Sheffield – 18th July

It was Captain Caveman’s last full day with me in England on Thursday 18th July and it was also his birthday. I’d organised for us to celebrate later but he wanted to keep any plans casual which was proving a bit tricky. It was only 18°C at 9am as I had my tea and toast then got on with work for a couple of hours. Unfortunately, I had some bad news; my parents did not drink Yorkshire tea but I’d thought all this time that they did. They had been fans of Tetley it appeared and even had the Tetley teabags bought in bulk. It was a good job I’d brought my own, all the way from Vietnam and Turkey! Captain Caveman got all his stuff together and was leaving for London tomorrow afternoon by bus. Before midday we were bus wankers once again as we ventured in to town for some birthday fun. The bus fare from Mosborough to Sheffield city centre, which is 12km and takes about 20 minutes usually, cost us £2 each, one way. My parents had declined our invite to join us as they don’t like to go in to town if they can help it, even though they both have free bus passes, and they don’t particularly like to go out drinking in Sheffield these days. On the bus I got some messages and photos of the pool from Captain Caveman’s apartment complex which could’ve been taken on any given day and reused but he seemed to think he was on top of things now – I was still dubious. We got off the bus near the train station and headed to a cafe on Brown Street, I noticed Spearmint Rhino was no longer! I just had a soda water and Captain Caveman had a coffee as it was one of those fancy places that serves smashed avocado and I wasn’t keen so we didn’t stay. Instead we walked up towards The Moor where 2 sleeping tramps and a dog were almost blocking the door to Beres sandwich shop. We both had a pork sandwich and went to sit on a bench to eat it, as it was now sunny. My first pork sandwich since being back in England cost £3.60. It was so tasty and was another thing off our must do list. We walked through Leopold Square where Strada had now become another restaurant called Pho. I checked out the menu to find a Pho Ga (chicken noodle soup) was priced at a whopping £12.25 which, compared to £1.82 for a posh one in Victory Road Villas, Phong Nha, was absolutely shocking! We walked up West Street and along Division Street spotting new places like Glass Onion and Pieminister as well as old favourites The Frog & Parrot and the Devonshire Chippy. No cars are allowed on the road now so it seemed odd to see people sat outside the pub but on the road. There were a lot more drug addled homeless people around too, and I was shocked to see drugged up women who looked like they were desperate for a wash. At the clothing bank, I wondered why all the clothes were spread out on the floor but maybe it was for the homeless to be able to use them. As it was lunchtime on a Thirsty Thursday, we tried to go to a pub for a drink but not many were open, including another old favourite, The Bath, which didn’t open until 4pm – on a Thursday!! We unsuccessfully tried a couple of other pubs which were either not open, closed down or had the decorators in. The Forum was still going strong so we went in there but I just had a pint of water, which was completely free (more on that later) and Captain Caveman had a pint. We had a critter join us which I didn’t like but Captain Caveman persuaded me to be friends with it and we saved it by giving it some water, then it ended up in the hair of a recently graduated female with a partial tit hanging out. We decided to walk towards Kelham Island as, surely, pubs there would be open and it might be a bit more classy!?

Today was also the day of Captain Caveman’s friend’s funeral. Sid Perou, from England but living in Thailand, was a famous caver and filmmaker who had sadly passed away. We’d last met up with Sid, his wife and his grandson in May last year and he was a really fascinating and lovely man. Captain Caveman and I were of course upset by this news, Captain Caveman in particular, and he had planned to mark the evening by joining some cavers at The Cobden View pub. The Sheffield University Speleological Society (SUSS) meet there on a Thursday, right at the same time that I’d arranged a small gathering of friends to help Captain Caveman celebrate his birthday. We decided Captain Caveman would go to the Cobden View but I would go to meet everyone at Kelham Island. After the caving night, Captain Caveman would join us. In the meantime, we had stopped off at The Shakespeare for a pint on the way to Kelham Island, we both had a pint and a packet of Salt and Vinegar Discos to share. We had a walk round Kelham Island to find a few of the pubs were closed but we ended up in The Millowners Arms where I had another pint of water. I was feeling a bit dehydrated after last night and thirsty after walking in Sheffield which is far more hilly than I’m used to. To my surprise, the water was free again and I was absolutely loving being able to drink tap water whenever I liked – it was so amazing! Next, we decided to call in to the bar I had arranged to meet everyone in later tonight. I’d been to Salt before but it turned out that Captain Caveman hadn’t, as we ordered 2 on-tap cocktails for a total of £12.30. My Pornstar Martini was a bit too sweet but Captain Caveman’s Espresso Martini went down well. We also tried a gyoza snack for £4.50 which was tiny but tasty.
Our next stop ended up being Craft & Dough with other choices not being open and Captain Caveman was getting a bit peckish. We decided to order a pizza to share and he had another pint of beer while I went to the loo. When I came out I went to order a pint of water and asked the barman how much it was. I never knew this but, all licensed premises in England and Wales are required by law to provide ‘free potable water’ to their customers upon request. He explained that it was illegal not to give free tap water out when asked and I was so impressed with this law. I also ordered a beer as I thought it was a good idea and we were going to be meeting a few people who were finishing work soon.

Captain Caveman and I met Tony and Paul first at 6pm at the Kelham Island Tavern. Tony was drinking from a glass labelled Left Handed Giant which might be his new nickname. Becca was also already there just as we arrived as she’d got an Uber in to town. As we tried to work out how long it had been since our last rendezvous (too long!) and who knew who from where, the beers flowed. Luan, Drexy and Jeff arrived as Captain Caveman left to go to the SUSS meet up. More reminiscing and laughter was had before we realised we needed to change venues to meet anyone else at Salt. Becca and I left first as Louisa and Linda were already sat outside and I almost didn’t recognise them as both had different hairstyles since I last saw them. Louisa was working later so couldn’t stay out long but had made the effort for Captain Caveman’s birthday, I hoped he would make it back before she had to leave. To complete the crew, Caz & Tim were next to arrive and we had a drink or two more. I felt that I didn’t get to speak to everyone enough and it dawned on me that the time I planned to be in England for would fly by. It was the school holidays so lots of parents were busy with the kids or going away so it wasn’t possible for everyone to come out, just because JoLo was back in town. As we were chatting, Luan informed us that one of our friends’ father had died. But then when she double checked it was a false alarm and we all raised a glass to him, with Linda saying ‘I’ve never met him, but I’m so glad he’s alive!’ It was nice to be with my Northern mates again and we had a great time. As I said bye to Louisa and Linda, Captain Caveman was in the taxi coming back – which was a shame they had missed each other.

We had another drink in Salt but then decided to go back to The Kelham Island Tavern. Caz and Tim also had to get back home so they said their goodbyes. Much to Captain Caveman’s aversion to acknowledging his birthday, he responded quite well to a group rendition of ‘Happy Birthday’ from the rest of us in our last bar. Drexy and Jeff had offered to give Captain Caveman and I a lift back to Mosborough and the sensible thing would’ve been to take it. Luan and Paul also had work tomorrow so were leaving but I blame Tony for the rest of the evening’s shenanigans.

I don’t think Captain Caveman was expecting for it to be such an eventful (drunken) birthday on Thursday 18th July. Tony had the amazing idea that we should all go for a curry. Once we’d said bye to the people our hangovers would be wishing we were tomorrow, I called Butler’s Balti to ask them to stay open. Tony is a regular there so they agreed to wait for us but we took longer to walk there than we expected because of all the road work paraphernalia in the way. Once there, we were the only customers; Tony, Becca, Captain Caveman and I were so grateful, though, and we cracked on with ordering our drinks and food quite sharpish. Tony and I had red wine, Becca had white and Captain Caveman stuck to beer (for the time being). I’d love to write about what each of us ordered but all I can recall is that it was amazing food and that Captain Caveman and Tony went for something too hot for me to handle. At the end of the night, and as the staff were probably really hoping to lock up, Captain Caveman was presented with the ultimate birthday drink. Of course, I had to get a video of it which, to Captain Caveman’s irritation, caused a bit of an injury. While I videoed and we all sang Happy Birthday in the style of Stevie Wonder on a night out in Sheffield, Captain Caveman had to wait to blow out the flaming sambuca which then meant he burned his lip on the hot glass and lethal liquid. Outside we struggled to get taxis for 3 out of 4 of us and we were a bit merry by this stage. Becca got upset as her taxi got nicked by someone else and Captain Caveman got impatient when we ordered a second one as ours went missing. Poor Tony was left to sort us all out and make sure Becca got the taxi and he got back to his hotel. All this on a school night but we were home before 1am and our friendly taxi driver was chatting all the way back to Mosborough to his friend abroad. It only cost £16 which I didn’t think was bad considering it was probably about that 2.5 years ago. What a night, tomorrow was going to hurt but I’d fortuitously took the day off work.

