Phong Nha – 29th April

I woke up to a dead Motthew on Monday 29th April, the creature lay lifeless on the floor near the door. Captain Caveman and I didn’t have time for breakfast as we had to get packed and ready for a wedding. We were checking out of the very lovely Highway 20 Homestay as Captain Caveman had made arrangements for us to stay at a homestay with a pool. I was glad as the temperatures were certainly hotting up and a swimming pool would be so nice.
We got dressed for Nhi’s wedding, me in a floaty red dress and Captain Caveman in his stork shirt which he had made in Saigon. Mr Toan, the Oxalis driver, is Nhi’s dad so Captain Caveman was keen to show up despite the horrendous heat. We parked our bicycles outside Mr Toan’s house and walked down the lane to the tent/gazebo structure in the field. It was massive and there was a queue to get in as we popped money in an envelope then shook a lot of hands with bride, groom and all the family. Everyone had scrubbed up very well and Mr & Mrs Toan looked so proud of their daughter, who is beautiful and clever.
Of course, Captain Caveman was beckoned over by the Oxalis lads to sit next to Mr Tu. As I’d been brushing up on my Vietnamese a bit I was able to greet everyone and ask how they were, including the pianist guy who I sat next to. All was going well, although I was sweating profusely, until someone removed the cellophane from the squid. For some reason I could smell it and I started to feel quite unwell. I could only keep sipping water and trying not to vomit everywhere and Captain Caveman was a bit concerned I would have to leave. I couldn’t leave as at 11am the ceremony was starting and I had to focus. I ate a few pieces of pomelo and sipped water but I was feeling really awful, like I might pass out.
By 11.04am Nhi and her new husband were on the stage with the families doing the obligatory red champagne rituel and I was dodging any food passed my way. Captain Caveman soldiered on, taking one for the team with all the food and beers. Many men came to do cheers with Captain Caveman, including one guy who gave him a kiss. When I asked who he was, Captain Caveman said he had never met him before! Vietnamese weddings are so culturally different and highly entertaining but I was flagging. I managed an hour then noticed some people leaving so we also decided to leave.

**Photo credit – some by Captain Caveman**

Video of the bridal party entrance

Riding Bluey in a floaty dress was not ideal but I suggested we stop at Oxalis for me to use the loo and grab a cold drink. I ended up ordering some sweet potato fries and putting loads of salt on, maybe I was suffering from dehydration or heat stroke. The temperature had reached 41°C by 1.25pm with a ‘feels like 44°C’ as I sipped a Revive (a rehydration type drink). While Captain Caveman sorted out laundry, swapped his bicycle for the motorbike and did some general chores, I got changed at Oxalis then had a nap next to a fan until I started to feel much better.
By 4pm Captain Caveman and I had checked in to the amazingly beautiful and relaxing Greenfield Ecostay. The owners, René and Ngan, were very welcoming and they gave us a lovely double room, number 3. We had a fridge, a working kettle, cups, spoons, all the toiletries and a view over the garden and rice fields. The swimming pool was the cleanest and undoubtedly the best I’d seen in Phong Nha. After my heat related wobble, the swimming pool was the first thing we tested out and I was very impressed. We had an hour or so to relax but then I had promised to hang out with the girls at Phong Nha Vegan from 6pm.

One of the ‘lessons’ on the agenda tonight was allergies so Captain Caveman drove me over on Trigger, the motorbike. It was romantic as we drove along the rice paddies just before sunset.
At the Vegan we practiced some English and Vietnamese, tried to get to the bottom of peanut allergy procedures and I ate a very tasty veggie fried rice with an iced kumquat tea. The 8km journey back was not so pleasant as I had to cycle Bluey in the dark and it wasn’t as easy to remember the way. I needed a white wine and soda when I got back and René had some nice wine in the fridge.

Phong Nha – 28th April

Captain Caveman was due back out of Son Doong on Sunday 28th April so, after a bit of a tidy up in the new room, I headed out for the day. I’d slept with my head at the other end of the bed as there was a giant moth fluttering about near the window where the pillows had been. I’d affectionately called him Motthew and was happier with him than spiders, cockroaches or cicadas despite still being a bit scared. I went to The Villa’s and had a Pho Ga and a litre of water and they gave me hot water and milk for my Yorkshire tea bag. I spent some time there catching up on some writing and had french toast with bacon for lunch/second breakfast. It turned out to be the hottest day on record so far and I was certainly not in any fit state to be cycling very far. Captain Caveman was back by 3pm and came to join me about half past. He had his usual classic pizza with olives instead of mushrooms and I didn’t have a piece because I was being good.
While Captain Caveman went to his gala dinner I went to offer some very sweaty company to the girls at Phong Nha Vegan. They fed me the Mi Xao Gion which is a crispy vegetable ramen dish and was really tasty. I genuinely was loving the food at the Vegan and was finding my stomach enjoyed it even more.
After the Vegan, Captain Caveman and I met back up at The Villa’s for a quick drink before it closed, then cycled back for our last night at Highway 20. I introduced Captain Caveman to Motthew and he had to get rid of a cockroach in the bathroom, this time a black one and a bit smaller. We were also looking forward to another holiday within a holiday, a staycation, as Captain Caveman had quite a few days off from tomorrow.

