After the class, Mark went home with indigestion and I met up with Drew, Ann, Sarah, her friend and Katrina at Lukka bar to say bye to Drew. He was off back to the UK and so I had a glass of wine to see him and Sarah’s mate off. After hugging and kissing Drew goodbye I went home to have a mystery meal I’d got out of the freezer earlier, it turned out to be teryaki chicken so I was lucky to have cooked rice with it. Tomorrow’s plan was to attend a big celebration for Dutch King’s Day at Waterfall bar which I’d been invited to by a couple of Dutch friends.

Dalyan to Mosborough – 11th December

Saturday 11th December was a day of travelling and a little bit of a shock to my system. I’d been in Dalyan for 79 days when my alarm went off at 7am, I had my last probiotic drink to try to prevent any stomach issues on my journey and the taxi arrived early, while it was still slightly dark, but I was ready! I’d decided only to take hand luggage because I didn’t want the added risk of taking luggage and changing in Istanbul so my rucksack was jammed full and exactly 8kg, probably from the weight of the Turkish delight. When I arrived at Dalaman airport I was early but the Turkish Airlines check-in was open, helpful and they managed to book me through from Dalaman to London, so I could have brought luggage, after all. I requested aisle seats on both flights and got given both boarding cards, my flight from Dalaman to Istanbul would be on time despite the storms and heavy rain, which was good to know. Near the gate I bought water and a simit at an empty cafe, which gave free WiFi (no WiFi is available in the main departure area, only at the cafe’s near the gate).

On the first flight, which was quite busy but not full, we were given a picnic lunch and we were all told not to open them all at the same time due to Corona (everyone did though) and masks being mandatory. I put mine in my bag as I didn’t want to remove my mask on the plane and was trying not to catch Corona for Christmas. I had 3 hours until the next flight in Istanbul airport and it appeared to be quite empty when I landed. Where the gates are, there were hardly any seats so I managed to get my G-Shock watch amended at the place where I bought it, as it hadn’t been accurate since I’d had the battery replaced in Fethiye. There was also a machine to get free WiFi but it only lasted for 1 hour. I found a quiet spot, away from any scheduled flights, to sit and eat my picnic. I noticed that at some gates they were doing random PCR tests and extra security checks which included double checking the vaccine proof documents. At the gate for my Istanbul to London Heathrow flight, the staff asked to check my vaccine certificate and the people behind and in front of me had to have their bags searched. On the half empty plane I sat next to a man from Torquay who had been to Istanbul for hair transplants but after take off we were allowed to move in to the spare seats. This meant I could drink the red wine and beef köfte and rice which they brought for our lunch without someone nearby. I watched a film called The Prestige which seemed ok but we were landing before the end of it and so I may never know what happens.

The flight from Istanbul to London Heathrow was due to land at 4.05pm. I had to get myself on the tube to London St Pancras train station to my pre-booked PCR test near to the Champagne bar. Luckily the flight landed a little bit early and I was on the very busy tube by 4.15pm, still masked up and trying my best not to touch anything. The queues at Collinson test centre were long despite everyone in the queue having an appointment and it being a bit chaotic. The staff were nice, most of the customers queued patiently with masks on but there were a few cantankerous old so-and-sos who weren’t behaving themselves and putting pressure on the staff to try to jump the queue. I had to wait longer than expected but, as the staff explained, the sudden changes in rules had lead to lots of demand and they were doing their best to cope. They were doing a fantastic job and I managed to get done before I had to get my train to Sheffield at 6.30pm, which I got sat on by 6.25pm so I was very lucky to have made it. The train was busy, hadn’t been cleaned and only a handful of people were wearing masks despite the constant announcement that it was mandatory. I’d unfortunately picked a busy time to be travelling, the Champagne bar at St Pancras had been heaving as I passed, the Leeds V Chelsea football match was on and there were numerous piss heads on a pre-Christmas celebration or work do. A nice Spanish family sat opposite me on the train and got a bit of a shock when Santa (aka shit-faced Alan) boarded the train at Derby with his inebriated elf mates. The profanities let me know he wasn’t the real Santa straight away and at first it was amusing that the children near me hadn’t sussed it. When Santa and his helpers burped, farted, sang and swore their way to a joke about Jimmy Saville I signalled to the mom that she might want to move her kids away – they got off at Chesterfield!
There was WiFi on the train so I managed to let my parents and sister know I had made it and would be in Sheffield by 9.45pm and would get a taxi to Mosborough, where I would have to continue to isolate until my PCR test result came back negative.

When I alighted the train at Sheffield I wasn’t quite ready for it, I felt like I had gone back a few years and landed in to the middle of a debauched Christmas do, not unlike the ones I used to frequent. I didn’t see many sober people, nor anyone with masks (but I found out later you don’t have to wear them in a taxi queue) and a great deal of people were absolutely hammered!
I decided to use the cash machine to draw out some extra Christmas cash but my card wouldn’t work, I was desperate for a wee, drink and a snack but decided Sheffield station would not be the best place for any of those and it would be better just to get to my parents house.
The taxi cost just £12.50, I kept my mask on but the driver didn’t wear one and was on the phone the whole journey. When I arrived at my parents I was so desperate for the loo that I bypassed both of them and went to the bathroom, where I also took all of my hat, scarf, gloves, coat and mask off beforehand. After a good wash and putting my outer garments in a plastic bag for washing I gave Ma & Pa a big hug. I’d been feeling so tired on the train but now at 10.30pm (1.30am Turkish time) I had a glass of water and some crisps, while Dad opened a bottle of fizz! It wouldn’t be a proper family celebration if we didn’t give the ball a right old kick and so we managed to stay up until 2.30am (5.30am Turkish time) meaning I had done 22.5 hours from leaving my Dalyan bed to getting in my Mosborough one! We were so glad to see each other again and none of us cared that we were up drinking so late, it’s not like we had anything much to do tomorrow, with me isolating!

joloyolo

The ramblings and observations of a fortysomething lady of leisure

Tag: Dalaman