Photo Credit – some photos supplied by the

Kendal to Sheffield – 17th July

Josh and Martha had weighing scales in their bathroom and it was my weigh day on Wednesday 17th July. I’d consumed just shy of 500 syns this week, but I kidded myself that at least I was still tracking it! I do realise that simply writing it down doesn’t make me lose weight, eating and drinking less does! According to these scales I had put on 0.85kg (1.9lb) which wasn’t great but my measurements weren’t too bad; bust +1cm, waist stayed the same and hips -1cm!
We let down our trusty inflatable borrowed bed, which had been comfy, and tidied the room. With everything packed it was time to say bye to Martha as Josh gave us a lift to Oxenholme train station on his way to work. We had spent the last 2 days having lots of laughs and it was definitely one of the things I loved most about being back in England – spending time with friends who had a great sense of humour and banter. I don’t get as many opportunities to do that in Vietnam due to the language barrier and my comedic style being somewhere between Sid James and Jimmy Carr.
My concerns about gaining weight were soon forgotten (again) as we arrived at the cafe outside the station. We’d said a hurried farewell to Josh with hopes of seeing him and Martha in Turkey this winter and had a little bit of time before our train at 9.14am. Captain Caveman had already booked our train tickets in advance and we were going via Manchester Piccadilly to Sheffield, hoping to arrive around midday. Captain Caveman ordered a toastie and I had a bacon sandwich with brown sauce. The cafe there is excellent and my bacon sandwich was so good!!

The train to Manchester was fine, although someone was sat in our allocated seats, a lady who I thought was rather mentally challenged as she kept talking to herself, even while she was shovelling a flapjack in to her mouth. She also was speaking in a tongue I had no knowledge of and I tried to guess where she might be from. When we got off at Manchester Piccadilly to change trains, Captain Caveman pointed out she was Glaswegian and had airpods in her ears – earphones without wires! Wow, I was so out of touch and then Captain Caveman called me racist because I didn’t recognise a Scottish accent – while we were stood next to lots of people with different skin colour to me! The train to Sheffield was rammed and we only just got a seat with it being a free for all and Captain Caveman making a passenger move her bags from the seat next to her so that I could sit down. She said she couldn’t move them because she had recently had spinal surgery and that was no issue for Captain Caveman as he bunged them on the overhead rack. I assured her he would get them back down for her when we got off, as I sat down.
We arrived in Sheffield at 11.45am and my first activity was to need the toilet at platform 8! By 11.55am we were outside at the bus stop waiting for our bus to Mosborough and it was sunny! I wouldn’t have said it was hot but a workman on his lunch break obviously would have, as he came and did pull ups on the bus shelter while half naked. Our Giffgaff SIMs were now working so Captain Caveman didn’t notice as the workman got down on the floor and did press ups. I warned my parents we were on the way to their’s and we booked the family in for celebratory drinks tonight.

We arrived at Ma & Pa’s to warm hugs and they had even got us the kettle on and some nice food in for lunch. There were sandwiches with ham or pork, crisps, sausage rolls and scotch eggs. They were snaffled down very quickly and I didn’t even take a photo. After a bit of unpacking and repacking, all 4 of us decided it would be a good idea to go for a stroll to the nearest boozer. We love the Alma and it’s beer garden is often full of dogs with their owners. It was pretty quiet as we drank our pints. Captain Caveman and Mom stuck to beer but Dad and I had Inches cider. It was my first time of trying it and I really liked it, we commented that the glasses were nice and instantly went on to the barmaid’s watch list as she had noticed quite a few go missing already. We had pork scratchings even though we had plans for a dinner that Captain Caveman and I had been counting down to. I’d not been to Tony’s fish and chip shop for 2.5 years and it was at the very top of my list of must do places while I’m back. My parents were up for it and after a couple of rounds we left the Alma and went to the best chippy in Sheffield. Captain Caveman ordered himself a haddock, the rest of us had cod and shared two lots of chips between us. I was surprised to find that a fish was now over £6 so the whole lot came to over £40 for our dinner but it was so worth it and I could’ve eaten even more. Tony’s rarely disappoints and I hoped I’d get to go there again while I was back home – the diet could wait! In one day, I’d consumed over the weeks allowance of syns already and we still had a night out planned.

I’d booked a table at the local micro pub, Craftworks on the Mosborough high street, for 7.30pm. The motley crew joining Captain Caveman and I were my parents, my sister Gayle, my 2 nieces Morgan and April and Harley, April’s boyfriend. I went on to the red wine as I was full after the ciders and fish and chips, Captain Caveman stuck to pints, as did Ma, Pa & Harley. The ladies went a bit fancy with Aperol spritz or spirits and we gave the ball a right old kick. To give an idea of costs, pints of beer ranged from £3.90 for a Barnsley bitter or a weak pale ale, right up to over £7 for something stronger or a stout. My mom was better behaved than her last family visit here and I’m happy to report that she didn’t inspect the walls or floor this time – she knew that Neil (my brother-in-law) wasn’t here to come and rescue her this time. It was a brilliant way to celebrate Captain Caveman’s birthday early with the family and my face ached from laughing so much, especially at Gayle who is hilarious (even when she’s not trying to be). My nieces are now adults and I was kindly invited to a party next week to celebrate April turning 18. I’d not seen them since they came to Dalyan on holiday last year so it was brilliant to see them again. It was the first time I’d met Harley and we liked him straight away when we found out he was a fan of a music quiz! We were obviously the last to leave and at 11pm we were still all supping our last drinks as the really polite barmaid waited patiently for us to go home. Captain Caveman and I loved it and it was his first visit to Craftworks but maybe not his last.

Phong Nha – 1st & 2nd May

Another relaxing day was had by Captain Caveman and I on Wednesday 1st May. I’d been away from Dalyan for over 7 weeks now but we were looking at the option of me staying in Vietnam for another 2 months. I still didn’t have a flight booked but my parents, sister and brother-in-law would be on their way to Istanbul tomorrow. I was missing Dalyan and my friends there, a few of which had kept in touch which was nice. I was definitely missing Fat Club and the accountability it gave me although I was still trying my best to track everything and make sensible choices. This week I’d only consumed 208 syns, more than 100 less than last week, and only 78 on alcohol. Today was weigh day and the 8th Fat Club I’d missed but I took my measurements. I had lost 3cm from my bust, 1cm from my waist and 4cm from my hips. I was pleased because I was under or on target for all of my measurements now. I decided I would find some scales when I next went in to town as it was almost a month since I’d got weighed.
At 8am it was 33°C and it didn’t feel unbearable as we popped our swimmers on to go down for breakfast. I had veggie noodle soup with extra greens and a cup of Yorkshire tea, Captain Caveman had an omelette with plenty of coffee. We spent the morning by the pool but at noon I got some bad news; our tenants back in Dalyan (and Jamie’s friends from his home town) were complaining about Captain Caveman’s apartment. The pool there wasn’t ready, as promised, the sunbeds and decking areas were untidy and someone on the complex was feeding lots of cats. Jamie had messaged me to tell me of his friend’s complaints with photos and to inform me that the pool wasn’t even full of water yet. He said it was hot there and they would not be happy to be without a pool when it was promised. Just what we needed, especially when I had been told by our pool and garden guy that it would be ready in plenty of time. I messaged the agent and our pool and garden man with the complaints and photos. I also let Amanda and Greg know as they had guests renting their place downstairs. Captain Caveman went in the pool at Greenfield, while I continued to try to sort all the issues out in Dalyan.
We had lunch at Greenfield which was a really nice beef and vegetable stir-fry (without chillies for me). I eventually got some time to myself and for a swim before going back to the room to speak to a friend. Unfortunately, she had some bad news about her health, and she needed surgery. This meant that her plans to come visit us would be delayed or cancelled.
In the evening, Captain Caveman drove us both in to town via the pharmacy. They had a set of old style weighing scales and I got on to find I was the same weight as when I last got weighed. I was still 3.3kg (7.7lb) heavier than when I last got weighed on Carol’s scales though, which I wasn’t convinced was true. I went to Phong Nha Vegan for 2.5 hours and the chef made me Com Suon which is fake pork with steamed rice and vegetables. She added a couple of spring rolls and I gave one to the waitress. The food was delicious and very filling. We left at 8.30pm and drove the 8km back to Greenfield as I had a video call booked in with Ma & Pa. I had one glass of wine at the bar and left Captain Caveman having a beer with René while I did the call. My parents were excited to be going back to Turkey and had a week in Istanbul before heading to Dalyan. It was good to see their happy faces as Ma got the hang of the camera angle this time.