Phong Nha – 27th April

At 8.45am on Saturday 27th April I was asked to move rooms at Highway 20 to accommodate a large group of Vietnamese who were coming for the Reunification weekend. Of course I was happy to move, especially as I had a second cockroach in the bathroom last night plus Jeff had brought a friend who had been even nearer to the toilet. Nga’s husband, Quan, had to go remove it as I was too scared. Nga said to leave my stuff and she would move everything for me, except for the bugs. I had arranged to meet Hoan and Chung at the river side coffee place, closest to The Villa’s. When I arrived, it was after 9am and I parked Bluey in the shade as it was already looking to be a very hot day. Lan and Minh Thuy (from The Villas) were also there and were having some drinks. I ordered a fresh coconut as I was only on 59 syns so far this week so I didn’t mind using 5 more. By 10.15am Hoan, Chung and I were back at Phong Nha Vegan and I was invited to join the staff lunch. They had papaya salad, winter melon and braised eggplant with chillies so the chef had made me a Bun Tron without chillies. It was very nice and I really enjoyed it but I knew I’d be hungry again later as the dish is very light.
As it was getting rather hot, Chung gave me a lift on her motorbike to pick up laundry from Oxalis. I paid 120,000VND (£3.69) and Chung gave me a lift to drop it off at Highway 20, where I picked up the key to the new room, then went back to the Vegan.
Later, I intended to cycle home but it was so hot and I didn’t have any suncream on, so I called in to The Villa’s. I had a mango smoothie, 1 litre of water, 1 pot of Jasmine tea and a vegetarian pizza for 260,000VND (£8). I took half of the pizza home with me as it was quite large. It was my 3rd consecutive day of no meat and no alcohol as I was determined to get back on the Slimming World plan this week.
That evening I was at the Vegan from 6pm to 9pm and it was busy again. As I was leaving though, I was given a kilogram of mangosteen as they know they are mine and Captain Caveman’s favourite fruit. I ate the rest of the veggie pizza for dinner and saved the mangosteen as Captain Caveman was due out of the cave tomorrow.

Phong Nha – 25th & 26th April

Captain Caveman was off back in to the big cave on Thursday 25th April so he gave me some cash to last me the next 4 days. He gave me 3 million dong (£92.17) for emergency money and 1 million (£30.72) for me to spend. I already had 120,000VND (£3.69) so I added that into the funds and worked out a budget of 280,000VND (£8.82) per day, in Captain Caveman’s absence. We both cycled to Oxalis where he had a coffee and I just had water, and there we said goodbye.
I then decided I would do some writing at The Villa’s and have breakfast and lunch there. Here’s what I had and the prices, in Dong;
1 pot jasmine tea 50,000
1 french toast with banana 90,000
1 soda water 25,000
1 mushroom pasta 150,000
Total 315,000VND (£9.72)

I had a quick phonecall with Caroline who was hoping to come to Phong Nha to visit next month. As I was eating lunch, 4 young British lads came in to escape the midday sun, one of whom was shirtless. Brits abroad get everywhere and the staff were so embarrassed as it is not polite at all to be half naked in Vietnam, unless you’re at the beach or swimming.
I went to Phong Nha Vegan around 6pm where the chef fed me a Banh Canh which is a vegan soup with thicker rice noodles and lots of vegetables. It was delicious and very filling.
At 8.30pm, I cycled Bluey home, a hot mess, to quickly take a shower before a video call with my parents. Today had been hot but the forecast for tomorrow was looking to reach 40°C, with less than 50% humidity. It was a good job the homestay had good Aircon.
While I was there I also paid some of the money I owed to the agent looking after Captain Caveman’s apartment for the balcony work and transferred some of the money, he’d sent to me, in to my Turkish account.

I was playing catch up on my blog writing on Friday 26th April, being away and having visitors had left me a little behind. In the morning, after catching up, I watched the rest of Baby Reindeer, which I’d enjoyed despite the disturbing content. After an incident with a cockroach in the bathroom, I decided to cycle down to The Villa’s for a fruit salad which comes with yoghurt and granola, for a late breakfast. I had a lemon juice without sugar and some fried spring rolls for lunch then a cup of tea. My bill came to 170,000VND (£5.22) which was reasonable and the AC was very welcomed.
Some bad news came from Turkey which, if true, was going to be a pain for me; residency renewals from 1st May were only going to be given to people who rent (like me) for 6 months. It would still cost the same as a year or two which were previously available. This meant that I would be spending more and having to be in Turkey to apply twice per year. They had also stopped any new residency applications for people who rent a property.
Phong Nha Vegan was so hot and very busy, there was a cooler which was set at 35°C to try to keep us less sweaty but it had reached 40°C and I was begging for mercy. My phone was overheating and stopped working so there were no photos either. After helping with some English translation from 6pm to 9.30pm without stopping for a minute, I was done. I didn’t have any food that night just a piece of corn on the cob and some herbal tea. This weekend was a Vietnamese holiday so I didn’t expect tomorrow to be less busy but maybe more Vietnamese in town.