We had the same breakfast as yesterday on Thursday 2nd May at Greenfield Ecostay. It was a bit muggy so I also drank a litre of water and we shared some mangosteen. While Captain Caveman played Bridge on his iPad, I cycled in to Phong Nha by myself. This was great as it meant that Captain Caveman had not been in to work on his day off for 3 whole days and it was doing him good. I spent a couple of hot and sticky hours at the Vegan with the girls and a couple of dogs where I had the amazing fresh spring rolls. I took half of them with me when I left as it looked like rain may come. At 4pm I had a video call scheduled in with Vanessa which I wouldn’t have time to cycle the 8km back for in time. We had already had to move it twice because of me being unavailable so I decided I would call in to The Villa’s and call from there. I mentioned to Vanessa a storm was looking likely and that I couldn’t speak for long. I had a soda water and a cheese toastie as I was peckish which I ate while on the call. It was good to catch up but we had to cut it short at only 34 minutes, for me to attempt to get back before the rain.
Of course that did not happen and I got absolutely soaked to the skin. I tried to take a short cut and ended up pushing Bluey up a muddy hill and, for the first time in weeks, I felt cold.
When I got to Greenfield, looking like I’d just got out of the shower with my clothes on, I should have gone to have a hot shower and take my clothes off. I didn’t, instead I joined Captain Caveman, Multi and René at the bar with a generous glass of red wine and then shared the fresh spring rolls with the guys. I finally showered and noticed my thighs were chafed from cycling in the rain in flimsy shorts. I ended up drinking a bottle of red wine and ate my delicious dinner. Ngan had prepared meatballs with veggies, steamed rice, peanuts and beef Lalot with water melon for afters and I really enjoyed it.

Dalyan – 11th & 12th February

There was another walk planned on Sunday 11th February which I was looking forward to. I hadn’t eaten since lunch yesterday but I was starting to feel better. I had a couple of bananas to give me some energy but didn’t bother with any tea. Luckily, I was walking with Christine who has a bad knee so she goes at a similar pace to me. She and I only managed 2 hours, there was a bit of rain and we were struggling to keep up with the others. Very kindly, Christine gave me a Slimming World skinny bar which I had when I got home with my cup of tea.
Vanessa and Matt were coming round for Sunday lunch which had kind of happened by accident. Initially I had invited Kaan over, thinking we would be able to have a video call with Captain Caveman and Caroline who were celebrating Tet together. When I’d realised the etiquette of not having a single Turkish man in the house with just me, I’d roped in Vanessa. She had not only agreed but had also said she would cook the chicken and bring it over with some Yorkshire puddings. When I let Kaan know, he cancelled as he had some business he needed to attend to in Fethiye. I did the carrots, cabbage, potatoes, pumpkin, brussel sprouts and stuffing. I’d got some gravy but when Vanessa and Matt arrived she had brought some homemade gravy too. What a treat, I poured us some fizz to start, then we went on the white wine with our very delicious meal. Vanessa and Matt left so that she could have her family chat but, by this time, Jamie and Geoff had stopped by for a bevvie. Not being one to miss a party, Vanessa promised to come back after the chat.
Jamie and I had wine, Geoff had his own beers and we caught up on what the two of them had been up to. Vanessa came back and the 4 of us had a great night, drinking until about 11pm. At midnight I was in bed when Captain Caveman sent me a photo of him and Caroline and I told him Kaan cancelled on us.

I was getting quite used to not working on a Monday but on Monday 12th February I had some decisions to make about work. I had a bigger breakfast than usual with 2 slices of wholemeal toast, 2 cheese triangles, a banana and I used the last Yorkshire tea tea bag! It was a tough day but I put on my big girls pants and got on with it. I went to the bank to ask about various ways of getting Euros cash in to my Turkish bank and they were very helpful. My local bank can take Western Union payments, which I know they have a branch of in Rhodes Town.
I decided to go for a little walk around Dalyan before lunch time. Lunch was more of the tomato and lentil soup with pasta in and lots of water. I spoke to Captain Caveman who was off to his briefing and would be in the cave again tomorrow.
At 4pm I went to meet Vanessa and Matt at Tez bar for their farewell drinks. They were off back to the UK tomorrow and I might not see them until the summer.
I had a soda water at Tez bar which was only 20 lira (52p), some bars were now charging 3 times that. Wolfie and Rey were there, who I’d not seen in a while as they’d been back in the UK.
At 6pm we went to Ozzy’s where I treated myself to a chicken pizza and 2 wines. The pizza was amazing so my well intended plan of eating half and taking the rest home, went out of the window. We had a good night in Ozzy’s, even Jamie and Geoff (with Norman and Edna) popped to say bye to Vanessa and Matt which was really nice. My bill including a tip and just 2 wines came to 600 lira (£15.46) which I thought was reasonable. Back home, I had a ginger tea and watched some Netflix before bed and a huge storm.

Dalyan – 24th & 25th July

By 9am on Monday 24th July I was off to the bank to draw out more cash. I’d promised to pick up 3 boxes of baklava for Morgan and April to take home as gifts. I got it fresh from the bakery and went for the medium sized boxes, hoping they weren’t already over their weight allowance on hand luggage as it was very heavy. When I arrived, Gayle was still tidying, Neil was moving stuff downstairs and the girls weren’t quite ready. They had all kindly left me some spare toiletries and food which Gayle had bagged up for me. She also mentioned there was ice-cream and wine in the fridge, including the remaining half bottle from yesterday that I’d taken over. In the kerfuffle of them leaving, moving luggage and me getting the bag of gubbings, we left without the ice-cream and wine!
We had hugs, said our farewells and I was genuinely sad to see them leave. It had been lovely to share a big part of their family holiday and we’d had so many laughs. I was going to miss them a lot and the itinerary plans! If you think I’m funny, you should meet my sister – she really is hilarious! I waved Fikri’s taxi off with tears in my eyes and then walked back to mine.
I worked from 1pm to 7.30pm with a break for food and I decided I needed to spend the next week getting back to the Slimming World plan and saving money for my next adventures. I made a diet friendly pizza for dinner and had a much needed early night.

Tuesday 25th July was a quiet day for me in Dalyan. I’d been in communication with Steve and Michelle in Lardos who had managed to go back to check on things but it was still pretty horrendous over there.
I got up late, ate fruit with quark for brunch and worked from 12.30 until 8.30pm with a break in the middle to chat to a drunken Captain Caveman in Vietnam. I ventured out to buy a replacement water for 40 lira (£1.20) but the guy forgot to bring it round and I had to chase him. I had a chicken and veggie wrap for dinner with some Airfryer chips. I’d not even counted my syns this week but tomorrow I had to face Carol’s scales at Fat Club. I was bound to have put weight on but I was determined to get back on it.