Phong Nha – 23rd & 24th April

Captain Caveman was busy on the morning of Tuesday 23rd April. He had another day off so he went to Oxalis first thing, was sorting out tips and then getting a haircut and shave. I went to join Amanda and Greg for their last breakfast in Phong Nha, at the Mountain House. Amanda’s banana and honey pancakes were so beautifully presented, I had a lovely fruit salad and Greg had a bowl of pho. They each got an extra fruit salad with yoghurt too. I was still feeling a bit delicate and wasn’t sure why, again.
I popped to The Villa’s after breakfast and had a jasmine tea with a matcha tea biscuit on the side and half a litre of water as it was a hot day. Captain Caveman, Tatas and I met back up again in the afternoon at Mountain House to say farewell to the Aussies as they headed to Dong Hoi airport. They would fly to Saigon and have a day there before their flight to Sydney. It was sad to see them go, especially knowing that they had really enjoyed their 4 months off and did not want to leave.
By 6pm I was at Phong Nha Vegan chatting to the owner, Hoan, and eating fresh spring rolls. Captain Caveman had gone to join Hung at the Rice House for dinner where he was trying some new dishes. At around 8.45pm I cycled to The Villas for a glass of red wine and to meet Captain Caveman. I was meant to have a video call with Ma & Pa but by the time we got back to Highway 20 it was 10pm and I didn’t want to disturb the other guests as the walls were thin. Jeff was still around and Captain Caveman had to tell him to make himself scarce when I went in.

On Wednesday 24th April Captain Caveman had the day off but his briefing was at 6pm so we had a few things to get done. It was also weigh day and the 7th Dalyan Fat Club I had missed. Bizarrely, I had put 3cm on my bust, lost 1cm from my waist and put 1cm on my hips. I had no idea what my weight was.
We decided to eat breakfast at Highway 20 Homestay, where we were staying, to give it a try. The lovely Nga brought me hot water for me to make my own Yorkshire tea! I’d not had one for over 2 weeks so it was nice to enjoy one while our pho and omelette was being prepared. It cost 115,000VND (£3.53) for beef noodles for me, an omelette with bread and a black coffee for Captain Caveman.
In the morning, he sorted all the tips out, which took a while. As a treat for lunch, Captain Caveman took me to Ganesh, the Indian restaurant, where we shared onion bhajis, lamb Samosas, chicken tikka starter, saffron rice, takka dahl and a garlic naan bread. It was really delicious and we had some left to takeaway.
To meet the Turkish residency rules and to pay for our balcony woodwork, Captain Caveman transferred me the money and then I would pay our agent, in Turkish lira.
At 3.30pm I had a meeting with a book publisher about getting one or two of my ideas in to print. Claire was really helpful and I really liked her, I think she got my humour and we did have a laugh. Unfortunately, for what I wanted her to do for me to get to the finished, published and illustrated product, it was going to cost me money we didn’t have. I needed another way but I wasn’t sure that I had the skills to be able to self publish it – we would see.
That evening, when Captain Caveman was at Oxalis, I went to Phong Nha Vegan and tried a dish called Bun Tron. It is a cold dish made from rice noodles, ribbons of cucumber, mango and carrot, tofu, lettuce, herbs and peanuts topped with a fake fish sauce. I had it without any chillies. It was a very sweaty night and I had an incident with a cicada which wasn’t too pleasant. It flew at me and went down my top, got scared and clung on to my bra, so much so that the waitress had to come and get it off for me. Captain Caveman came to meet me after his briefing and he had a beer while he waited for me to be ready to go home. It was 9pm when we left the Vegan, it closes at 10pm, and went back to Highway 20 where Dollar barked at me, again.

Photo credit – farewell photos taken with Greg’s camera

Phong Nha – 22nd April

Monday 22nd April was Amanda and Greg’s last full day in Phong Nha and Captain Caveman had a day off so I’d suggested we have a little outing. Our first job was to check out of the Phong Nha Homestay, which had been amazing and it was going to be hard to find somewhere as good for the price. We were moving to a more rustic homestay further out of town and had told Vinh, the owner, that we would be checking in after 4pm. Captain Caveman and I packed our bags and left them in reception, letting them know we would pick them up later. The car picked up the Aussies, then drove down to collect us and was costing just 400,000VND (£12.33) to have the car take 4 of us to the Pub with Cold Beer and then wait for us and bring us back again later. That was an absolute bargain however, it turned out the road was being repaired so the driver could only take us as far as the suspension bridge. We had to walk over it but both Amanda and I were scared of walking on the metal mesh surface which you can see the river below on. It was very hot but we were glad to get to the Pub with Cold Beer where we were welcomed by Nhat. We ordered the famous BBQ chicken, which is charged at 250,000VND (£7.71) per 1kg of the alive bird. There is an option for you to pick, catch and kill your own but we did the more practical option of having the owners do that part. We chose rice, morning glory and plenty of peanut sauce to go with our meal and then waited about an hour or so for it to cook. We were in no hurry as there are hammocks aplenty for lolling about in and a lovely pool for a refreshing swim. I noticed that they now offer to accommodate people who want to swim but not eat or drink for a fee of 50,000VND (£1.54). It’s still one of our all time favourites and we always love to see Nhat and her family as they are so lovely.
Instead of a cold beer, which I would normally have several of, I had a fresh coconut at 40,000VND (£1.23) and a litre of water at 25,000VND (77p). Multi came to join us but didn’t eat or drink any alcohol, he just had water and plenty of fags! By 12.45pm we were tucking in to a very tasty feast in a delightful place. Captain Caveman had several beers which are also 25,000VND (77p) each and are always very cold!

We left around 3pm and had to walk back over the scary bridge, where I proceeded to get my frock caught on the barrier rails and my hat nearly blew off. Greg had to unhook me and hold my dress from blowing on to the metal again. We dropped Captain Caveman off at Phong Nha Homestay on the way back to pick up bags and pay the bill. It was just 980,000VND (£30) for our 5 night stay, which was an absolute steal and I definitely wanted to stay there again.
I got dropped off at The Villas, where I had left Bluey, and I cycled on to Highway 20 Homestay. Captain Caveman drove his motorbike up and we were given the end triple room in the traditional wooden house. It was really lovely and had a bathroom lay out which meant the toilet didn’t get soaking wet when taking a shower (always a bonus).

That evening we had been invited to Mountain House for Amanda and Greg’s farewell dinner with the owners, Ai and Hoai. Tatas and a customer from Captain Caveman’s Son Doong trip were also invited. Ai had prepared a massive feast and An, her brother, was giving out the beers. He was shocked that I didn’t want a beer but Captain Caveman had brought some Jameson’s whisky and I brought my boozy fruitcake. The meal was good and the Aussies were sad to be leaving, especially as they didn’t want to go back to their stressful life back in Australia.
Unfortunately, I had a bad stomach around 10.30pm and had to leave all of a sudden. Knowing that I wouldn’t shit myself on a bicycle I sped off back to the homestay but as I got within a few metres, 5 dogs came running out at me. A local man on a motorbike saw me and parked to help me get to the gate, which was closed. When I got in to Highway 20, their own dog (which I didn’t know they had) came running out at me and was going mental. Vinh came out and told me if I say her name she would be friendly but I wasn’t convinced but she calmed down a bit to let me pass. I made it to the bathroom in time, only to be sat on the toilet when I noticed I had company!
A massive huntsman spider was within touching distance and I don’t like spiders at the best of times. I had the quickest visit I could in a spider occupied khazi and then had a lay down in the AC until Captain Caveman returned. It was late when he got back, he’d helped polish off the whiskey and I hoped he’d come to the rescue with the spider situation. That was not to be, as he encouraged the spider over to the shower area and named him Jeff.

Phong Nha – 21st April

On Sunday 21st April Captain Caveman was due out of Son Doong but I’d already arranged to see Amanda and Greg in the afternoon. For a late breakfast I had another fruit salad with yoghurt and granola from Tree House and 2 litres of water to set me up for the heat.
I’d been in touch with Bich to check it would be ok for the 3 of us to go to The Villas for lunch and then use the pool. I’d already mentioned this to Amanda and Greg, saying that if we were eating and drinking plenty they wouldn’t mind. When I arrived they were sat outside looking like 2 kids ready for a trip to the swimming baths. I laughed and then said we could go inside to eat. I asked how Amanda was after eating pork which she’s allergic to and she wasn’t too bad, considering. I ordered a mango lassi and a pho ga, while the Aussies decided to have fried spring rolls for Greg and fresh veggie ones for Amanda.
The rest of the afternoon was spent in the pool, talking to Multi and his kids who were also there to drink and use the pool. I had a soda water with ice and lemon then Captain Caveman arrived back from the cave and in desperate need of a beer and pizza. This year the boss had banned all alcohol on tours so Captain Caveman is often a smidge thirsty when he gets out after 4 days underground. I had a couple of white wines which are 90,000VND (£2.76) each. I’d only been in the pool once and Captain Caveman didn’t have his swimmers or time for a dip as he got picked up at 5.30pm to go to Chay Lap, we said we’d meet him in town later.

As decided yesterday, the Aussies and I went to Lantern restaurant for our dinner. I was happy to give it a try and I decided to see how the veggie Vietnamese pancake was. Amanda decided to order the same and a portion of onion rings. Greg wanted to compare dishes he’d had before so went for fried spring rolls and a pork noodle dish. My food was good but, if I’m honest, I preferred the one from Phong Nha Vegan.
After his gala dinner, Captain Caveman met us at Tree House for drinks where we had the following;
1 water 10,000
1 coke 15,000
1 Huda beer 20,000
1 ginger tea 30,000
1 watermelon juice 35,000
1 Mango Lassi 45,000
1 Strongbow cider 50,000
1 Carrot, Orange & ginger juice 60,000
Total spent 265,000VND (£8.17).
We said our goodnights as Amanda and Greg rode their borrowed bicycles back to Mountain House. Tomorrow was their last full day and night in Phong Nha, so we had plans.