Dalyan – 21st July

I was lucky enough to be invited on an amazing private boat trip on Friday 21st July. After a gap in the itinerary had presented itself, Neil had decided he’d quite like to enjoy some time with just the family, out at sea. The 4 of them had asked me to join their full day and evening on the Princess of Ekincik boat, which they had managed to book for exclusive use at the last minute. We were bright eyed and bushy-tailed, ready to set sail, at 10am. We had tea/coffee and biscuits while Captain Ismail took us out towards the Devil’s Bay area. Our first swim stop was lovely and the water felt amazing in our deserted little bay.

Our lunch had some of the best tasting mezes I’ve had this year and they took in to account all our allergies and requirements. The meat was top quality and the hygiene second to none. We had an absolute feast of a BBQ lunch and we were all stuffed. We set sail just as the sea got choppy and I had to take a sea sickness pill (just as a precaution). Captain Ismail was very adept at getting us through the fairly choppy sea and he sailed further out and then across to save us getting too disturbed as we lounged and sipped on iced tea or rosé wine.

It was getting quite hot and a tad humid as we got to the next swim stop which had crystal clear deep water. We were the only ones there, at 5pm, because most boats were on their way back from the day trips and the moonlight ones were not out yet. I felt so lucky that we could do this on such a lovely boat, great setting and one of the best crews in Dalyan.

By 6pm we were making our way to Little Dalyan, behind the beach, where we would stay for our last swim stop, dinner, sunset then stargazing. Neil and Gayle had a walk across the beach to the sea, the girls went paddle boarding and then we tried our luck at crab fishing. I’ve never been a fan and have thought it cruel however I did catch 3! Neil, being the fisherman of the family, caught the most.

As we watched the sun go down, we ate a delightful chicken casserole with rice, salad, bread and the BBQ crab. It was my first time eating crab and I was a bit concerned in case I was allergic to it. Ismail showed us how to get the meat from the shell and he opened mine for me. It was so fresh and tasty with no allergic reaction. There was lots more rosé wine had and we all loved the trip.

We got back to Dalyan after 10pm and, as we sailed in, the air felt very different than it had out at the beach. It seemed to be several degrees hotter and very suffocating, we all noticed it and started to sweat straight away. The humidity levels had increased and, despite there being no sun, the temperature seemed to be extreme for an evening. We paid our bills, said our thanks and goodbyes to Ivona, Ismail and Ege – we knew this wouldn’t be the last trip with them this year!

Dalyan – 15th July

On Saturday 15th July we had entered a heatwave coming from Morocco and were advised by the authorities to stay indoors during the daylight hours. Of course, we decided to ignore that and actually it didn’t feel quite as hot as Vietnam so I was doing ok.
I decided to go to the market in the midday sun, which is about a 15 minute stroll away. I had my sunhat on and took water with me. On the way I saw the homeless guy, wearing black and looking very warm. I bought him a peach and some water and helped him wash the peach. The market had been exceptionally empty when I got there at about 12.30pm so it was easy to grab what I needed and get back home quickly. I bought cherries, peaches, courgettes, aubergines, carrots and mushrooms so spent less than 200 lira easily. On the way back, I called in to Bim supermarket where I picked up a loaf of bread and a pack of nan bread for just 27.50 lira (82p). I noticed they had air fryers in for 1800 lira (£54), a few people from Fat Club were in to them so I was tempted and I know my mom fancied one.

By 2.30pm my mom and I were back in Bim on Atatürk Road buying the last air fryer then over to the other Bim in the Turkish quarter to buy another one. They were reduced to 1699 lira (£50.76) so we decided to get one each. The bank had been out of order, I only had card so my mom paid for both. They weren’t heavy but in the heat it was hard to walk about carrying the bulky boxes. It was unfortunate that my parents wouldn’t get to try it out just yet, though, as they were leaving late tonight, going back home to England.

That night we decided to celebrate in style and had booked a table for the 7 of us at Bistro Blue, one of our favourite restaurants. Beforehand, we met at one of my parents’ new favourites, Tapa, for drinks. I called at the bank to find that they were temporarily limiting withdrawals to 250/300 lira which is less than £10 per time so it was taking ages for people to get enough money out and it was all in small denominations – I’ve never had so many 10 lira (30p) notes!
The drinks at Tapa aren’t the cheapest in town but, despite it’s river location, it is also not the most expensive. The wine is a good one, Angora, for 95 lira (£2.84) per glass. A Turkish cider cost 150 lira (£4.48) which I don’t think is worth it so I no longer drink cider in Turkey. Our drinks bill came to 1,380 lira (£41.23) for 10 drinks, including 4 ciders, 4 pints of Efes and a Tequila Sunrise, which was definitely cheaper than what my family would have paid back in Sheffield.

At Bistro Blue we all had starters and main courses, including prawns, mushrooms, liver & onions, fish and steaks washed down with several wines. It was delicious and an excellent choice for celebrating my parents’ last night. We even splashed out on a couple of the bottles of nice wine with it being a special occasion, the end of my parents’ holiday and the last time we’d probably all be together for a while. The food and service was as lovely as always and I really enjoyed my pepper steak, my parents had their last fix of liver and onions which got great reviews too. Annie & Selahı made sure we gave Ma & Pa a good send off and we all had a cheeky amaretto for our farewell drink.

After seeing our parents off, and trying not to cry, the rest of us went for another drink at Tapa where Gayle tried one of the new marshmallow martini cocktails which was a bit like a dessert and Morgan had a daiquiri. It had been a great night and I was looking forward to putting my feet up for a bit of a rest tomorrow, but of course I had another event to attend.

Dalyan – 4th May

I got up before 9am on Thursday 4th May and made myself a cup of Yorkshire tea then checked my messages. My Mom hadn’t messaged yet but they might still be on English time and were 2 hours behind. The rain was heavy and it wasn’t the best weather for my parents to be welcomed in. I logged on to my emails and sent my invoice for payment to my boss. I didn’t have breakfast as I thought my parents might be hungry and up for meeting for food, especially as they wouldn’t have got any shopping in yet. I went to the shop to order more water and generally pottered about but by midday I was hungry and still hadn’t heard from Ma & Pa. I ate a small bit of courgette tortilla from the fridge and I’d got a beef stew out of the freezer for dinner.
At 1pm my Mom messaged to see if I’d got up yet, as she’d thought I’d still be in bed with a hangover. They popped over to mine, it was good to see them and I made cups of Yorkshire tea for us all. They had already had quite a busy morning; shopping, getting the internet put back on and a breakfast at Ela’s Kitchen (when the rain came down hard). If only I’d known I’d have joined them at my favourite place for breakfast. After drinking tea, my parents went back to their place to drop their shopping off and we arranged to meet again later. The Bengisu Boys were playing at the Jazz Bistro bar tonight and they had an open mic as their support so I was really looking forward to it.
Having eaten very little all day, I was ravenous so I ate my beef stew and then had cream crackers with cheese, cheese spread, gherkins and beef bacon. I needed to line my stomach but be fairly healthy as tonight I was wearing Carol’s size 12 dress for the first time out in public. I didn’t wear the heels as it was raining and I knew I’d be dancing, instead I wore my £1 Primark flipflops which Daisy had got me.
My parents and I sat at a table quite near the front and we asked for a menu to check prices of the drinks. They didn’t have draft beer on but an Efes bottle was 100 lira (£4.08) on the menu, which was a bit pricey. Ramazan came to take our order and told us that because the band was playing for free tonight a beer would only be 70 lira (£2.86) which was more reasonable. The various support acts, including Daisy, were all really good and entertaining. The place really filled up and the staff were definitely overstretched – it took ages to get served and they ran out of beer. Most of Mark and Kate’s table left earlier because of that which was a shame. Like an idiot, I had forgotten my phone so I was unable to take photos of us or the band. I did ask a friend to take some but they weren’t the best! I met a girl in the toilet queue who I recognised as Fatma, the Algerian waitress from Heybe during a power cut a year ago. She was amazed that I remembered her because of her ghost story she told me, Louisa, Linda and Alex. She got up and did a few songs and played guitar – she was very good too. It was a great night and all 3 of us were on the dancefloor giving the ball a kick! When we came to pay the bill we’d had 12 beers between the 3 of us which wasn’t bad. We decided to have ‘one more drink’ in Sofra bar after, as you do! When I got home, and after dancing like a woman possessed, I was hungry. I’d got half a Lukka Sunday dinner out of the freezer for tomorrow which I warmed up and had with Oxo gravy at 3.45am.