Phong Nha – 19th & 20th April

I had a very busy day on Friday 19th April, it was also the day that our new Turkey tenants were moving in to Captain Caveman’s apartment. Jamie was picking them up from the airport and had agreed to buy them a welcome pack. He got the essentials like milk, bread, wine and beer which came to 700 lira (£17) and I transferred him the money straight away. I picked up the 4.7kg of laundry from Oxalis and paid the 141,000VND (£4.35) for it. I cycled back to The Villas where I had a pho ga (chicken noodle soup) and 2 cups of tea for breakfast, costing 120,000VND (£3.70). I’d posted the blog on my Facebook, where I mentioned about Captain Caveman’s contract with Oxalis coming to an end and it had got a bit lively with messages and comments – some of which I couldn’t answer the questions, as I didn’t know.

I met the Aussies at Phong Nha Vegan after I’d been back to the hotel to drop off the laundry. They were excited to have booked Hai’s Eco Tour for tomorrow and had invited me but I didn’t have the money, or the stamina to walk through the jungle looking for wildlife in this heat. I politely declined and we each ordered some food at Phong Nha Vegan for our lunch; I ordered the mushroom La Lot for the 3 of us to share and some fresh spring rolls, Greg ordered fried spring rolls, braised eggplant and steamed rice, Amanda chose the Banh Xero (Vietnamese pancake). We randomly ended up with a crispy veggie ramen dish which turned out to be one of my new favourites. I drank kumquat tea, my fellow diners had smoothies and I paid 200,000VND (£6.16) for my share of the bill. After our fantastic vegan lunch, the Aussies cycled off to their homestay and I mine but arranged to meet up later for dinner at The Villas.

I was still not tempted to drink alcohol so I just had a pot of tea and a margarita pizza for my dinner. It came to 200,000VND (£6.16) again and it was very good. It wasn’t a late night and I arranged to meet Amanda and Greg after they got back from their adventure tomorrow.

I had quite an easy day on Saturday 20th April, with being too poor and lazy to go on the day trip which the Aussies were on. I caught up on my blog and generally tried to keep out of the heat. I set the hotel room’s AC to 27°C to keep cool and drank lots of water to stay hydrated. For breakfast I had a lovely fruit bowl with yoghurt and granola/nuts from Tree House, then carried on doing some editing in there with a fan on. For lunch I had a soda water and a chicken fried rice which was excellent (I forgot the photo). My total bill came to 180,000VND (£5.55) for breakfast, lunch and a drink.
That afternoon, I got a message from the Aussies to say they were at Bamboo cafe, having just come back from the tour. I went to meet them and I had a fresh coconut. They didn’t have transport so decided to go straight out for food, rather than go back to shower, and they wanted my recommendations. The requirements were quite straight forward; Amanda can not eat fish or pork as it makes her ill and she wanted to eat street food, Greg said he’d try anything but both agreed it had to be Vietnamese. With only a week left here before being back in Sydney there was no point eating western food. I have never had street food in Phong Nha so I suggested a few places including the banh xeo, snails, baby birds and small restaurants around the market. I wasn’t certain if they would use pork products in their food but if Amanda stuck to chicken, snails or prawns she should be fine. As we walked past the Winmart and towards the market I mentioned that the pork place is good, but obviously not for Amanda. Greg was keen to try it and Amanda asked me if they did any other dishes, they do a good veggie and tofu soup. So in we went and I ordered the pork, rice, morning glory and omelette plate for 60,000VND (£1.85), Greg chose the pork noodle soup and Amanda’s choice was a bit of a surprise. She loves Banh Mi which is a pork sandwich and she decided to chance it and have the pork filled baguette anyway. When the food came, we all ate every bite and it was so delicious and cheap. Our total bill came to 240,000VND (£7.40) with a soft drink each. We ended up going in to Lantern restaurant for drinks after and the Aussies decided that we would eat at Lantern tomorrow as they had lots of Vietnamese dishes on the menu that they fancied.

Phong Nha – 18th April

I was feeling partially human on Thursday 18th April and had decided I was never drinking again. Captain Caveman was off in to the big cave so we were up early, having had a good rest at our latest accommodation, Phong Nha Homestay. We had 2 big double beds and a small balcony, overlooking the mountains and some wriggly tin. The bathroom was small but very functional and the place was super clean.

We went to Oxalis for breakfast where I had an orange juice and a bacon sandwich as I was hungry after hardly eating yesterday. I said goodbye to Captain Caveman who would be back out on Sunday afternoon. Almost instantly, I had a bad stomach and had to cycle back to the hotel. Luckily, I’ve found you can’t shit yourself on a bicycle so I was ok while ever I rode Bluey but it was touch and go in the supermarket. I had to leave promptly after buying sugar free milk, 5 Grains savoury biscuits and more tissues (I was still suffering with that cold from Hanoi) at a total cost of 90,000VND (£2.77).
That afternoon, I had a wedding to go to and the heat could not have been much hotter if it tried. I spent a couple of hours resting and blogging before I had to go but I really didn’t relish the temperature and humidity out there. Tatas had also arranged for a car to take the Aussies and her over to Phong Nha Farmstay for a pool afternoon and I had agreed to meet them there for dinner after the wedding.

Chung offered to give me a lift to the wedding at 3.30pm from outside my accommodation and we went with Ca Chua from Lantern restaurant and Moon from Funny Monkeys. On arrival, we met with Pe Map and Giang and we formed a girls only table. Lan looked fantastic and I was surprised that she wasn’t sweating as much as I was! I also didn’t have a nice dress to wear as they were all in the laundry at Oxalis so I wore one that had a nice colour, orange!
I was determined I wouldn’t be eating at the wedding as the outside temperature is certainly not conducive to the safe keeping of the food usually offered. However, with me being the only white Western woman on a table of friendly Vietnamese women, most of them mothers, I was not going to be able to do that! I was given prawns, chicken, beef stew and sticky rice, I voluntarily took a bread roll but managed to avoid any chillies or mystery food. I generously counted it as 10 syns, half expecting it not to stay in that long. There was no beer at our table, only water and Super Horse, until Hoan arrived and did a cheers. Chung took one for the team and I left with Moon, shortly after Giang had left. Vietnamese weddings are exciting for the first few times of going but I was really struggling to cope with an outdoor wedding in a mild heat wave.

Moon very kindly dropped me off at Phong Nha Farmstay and I headed over to the pool, where Tatas and the Aussies were having a dip. We all chatted and caught up with all the goings on, before ordering some dinner. Greg had got so drunk on Raki in Istanbul with our friend, Murat, that he was also never drinking again, Amanda didn’t drink but Tatas had a G & T for happy hour and a beer with dinner. I stuck to soda water with my beef in bamboo, Greg ordered the Nem Lui, Amanda thé Tofu curry and I think Tatas had a salad. The food was great and we had a good night, getting the taxi back around 10pm. My meal and drink came to 235,000VND (£7.24) but at the Farmstay they add service and tax on to the total bill. I spent 400,000VND (£12.33), which I gave to Tatas for my share of the bill and my taxi ride back with them. It had been an expensive but fun day and Tatas was off in to a cave tomorrow for 4 days, leaving me and the Aussies to have some fun until they left on Tuesday.

Hanoi to Phong Nha – 17th April

I think it’s fair to say that Wednesday 17th April could definitely have gone better! I was in a real tangle and could not function when Captain Caveman’s alarm went off at 6am. Our flight from Noi Ba airport in Hanoi left at 8.55am and Captain Caveman had to take one for the team and get me to the airport in my completely incapable state! He had left Lizzy’s key card at our reception when she had gone home without it and this caused some confusion with the receptionist. Captain Caveman had completely done the right thing getting to the airport earlier and by 7.30am I was checked in and lolling on a seat trying not to be sick or collapse. I don’t even remember leaving the hotel, the taxi ride to the airport or going through security. How Captain Caveman was functioning I do not know and, if it wasn’t for him, I would not have made it to the flight. Looking back I was still drunk as I’d had less than 4 hours of sleep and the most alcohol I’d drank since I missed my flight in Rhodes. I slept through the flight and was glad to get in to the Oxalis car at Dong Hoi airport. I was not so thrilled to be in the back of the pick up service for a customer who was quite sociable. Luckily, Captain Caveman was dealing with all the questions. We got to Phong Nha before midday and dropped me off at Phong Nha Homestay where we were staying for a few nights. I was so happy that the early check in was available and I got straight in to bed, only then realising I was still wearing last night’s clothes.
Captain Caveman had his Oxalis briefing at 6pm and, quite frankly, I was so glad it wasn’t me who had to work tonight – I was broken. I’d eaten nothing all day so I managed a full fat coke and some crisps. It was weigh day, obviously I didn’t get weighed as I’d barely made it through the day before I knew what day it was. I took my measurements to find there was no change to my bust or hips and 1cm off my waist. I counted the syns for last week, including what I’d had last night (using photos) and Captain Caveman’s rather observant memory – it was the most I’d had in months at 323 syns.
I went to sleep not even checking any of my messages or getting in touch with Amanda and Greg who had come to see us in Phong Nha for a week on their way back to Australia.

Photo credit – Captain Caveman

Phong Nha to Dong Hoi – 8th April

On Monday 8th April at 7am the humidity was over 80% and my weather app said it would rain. Captain Caveman was convinced it wouldn’t and that it would be fine until we left for Dong Hoi at 4.15pm. At 8am Captain Caveman went to the Glass House and Oxalis to do work related stuff on his day off.
At 10.30am I met Hoan and Chung at Phong Nha Vegan where I ordered the Vegan Pho for breakfast. What I didn’t realise is that I’d been invited to the communal lunch at 11am so I, obviously, didn’t join in on the food. I met the staff and established their ages so that I knew whether to call them em or chi. Yen, Thuong, Nhung, Ha, Thuong Hai and Phuong all introduced themselves. I didn’t meet Hanh, as she starts later in the day but I already knew her.

My next stop off was to The Villa’s to meet Captain Caveman, as we had 3 hours until our pick up car and Captain Caveman was peckish. He had lunch there and some drinks and, here’s what we had and the prices in Vietnamese Dong.