Photo credit – Bengisu Boys, various

Dalyan – 3rd May

It was Fat Club day again on Wednesday 3rd May and what a day it would turn out to be for my last Wednesday in Dalyan. It was less than 13 hours until my parents landed at Dalaman airport, less than 4 days until I would be on my way to Rhodes and 10 days until I arrived in Ho Chi Minh city, Vietnam, to meet Captain Caveman.
I took my measurements; I’d lost 2cm from my bust, 1cm from my hips but my waist (where I needed to lose it the most) had stayed the same. In another last ditch attempt to lose weight today I did 70 seconds squat, 90 seconds plank, 30 crunches and 20 leg lifts – it was very difficult! For breakfast I only had chickpea biscuits and courgette tortilla with a cup of Yorkshire tea. At 12.30pm I had an appointment with Emrah, my hairdresser, for a cut, colour and styling. I ended up having my hair washed by Mehmet instead of one of the girls, as it was busy and he did a great job. After finishing my hair, Emrah took a few photos for me and I couldn’t help thinking that Edna would be pleased I still had the cavalier look to match her.

I decided I would wear one of my newly acquired dresses to Fat Club as I had a feeling I’d be going out after, to meet the pool gang for the last time in a while.
When I got on Carol’s scales I had lost 0.5kg (1.1lb) so I was pleased with that. I had now lost 8.2kg (18lb) in total and it was definitely noticeable. I got a lift round to Rehab bar with Carol where I proceeded to have 2 celebratory draft beers. I bumped in to Dan, who I’d played pool with before, and he was having a daiquiri at the bar. He’d gone for a red fruit one to detract from his rather pink and painful looking sunburn. Carol and I joined Kate, Pamela, Gareth and Julie, sat outside Rehab until the sun went in. Carol was a bit giddy at how much weight I’d lost and insisted we took photos in the street. Kaan, the Tequila boat captain, stopped by to say hello and liked my new leopard print dress and my new weight loss, he even asked if I still had a husband! I obviously let him know I was still very much with Captain Caveman and was off to see him soon. After getting chatting to Gareth and Julie I was almost late for my next engagement of the day. I had been invited by Ann to her daughter, Jacqueline’s birthday celebration at Sofra bar and I was looking forward to it.

I joined Ann, Jacqueline, Lee, Jamie and Drew at Sofra bar for birthday celebrations at 7.30pm. My parents were currently on their flight to Dalaman and would arrive in a couple of hours but planned to go straight to their apartment. Jacqueline and Lee had flown in from Manchester earlier today and Ann had organised a cake from Louize as a surprise. I wasn’t going to have any cake due to the fact that I was meant to be on a diet but I was ‘forced’ in to it and it’s one of the best ones of Louize’s I’ve had. I had picked up Daisy’s sunglasses when I left Rehab bar, and had them in my bag. She messaged to ask the whereabouts of them which gave me the idea to send her photos of everyone around me wearing them. My reply to Daisy being ‘do you mean these?’ Even the staff, the dogs (including a stray that wanted in on the fun), and some other friends got involved. Şükrü made Jac do a birthday shot with him and she chose apple sourz! By 10.30pm the birthday celebrations were over and everyone paid up and got ready to leave. I, on the other hand, and not had my hair done and put a frock on for me to go home early. My Mom had messaged to say they had arrived but weren’t coming out as they were tired from travelling. Mom said she would message tomorrow so we could finally see each other again.

I went to meet Wendy, from Sheffield, and friends in Rodrigo’s bar and ended up giving the ball a right kick with Wendy, Jackie, Turgay, Kirsty, Sally, Sandra, Mal, Alice, Savaş and Ozzy. It must have been about 3am when we got turfed out and made our way home.
I didn’t cook myself any random meals when I got in but I did set my alarm so that I’d be up and ready to see my parents in the morning.

Dalyan – 5th February

It was very cold when I got up at 7.30am on Sunday 5th February. Norman and Edna were still snoozy and Little Ted had slept longer than yesterday. Teddy was a bit overexcited to see me and accidentally caught my lip with his mouth when he was trying to give me kisses. It hurt but it didn’t draw blood so I thought I’d be ok.
While I had my cup of tea, all 3 dogs wanted cuddles and they had to share me, begrudgingly. Norman, Little Ted and I were all squeezed in to the arm chair where the dogs had a nice little nap. I didn’t have chance for any breakfast! Every time Norman snored, Little Ted raised his head in a disapproving manner which was funny.

I decided to try walking all 3 of the dogs together but when I went to get my shoes I’d made a massive error. I’d left them out and at some point, Teddy had chewed them. Luckily I had brought another pair of shoes with me as I had an important lunch date that I didn’t want to miss. The walk with 3 dogs was hilarious and I looked like I was going to get tangled up at one point. I’m sure I heard Edna say to Norman ‘Come back, Charlie’. Little Ted was just happy to be out with his new pals and wanted to jump up a lot. I got back, hoping for a shower but the water was off and I looked a state – I didn’t even have any wet wipes. I used the filter water to clean my teeth and wash my face but that would have to do. The rain was torrential just at the time that I needed to leave, and the water came back on as I was going.

Video of Teddy being a bit friendly with his toy

Lukka bar had reopened this weekend and was doing Sunday lunch today. I’d already asked some friends if they fancied it and I’d remembered that Vanessa’s son, Brad, loved a Sunday dinner as she had mentioned they often go out together for one in the UK. We had all pre ordered our meals and agreed to meet at 2pm at Lukka bar. The Beef Sunday dinner was 255 lira (£11.10), the chicken dinner is only 185 lira (£8.05). The portion size is massive so I took Tupperware for any leftovers (I hate wasting food and money). On arrival, Linda and I decided to splash out on a bottle of red wine between us, Nanny Kay was driving so had a soft drink. Brad arrived extremely apologetic having not been able to find where Vanessa had hidden the house keys, making him a tad late. He ordered a beer and I introduced him to Linda and Nanny Kay. Linda and I had lots of cat talk as she was looking after Kate’s 6 cats for the first time in ages and had taken over from Vinnie. When the food came it looked fantastic, there was no cheese sauce on the cauliflower, as advertised, and I had my gravy on the side so I could do damage limitations on my Slimming World diet. Nanny Kay was short on carrots and the Brussel sprouts could do with a few minutes more cooking as they were too hard, so I let the waiter know for future diners. The Yorkshire puddings are phenomenal and the biggest I’ve ever had, this is a good recommendation to a Turkish chef from a Yorkshire lass, who hasn’t been to England for 13 months. I thoroughly enjoyed the dinner and the company, we had a break before dessert where I filled my Tupperware with half of my dinner, plus the others’ spare sprouts and Nanny Kay’s left over Yorkshire pud. I had a smaller Tupperware which I intended the apple crumble to go in, however, when it came I couldn’t resist it. We’d all had a jolly good time but the rain was threatening again so we said our farewells. Nanny Kay drove home, Linda cycled to Mark and Kate’s and, as you may have guessed, Brad and I decided we could probably have another drink!

Brad kindly agreed to a dog walk, to walk off a bit of our Sunday dinner and get some exercise for his recovering knee. I had to call in to Captain Caveman’s apartment briefly on the way. As I pointed out to duck under the rose thorns, Brad snapped the stems with his bare hands and tucked them in to the plant – that was that problem solved!
We went to Jamie’s and collected all 3 dogs who were obviously pleased to be getting out after being left for 3 hours, Little Ted in his crate. When I told them we would have a walk to the Waterfall, Edna was beside herself with excitement at the chance to see Skippy. Little Ted didn’t remember what Waterfall meant but was enthusiastic regardless. After a walk around the block and round by Poo corner we arrived at the Waterfall. All the dogs were made welcome and a fuss made of them but Skippy wasn’t there to see that I’d not shrunk Norman. Brad and I got chatting, the dogs were quite happy and we ended up having a couple more drinks in the Waterfall where it was toasty warm. We were reassuring ourselves that we were quite fortunate not to be on the all inclusive-big-bender weekend for Alp’s birthday. We knew that without our partners there we’d probably have had alcohol poisoning by now, as well as putting on loads of weight from the all you can eat food! We had a good laugh and when it got to the dog’s dinner time we decided to grab more drinks and go back to Jamie’s.

I never thought to offer Brad the WiFi password at Jamie’s villa and we were just so busy chatting that we didn’t check our phones. After more red wine for me and beer for Brad I decided to do us a curry for dinner. I was a bit drunk and had to do the rice in a pan for the first time in years, the curry was a vegetarian Dahl type so I chucked in some leftover cooked chicken from Jamie’s fridge. It was pretty good and we ate it all, as if we’d not already had a big lunch! We didn’t realise the time until Vanessa messaged to check Brad was ok! As no one had heard from him, and he’d only gone out for Sunday lunch with the ‘oldies’ at 2pm, there were concerns from his girlfriend and parents. It was after midnight when Brad left and I told him to message me once he got home. I got in bed and fell asleep before seeing that message.

Dalyan – 19th January

I got up early on Thursday 19th January intending to go back to bed but Charlie had cheekily taken my spot in the bed. I let all 3 dogs know that we had to get up anyway as Jamie was on his way home from Mauritius and would be arriving in to Dalaman airport at 9.30am. Norman and Edna were excited but Charlie not so much as I started packing and stripping the bed. By 9.30am Norman was pacing about the lounge and kitchen wondering where Daddy was but Edna was waiting on the sofa knowing there would be luggage to collect. By 10am Norman had drafted Charlie in to keep a look out for Jamie and they were on high alert for the sound of the taxi and gate.

Jamie arrived at 10.30am and after a doggy reunion we decided to go to Ela’s Kitchen for a breakfast. We both had the big one, me without tomatoes and eggs, Jamie without mushrooms, and it was delightful. Jamie surprised me by buying my breakfast as a belated birthday treat which was very good of him. Our next mission was for me to move back to Helen and Abi’s as I had quite a lot of stuff, including all the freezer stuff, to shift. Jamie drove me round and helped me carry everything too – it would have took me about 10 journeys on foot, easily.

As Charlie and I moved back in to the top floor apartment, Helen messaged me with sad news and I decided to give her home a bit of a spruce up. I took the Christmas tree and decorations down, hoovered up and checked with Katrina if it was ok to use the shower, now that the plumber had fixed everything. Jamie had already said I could use his shower if I needed to, which was very kind, but I could go to Captain Caveman’s place quite easily. Katrina confirmed it was ok to use as the leak had been fixed and she wanted me to try it to check all was well anyway. After putting all my stuff away I went to see what Charlie was up to and I found him on Abi’s bed. We went out on to the front roof terrace and I noticed that the hot water tank was spewing out boiling hot water so I let Katrina and Mehmet know. Charlie seemed to be pleased to be home but was a bit out of sync. I think he was either expecting Helen and Abi to be back or for me to be leaving him, because of all the bags. He even laid on what was Captain Caveman’s pillows as if he was hoping to find him back in the apartment. We had quite a long dog walk around the area that Charlie knows well and then went back ‘home’ for a quiet night in.

As we were almost out of dog food I went back to the pet shop and bought just 2kg of dog food for 50 lira (£2.21). Jamie had said if it was different to what Charlie was having, to mix it in with the old so that it didn’t upset his stomach, so I would do that. I went to Migros Supermarket too and bought skimmed milk and 2 lots of quark which came to 47.50 lira (£2.10). As I was coming out of the shop deciding what I would make for dinner, I got called over to Jiks!

Armed with the dog food and Migros shopping at 5pm, I went over to Jiks where Matt, Vanessa, Janet, Kev, Mark and Kate were having a beverage and they invited me to join them. I had a couple of white wine & sodas and, for some reason, all the ladies were trying on each others hats. We had a good laugh with Vanessa who had told us that Madge had been accusing her of talking too much. Nanny Kay and Becky arrived just as everyone was getting ready to leave and we briefly discussed my belated birthday get together next week. Matt & Vanessa had booked a table at Balıkçım for Thursday night fish and chips. I wasn’t going to go on account of me (supposedly) being back on my diet! I was (so easily) persuaded and, while Matt, Vanessa, Janet & Kev set off across town to the restaurant, Mark and Kate waited to give me a lift on their mobility scooter. This was handy as I could put my shopping on the back and we were there in just a couple of minutes.

At Balıkçım I ordered a glass of white wine to go with my fish and chips and it’s definitely the nicest white wine I’ve drank while out in town. Kate was very good and ordered meze dishes as a main meal while the rest of us ordered the infamous fish and chips. When it came I was very impressed as it was huge, the batter was crispy, the chips were excellent and the fish tasted amazing. Everyone else had either mushy peas or curry sauce (or both) on their’s but I just had the Turkish vinegar. A few splashes of non-brewed condiment would have made it perfect but we were in Dalyan so I couldn’t expect them to have that.
Unsurprisingly, I ate every bit of mine and I even ate the generous serving of fresh rocket on the side. I was glad I’d gone along and was very pleased to have had such a big meal for less than an English £10. While we were there Matt and Vanessa spoke to Alp, the owner, about his forthcoming birthday weekend. He was going to be celebrating his 50th birthday at a 5 star all inclusive hotel in Antalya and Matt was organising a bus for anyone in Dalyan who wanted to go.
After our fish supper someone, I’m not sure who, had an idea to go for one more drink! Janet and Kev headed off home, Matt and Vanessa said we’d meet at Bistro Blue, Kate and I walked there while Mark followed on the mobility scooter, with the shopping.

Inside Bistro Blue was nice and cosy at the bar area and it was only 8pm as we ordered drinks. I switched to red wine as I do like a red in Bistro Blue, Mark went from beer to red, Kate opted for vodka and diet coke while Matt had beer and Vanessa had a white wine and soda. The service was good but the music wasn’t as good without Selahı doing his DJing. We had a good laugh and when Matt and Vanessa paid their bill and left, I thought we would also be leaving. Mark and Kate had already said they would give me a lift back to Helen & Abi’s on the Puff Truck, it was on their way home almost and I was conscious that Charlie was on his own for the first time in just over 2 weeks. By 8.45pm Kate was doing some sort of drunken gymnastics on the stairs with the bannister and I was concerned an accident was waiting to happen. By 10pm Mark was also doing banister balancing which in turn lead to Kate having another go. Fortuitously no injuries were sustained and by 10.30pm I’d ordered the bill. I’d had 3 wines, Mark had 5 (we should have bought a bottle) but Kate had excelled herself with 6 vodka and diet cokes plus an extra diet coke. When the bill came it was a reasonable 80 lira (£3.54) per wine and 100 lira (£4.43) for a generous vodka and small bottle of diet coke. Mark and Kate saw that there was an extra 25 lira (£1.11) on the bill under ‘soda’ and argued they had not had a soda. This was actually for the extra bottle of diet coke Kate had asked for when she thought the vodka was a bit strong. I think Omer, the bar man, was happy to take it off the bill just to get rid of us, as Kate tried to pay on card. I paid mine in cash but Kate was too tipsy to be able to get the card and machine to do it’s thing. Luckily, I had cash on me so I paid the bill and took a photo to remind Kate in the morning.
I got a lift home, almost forgot the shopping on the back, and said goodnight – it had been a really good impromptu night! When I got in, Charlie wanted to know what time I called this, getting in at 10.45pm on a school night smelling of booze!?