The Villa’s
2 cups of Jasmine tea 60,000
2 Huda beers 70,000
1 cheese & onion toastie 95,000
Total spent 225,000VND (£7.10)

Just as we were getting ready to leave to get back to Oxalis for the pick up car, it started to rain. I was wearing a low cut top so I got quite wet with no time to dry off as the driver was already early and waiting. I was cold in the car with the AC on and had to close the flaps for the 50 minute journey to the Minh Quang hotel in Dong Hoi. We got checked in to a nice room and were meant to be meeting Dung (aka Seven) and his family at Tree Hugger for dinner but he cancelled. I was looking forward to Tree Hugger so Captain Caveman and I went by ourselves. Unfortunately, Captain Caveman tried to order 2 meals which were both unavailable and he had to settle for fried spring rolls. I ordered the beef and vegetable stir fry with brown rice and we both had a white russian and then walked back to the hotel.
Here’s the prices at Tree Hugger, they do a great White Russian;

Tree Hugger
1 Fried spring rolls 50,000
1 beef and veg rice plate 65,000
2 White Russian cocktails 120,000
Total paid 235,000VND (£7.42)

I had another live session booked in, about running my own business, so Captain Caveman went to meet Stu at the Korean BBQ place. My stomach wasn’t good so it was an early night as we were off to the airport in the morning.

Phong Nha – 7th April

On Sunday 7th April I had been asked by Chung if I would like to meet with her and Hoan, the owner of Phong Nha Vegan, at 8am. There was a new coffee shop opening in Phong Nha and they wanted to go there. I left Captain Caveman in bed with instructions to try to get the room cleaned and see if we could stay one more night.
Hi Coffee looked very nice and they had a cute little dog. I had a herbal tea and, when my friends arrived, they also had tea or juice, not coffee. Today was the opening day so we were there early and it wasn’t too busy yet.
My next stop off was at Tree House for a smoothie bowl breakfast on my way to meet Veronika. I cycled in the warm sun to meet her at Lotus Cafe & Restaurant for our lunch. I ordered the chicken Luk Lak with steamed rice instead of chips and Veronika had the pork ribs with pickled mustard greens. Both dishes were delicious and the waitress gave us a free juice, I also completely forgot to take photos of our food. My meal was 90,000VND (£2.84) which was a good price for the portion size. After, I cycled back to Sunshine Homestay, in the sun, to see Captain Caveman.
Meanwhile, back in Turkey, the new rules about staying in a house where the owner wasn’t present were causing issues. It also meant I would no longer be able to pet sit for friends who were going on holiday in July, August or September, which was a bit of a problem for me, as we had tenants in Captain Caveman’s apartment until the end of September. It also meant I couldn’t stay at my parents’ place without them both being present unless I was able to prove I was related to them. Unfortunately, I still have an unrelated surname which would mean getting my birth certificate and marriage certificate, and I didn’t have them in Vietnam or Turkey. I’d not yet got the money together for my return flight either and needed to work out where I could stay until October, if I wasn’t allowed to pet sit in Turkey – another thing on the To Do list!
That evening, Captain Caveman and I cycled to Xin Chao for dinner where I had a really tasty chicken and vegetable fried rice and Captain Caveman ordered the meatball sandwich. We called in to The Villa’s for a cheeky nightcap on the way home. Tomorrow we were off to Dong Hoi in the afternoon so we both packed our bags ready for our next little adventure.

Phong Nha – 6th April

Even with Captain Caveman away, I was still awake by 7.30am on Saturday 6th April. I did some writing for my blog and generally lolled about until I realised I needed some breakfast. I wasn’t sure if Sunshine Homestay included breakfast but there was rarely anyone about. We’d been there 4 nights already and there was no sign of any cleaning of our room. I used Google translate to ask but I wasn’t sure if they understood. Bluey and I cycled in to town, as far as Tree House where I had a fruit salad with yoghurt and chopped nuts/seeds for breakfast. I also took my own Yorkshire tea bags and asked for some milk. When I paid the bill they only charged me for the fruit which was good of them as 80,000VND (£2.53) was fairly pricey for a breakfast in Vietnam.
Captain Caveman was due out this afternoon but would be going to his Gala dinner at Chay Lap tonight, Tatas was due back at 5.30pm. I kept myself free to meet either or both of them when they were available. For lunch I went to meet Chung at Phong Nha Vegan, but she was helping the staff in the kitchen. I tried the Vegan Banh Xeo, which is a rice flour pancake with tofu, mushroom and bean sprouts in, served with herbs and salad in rice paper rolls with a fake fish sauce dip. It was delicious and extremely filling. Just as I’d finished eating, Veronika messaged to ask if I fancied lunch with her at The Villa’s. Instead, she ate there and then came to meet me at the Vegan where she had a mango and coconut smoothie. I had a very refreshing iced kumquat tea as, despite the weather forecast of clouds and rain, it was quite hot and very humid.