Dalyan – 11th January

I had reached the ripe old age of 50 and was no longer in my 40s on Wednesday 11th January. When I was younger I always assumed that I’d be doing something wild and exciting on my birthday to celebrate my 50th, or at least with family or my partner, however, that wasn’t quite to be. I’d been awake with all 3 scared dogs until almost 4am as it was blowing a hooley outside Jamie’s villa and the rain was relentless. Even before I’d got up, I knew my birthday night out at Bistro Blue would be cancelled. Captain Caveman called me but forgot to wish me a happy birthday until I mentioned it and we chatted while I was still in bed. Annie from Bistro Blue messaged to say the venue was flooded and could not open today but she would see how things were tomorrow. I agreed to postpone my birthday until then and messaged everyone to let them know. Quite a few people replied to say that even if my birthday went ahead tomorrow they already had other plans, so it looked like a much smaller do, if at all. It was disappointing but these are the issues that happen with a winter birthday so I wasn’t too upset by it. I opened a card from my parents which had some money in, I still had their Christmas money too and thought I’d probably buy something to wear when I got the chance. In 2022 I’d not bought one item of clothing and it showed as I didn’t have many clothes these days. I went downstairs, had a cup of tea and laughed that I’d put Louisa’s leftover vodka and coke from last night in the fridge. I’d got so used to having minimal waste these days that I may have taken it a bit far by saving Louisa’s drink for her to have the next day. I took the dogs out in the heavy rain for a very short walk and dried each one on a towel when we got back in. I’d managed to get the toaster down off the high shelf ready for Louisa coming and I had some sliced bread in ready for toast. When Louisa got up she also forgot to say Happy Birthday at first which was funny. I mentioned Vanessa would be over around lunch time for some birthday action and that we needed a Plan B with my birthday party tonight being cancelled. I think the weather made it feel less like a birthday and I wondered what we were going to do today apart from stay at home.

Video taken by Louisa of me giving treats to Edna, Norman and Charlie in exchange for them sitting and giving a paw

Fat Club was also cancelled so I wasn’t even going to that but Kate and Irena had still managed to go to Art class, and Vanessa went to Line Dancing. Vanessa arrived at Jamie’s around 12.30pm with a card and a present for me which was so kind. The silver bracelet was really lovely and she popped it me on to my wrist between my bracelets from Captain Caveman and Ingrid. I reheated yesterday’s curry and I opened a bottle of fizz (the one I bought for New Year but didn’t drink) for the 3 of us. We did a birthday cheers and Louisa gave me her glass of prosecco as she’s not a fan of it – a decent one is hard to get here so I wasn’t wasting any! Vanessa and I both had second helpings of the chicken and pumpkin curry and Vanessa got quite tiddly. I took the dogs out for a walk in the rain while Vanessa and Louisa carried on chatting and drinking, there was no point all 3 of us going out in the rain getting soaked on my birthday, after all! When I got back Louisa was having a vodka and coke, Vanessa a gin and Sprite while I just had a glass of water and a towel for mine and the dogs’ feet.

Kate messaged to say she was still rained in at Kordon with Irena and that we should get a taxi down there. At the same time, Matt was on the phone to Vanessa arranging to go to Tez bar with Mark. We decided to get the taxi to Kordon just after 3pm and when we got there, a rather drunk Vanessa took Louisa off in the rain. I said hello to Kate, Wolfie and Irena who all wished me happy birthday and had perhaps been on the beers a while. I ordered a beer and joined them next to the indoor fire which was nice and warm. When Vanessa and Louisa came back, wet from the rain, Vanessa announced that they had been to Tez bar to serve Matt and Mark with orders to come to join us immediately. Of course that fell on deaf ears and they remained there until it got too cold for them. In the meantime, Vanessa had also surprised me with a lovely chocolate cake which we all had a piece of, then the waiter gave the rest to a friendly bunch of English people on the next table.

When Mark and Matt arrived they were also quite merry and had forgotten it was my birthday too, so they never did wish me a happy birthday between them. I didn’t feel like getting on it really because I hoped we’d all celebrate my birthday together tomorrow but, as Louisa was ordering her second Malibu and coke, I thought I may as well have another beer. Kate decided we should eat at Kordon, so we looked at the menu, Wolfie and Irena went home in the rain. Kate ordered the orange chicken, Mark chose the lamb, Louisa went for Adana kebab, Vanessa ordered liver, Matt the chicken schnitzel and I a chicken shish. During the dining experience, I got calls and texts because the leak at Charlie’s had become worse due to the heavy rain. The rooftop balcony was flooding and I was asked if I could go over there. I explained I was trying to make the most of a cancelled birthday and was in the middle of eating so I said to phone the landlord – there was nothing I could really do and luckily Charlie was at Jamie’s villa and safe.
The food at Kordon was really nice but I couldn’t eat it all on account of the 2 lunchtime curry portions so I took half of it home. The rain never eased off, rain water was starting to come in above our table and we were encouraged to go to Waterfall bar on our way home. Matt was making sure a very merry Vanessa got home but Mark and Kate were up for more drinks so Louisa and I shared a taxi with them.

Unfortunately, it was past 9pm and Waterfall had already closed so Mark and Kate dropped us off at Jamie’s. When we got out of the taxi the water was ankle deep on the road and the pool had overflowed. Once inside the villa I tried to let the dogs out on the back garden but they took one look at the weather and decided they weren’t going out there. Meanwhile, some friends were on their way from Fethiye in torrential ‘stay at home’ weather as they wanted to see me on my birthday. They arrived at Mark and Kate’s 2 hours late at 10.30pm by which time everyone was ready for bed. They ended up staying at Mark and Kate’s and I declined to venture over there because it was so late and awful weather. Louisa and I had more drinks as we’d only had 2 in the 6 hours at Kordon and stayed up chatting for ages. By the time I got in to bed that night I was begging for mercy as I set my alarm for 8am. It wasn’t the birthday I’d planned but it was still one I’d remember.

Dalyan – 10th January

I was up and about early on Tuesday 10th January as Louisa was on her way from Manchester to Dalaman airport. I was really pleased that she was coming out to help me celebrate my 50th birthday. The dogs weren’t happy that I wasn’t back in bed with a cuppa so they had to do their snoozing on the sofa. I popped all the ingredients for a chicken and pumpkin curry in to the slow cooker and let Louisa know that’s what we were eating later. I crammed in as much editing as I could before lunch as I would be taking the next couple of days off for my birthday. Jamie had been gone a week now and he and his partner were enjoying Mauritius. Everyday they showed off their hotel towel art but it wasn’t that good, I decided to make some out of their tea towel and sent them photos of it.
I spent my lunch break walking Charlie, Norman and Edna and even got a photo of them walking together. Back home, I cleaned and tidied in readiness for Louisa arriving. The sky was growing dark and storms were predicted, my birthday tomorrow was booked for quite a lot of us so I hoped it wouldn’t get cancelled.

Louisa arrived and she had brought me a block of Red Leicester cheese, which I’d asked her to and I was so happy. She’d been a bit worried about being able to get dairy through as it’s on the list of produce not to be able to bring in, even though everyone does. It’s my favourite cheese and you can’t get it often here, what they do have is super expensive too.
I’d not seen Louisa for 9 months, the last time was when she’d been over with her nephew and mom in April last year. It was great to see her and she had a funky new haircut which looked great. Louisa didn’t fancy the curry I’d made for dinner so I turned it off and we could perhaps have it tomorrow for lunch. The rain was still holding off so we decided to go out to the bank. As we were walking it was obvious that it was definitely going to rain tonight and the forecast said it would be heavy for a few days. We ended up in Jiks where a glass of red wine was now only 60 lira (£2.64) but a shandy was 80 lira (£3.51). Of course we had to bump in to Madge, who came over to ask about my ‘pregnancy’ again. I really should have been eating that Slimming World friendly curry at home instead of joining Louisa for a pizza. I ordered the Slim pizza (which was incorrectly named but I took off ham and added mushrooms) while Louisa ordered the Happy pizza. They were only 90 lira (£3.95) each and it tasted so good that I ate the whole thing. My diet was, once again, postponed – until after my birthday. The rain started and we walked back to Jamie’s where I opened a bottle of red wine and Louisa had a vodka and coke. She’d not even managed to drink much of it before falling asleep on the sofa around 9.30pm – it had been a long day of travelling for her. As the rain got heavier and heavier I had a feeling my birthday tomorrow would not go as planned.

Dalyan – 3rd & 4th January

Before I’d walked Charlie on Tuesday 3rd January, I’d already had some photos from Captain Caveman in Phong Nha. He had been out and about meeting friends at familiar haunts and because of the 4 hour time difference had already had lunch. Ganesh, the Indian restaurant, was now open and he was looking forward to trying it in the next few days. I walked Charlie and completed some editing, which Charlie wasn’t impressed about. For lunch I tried to salvage the ruined mushroom risotto by making risotto balls and they weren’t too bad. I also started looking at flights to the UK, hoping to pop back for a week or so. The prices to get to the UK were very cheap but to return to Turkey were not. The temperature felt cold here at 19°C at 5.30pm so I knew I’d struggle with the cold weather in England. My parents and Captain Caveman had left Dalyan a week ago now but it did seem like a lot longer.
While Captain Caveman had been to Bamboo cafe and then was out with Tatas, I moved in to Jamie’s for another pet sitting stint. At 6.30pm I arrived, with Charlie, at Jamie’s villa and we had a glass of wine before he jetted off on his holidays. Dale, who handles residency applications, amongst other things, popped round and he joined us with a tonic water. I would be staying for 16 days to look after Jamie’s dogs, Norman and Edna, but Charlie seemed a little apprehensive of his new sofa buddies. When it came to bedtime he came with me, Norman and Edna slept on the sofa downstairs.

I couldn’t reach the toaster at Jamie’s and I was struggling to open some of the new handle-less kitchen cupboards. On Wednesday 4th January I had to have cereals for breakfast because of this and they’d gone a bit soggy by the time I’d found and got in to the cutlery drawer for a spoon. It was sunny out, although I noticed Jamie had not expected nice weather in Dalyan as all the garden furniture had now been put away. There was washing hung out next door so I wondered if we were expecting neighbours but I think it was just the cleaner popping round to do a spruce up. Charlie was still unsure why he was staying at Jamie’s with Norman and Edna, so he had assumed the guard dog position. He barked at the Cleaner as we had a chat and she said she knew me from Facebook. I managed to get some editing completed on my laptop but working at the breakfast bar on a high stool made my legs a bit numb.
At lunch time I popped back to Charlie’s home to pick up more of his stuff, including his blanket, and he snuck in a cheeky sunbathe on the roof terrace. While I was there, I saw Jamie’s plumber who was on the roof, and it confused both of us at the same time. I was still walking the 3 dogs in 2 separate walks as I couldn’t manage all of them at once, yet.
Fat Club was exciting as Ghislaine had gifts from Atyom, the Russian, for the 5 of us from her birthday bash. We each had a lovely bracelet in a box and gift bag to say thanks – how nice was that!?
It was no surprise that the results of my weigh-in weren’t good and I had put on 0.8kg this week. I’d only left the dogs for 1 hour to pop to Fat Club, when I got back they had all been well behaved but acted like I’d been gone for a week.
I didn’t eat lunch until 5pm but I had a jacket potato with cheese (no butter) then I fed the dogs. I made sure to feed them in separate sections of the kitchen as Charlie was used to having his food bowl full at all times so he could eat when he wanted. The King Charles Cavaliers will snaffle anything so I couldn’t leave Charlie’s food out and he took his time eating while the other 2 waited for any spare, which never happened.
I spoke to my parents on video call and they were doing well, getting used to the cold back home in Sheffield.
Later in the evening I had some pasta then settled down for dog snuggles. Captain Caveman was settling in to Phong Nha well, he’d been to meet friends in Dong Hoi, had drank wine with Tatas and finished his evening with a Porter party, where all his work friends and colleagues were.

Photos from Captain Caveman in Vietnam

Photo credit – Captain Caveman and Tatas

Dalyan – 26th December

As it was my parents’ and Captain Caveman’s last full day in Dalyan on Monday 26th December, I had organised a last outing. After the copious amount of booze yesterday I was somewhat woolly headed as we walked Charlie and told him he would get to have a day at home. We were off on a boat trip to Köyceğiz and there was 28 of us on Ali Özalp’s boat. To make it simple we had organised it via Kaan, who’s boat was out of the water, to leave from near Kaunos Tea Gardens at 10.30am. We would take our own drinks, have a mooch round Köyceğiz market, have a bite to eat and then return before it got too cold. Josh had agreed last night that he would bring a rucksack full of Efes and we would meet him at the tea gardens. We called for croissants and Sprite at Migros then when we met Josh, he had also bought Sprite and we were all begging for mercy, after last night’s boozy shenanigans.
On board the boat were some of the usual reprobates as well as a few new people; my parents, Captain Caveman & me, Josh, Kaan, Tayfur, Vanessa & Matt, Janet & Kev, Adam & Kath, Mark & Kate, Linda, Julio, Julius & Toni, Peter, Bianca, Sue, Ron & Sarah, Cath & Keith, 007 and Gay Gaz. Of course Gay Gaz had turned up already tiddly and hadn’t got the memo that it was bring your own booze, as he stepped on the boat and asked for a vodka and coke. Kaan and Tay sorted out a quick trip to the shops to get Gaz his required fix and then we were off on the pleasant journey to Köyceğiz. I did my best to be sociable with everyone but I was feeling quite tired and delicate, and it wasn’t my last day in Dalyan, afterall. When we got to Köyceğiz I was keen to go to the fruit and veg market on account of not going on Saturday in Dalyan. There had been some talk of us all meeting up in Tuana restaurant and, if not, back on the boat at 3pm. My parents, Josh, Captain Caveman and I went off in search of fresh produce and left the others to decide what they were doing. After purchasing a rather heavy bag load of groceries I was looking forward to having a sit down and a cold drink. We didn’t get as far as Tuana before I needed to put the bag down and nip to the loo at Avant Garde restaurant. A lovely little place on the waterfront which also had good veggie options on the menu. I got a bit over ambitious and ordered a chicken burger, mom had a seafood pasta dish and the men had various quesadillas/wraps. Only Dad and Captain Caveman could manage a beer, while I hoped I’d make it home in tact.

By 3pm we were all mostly back on the boat but just waiting for a stray or two. It would be have been easy for any onlooker to think we were in the throws of a murder mystery afternoon but it turned out Kev was feeling rather more delicate than I was and had gone for a lay down on the front of the boat. Sailing back was pleasant and sunny but it was rather fresh as the sun dipped. Gay Gaz was on one of his ‘drunken and don’t care’ missions by leaning on the anchor chain while being precariously close to the switch. A few of us tried to talk him in to moving due to it not being safe and that he could end up decapitated, but it fell on deaf ears. What made him move in the end was that he might get his bright yellow coat dirty.

When we got off the boat most people went home for a good rest while only the foolhardy and inebriated soldiered on for a last drink at Rehab bar. Captain Caveman and I decided we would go get Charlie and walk him back to Rehab. By the time we got there, Kate was doing a superb job of trying to get Gay Gaz in to a taxi where neither them nor the driver knew Gaz’s address. Luckily, I had it marked on my phone and could tell the driver as Kate shouted ‘Get in to the choppa, Gary!’
In Rehab bar, Julius and Peter got their decks out and gave us a few tunes while they waited for their taxi back to Fethiye. Charlie didn’t really care for the music but he certainly was up for meeting more people and chasing a stray dog if he got the chance.
That night we didn’t even all go out as I think we had overdone it. Captain Caveman and I stayed in and he insisted on having some quiet time with Charlie to say goodbye – I think they would miss each other. My parents still went out as they had nothing in for dinner and Josh went out, but separately. Tomorrow we would all meet for breakfast and to say farewell.

joloyolo

The ramblings and observations of a fortysomething lady of leisure

Tag: Sheffield