I got back to Sunshine Homestay thinking I’d maybe have a little nannan nap but Captain Caveman was going to be back at the Glass House by 3pm. We were invited to Son’s house for a porter party at 3.30pm. I’m not usually keen on going to them as it’s lots of food which I can’t eat and warm beer with huge chunks of ice in – not my thing! Captain Caveman convinced me that it would be only for a couple of hours and he would bring a bottle of red wine for me, so I agreed. Captain Caveman and I were the first people there and we watched Son’s wife catering for the impromptu porter party with gusto. By 4.20pm I was a couple of glasses of wine in and was enjoying the BBQ pork and rice while Captain Caveman chugged beer with the boys and ate anything with chillies in. At the party there were Son, Lam, Gang, Hung, Cu Ba, a couple of other guys who’s names I didn’t catch and Bom later joined but only drank soft drinks. I was quite taken aback when Son passed round some Ferrero Rocher chocolates and I introduced them all to the making of a ring using the wrapper. As there’s not much English spoken, Gang was my translator and, after a pretend marriage ceremony, Captain Caveman got picked up for Chay Lap. Tatas said she was going to be late because she needed to do her exercises and tidy her room which was lucky, as Son and the remaining porters needed me to stay at their party. Everyone wanted a ring, except for Lam who was a firm no because he was already married and he did not want another wife – he was quite firm on this and I wasn’t sure if he was aware it was all make believe. Much hilarity and drunkenness followed until I finished my litre bottle of red and had to leave to meet Tatas.

Drunkenness at the Porter Party

Ferrero Rocher Rings

At The Villa’s Tatas had a margarita cocktail and a caesar salad while I had more red wine and a spaghetti bolognese. Captain Caveman joined us after his gala dinner, along with 3 Germans from Tatas’ last tour. More drinks were had with them, Captain Caveman ordered a pizza and our new friends insisted on paying for some of our drinks. We paid 344,000VND (£10.85) for our 2 meals and my glass of red wine which was a good deal. At 10pm, the Germans and Tatas were off to find a karaoke while a rather drunk Captain Caveman and I cycled back to Sunshine Homestay, where they still hadn’t cleaned the room or given us more than one towel! We only had one more night there so we’d survive. As I got in to bed I realised I’d missed a video call with my parents but hoped I’d catch up with them tomorrow.

Phong Nha – 5th April

I went to Oxalis early on Friday 5th April so that I could see Tatas before her 2 day Hang Va trip. She was tired and the bus hadn’t got in until gone midnight. I had a bacon sandwich and some green tea before picking up the laundry and cycling back to Sunshine Homestay.

It was a misty, humid morning but it was about to hot up so I agreed that Khanh Linh could pick me up for lunch. She drove us both to Bamboo cafe where she insisted on us having lime yoghurt drinks. I’d been brought up to never mix citrus and dairy in the belief that they curdle but that was not a rule that Vietnamese people held. It tasted good but I worried it would give me a stomach issue. We also shared fresh pork and prawn spring rolls and a mango salad with prawn crackers. It was all very nice but I had a bad stomach before we could leave the restaurant.

In the evening I took myself off for an early dinner at The Villa’s where I had a white wine and soda, smoked duck salad and a pizza. I was only on 7 syns for this week so it was time to treat myself and I only ate a bit of the pizza and took the rest home. I paid 385,000VND (£12.09) for a starter, main, and a wine and soda.
I did end up eating a bit more of the pizza before bed time though, as the fridge in the room was not on and had mould in it. Tomorrow, Captain Caveman was due out in the afternoon and he would have one day off before we went on another little jolly!

Phong Nha – 4th April

On Thursday 4th April I got an update from Tatas that she would be back in Phong Nha tonight, as there was no bus yesterday from her home town. Unfortunately, she would not be back until about midnight and was working tomorrow. I decided to take myself off to The Villa’s to catch up with some blogging. I had a fruit salad, yoghurt and muesli for breakfast with jasmine tea. I had a bee in my bonnet about the water bottles with filtered water in which sometimes harbour mould on the stoppers so I recommended to the staff that they clean them more. I didn’t drink the water out of the bottle they brought me because of this as my stomach was already delicate. I had pho bo (beef noodle soup) for lunch and then later a carrot, orange and ginger juice. I paid 220,000VND (£6.91) for breakfast, lunch and 4 drinks so that was quite a bargain.

After a rest at Sunshine Homestay, I got an invite to celebrate Chung’s birthday with her at a local Vietnamese restaurant, not far from Magic Fingers massage place. Chung gave me a lift but I had to carry 2 birthday cakes, one in each hand – a first for me on the back of a motorbike.
The party was good with lots of familiar faces as well as some new ones. I didn’t drink any alcohol, mainly because I no longer drink beer and I don’t like the rice wine. A lot of the food wasn’t suitable for me as it had seafood, innards and chillies in but Chung ordered veggie noodles and veggie fried rice for me, which was really nice.

Around 10pm there were swarms of flying ants which were a bit bothersome and I moved away from the table. Huong, from Jungle Boss, offered to give me a lift and I agreed to carry flowers and cake too. We went to karaoke and I even got persuaded to do a Britney Spears song. My battery on my phone died but I think I got in about 1am and Long, the owner of Sunshine Homestay, was surprised at my lateness. Huong gave me a lift as she was only round the corner and I couldn’t wait to get to bed.

joloyolo

The ramblings and observations of a fortysomething lady of leisure

Tag: phongnha