Dalyan, Rhodes Town & Ialyssos – 15th September

Sunday 15th September was a long but eventful day, where I very nearly didn’t get to Rhodes for my holiday with the girls. My friend and I were up before the agreed 4.30am and were ready to leave before 5am for our drive to Marmaris. By 5.40am we had a blow out on the main motorway and we didn’t really know what to do. Luckily, we both had a working phone and our torches were able to flag 2 men down, despite the dark. They stopped, but spoke no English and were panicking that we had not managed to get the vehicle off the side of the road. We told them we had a jack and some tools but the bolts were too stiff for us and they didn’t know how to change the tyre for the spare. We managed to get in touch with a Turkish friend and he was on his way but would be about 40 minutes, we put the 2 men on the phone so that they could speak in Turkish to try to help further. We established they were Kurdish and that they were insisting on us moving the car off the road, which they helped us with and we had to push. By 6.45am we were in danger of missing the 8.45am ferry from Marmaris to Rhodes. As I was booked on the 11am we would have to ask if my friend could get on the later one with me. I took photos of the car’s predicament in case we had to prove our excuse for being late. Our Turkish friend arrived in a yellow taxi with a mechanic and they fixed the car. We gave them simits in case they were hungry and they followed us to the next junction to check all was fine with the car – it was. Ferry check-in was at 7.45am but we arrived at 7.46am and the staff member was great. She let me switch on to the earlier ferry at no cost and all was fine. I’d already taken a sea sickness pill as I anticipated a rough crossing but I was thinking I might take another. We were a little in shock that we had made it to the ferry in good time and there were even little bunnies just freely hopping about. The Yeşil Marmaris Lines ferry, left Marmaris at 8.45am, we got sandwiches and tea for a total of 400 lira (£9), and they were fresh and filling. We both decided to take a sea sickness tablet and we were asleep before we had even got out of the dock. When I did wake up an hour later, all I could hear and see were far too many people being sick – not all of them in to the bags that the staff were desperately trying to hand out. It smelled and sounded horrendous, I could see land in the distance through the very choppy sea but I closed my eyes and went back to sleep!
By 10am we were getting off the ferry, through immigration and I headed for the souvenir shop to ask if they did left luggage. The very nice lady there told me to follow her to a shelf at the back of the shop and we popped my rucksack in a hidden room for the day at a cost of just €3 (£2.51). I was glad that I didn’t have to carry it as it was jammed full but it did mean that I could probably have added in some duty free gin if I’d not been so concerned about avoiding vomiting passengers. I still had to pick it back up when we came back at 4.30pm to check in for my friend’s return ferry.

My travel buddy for the day already had a list of things she wanted to see while on the island of Rhodes, and was very keen for us to take the bus to Tsambika Monastery. We walked from the port, along the harbour and via the boats filled with stuff made from shells. The bus ticket from Rhodes Town to Tsambika Monastary on the 11am no.23 bus cost €3.30 (£2.76) each. The bus was in, we only just made it and I think I remembered where we should get off to head for the monastery. On a few of my visits to Rhodes, I had gone past it on the bus on my way to Lindos or Lardos.

It took us 50 minutes to get there and the sun was already pretty warm so I wasn’t relishing the thought of walking to the top but my friend was so keen to see this place and I’d never been. A Greek lady who also got off the bus and was wanting to visit the Tsambika Monastery was chatting to us, in Greek, as a car came past and we flagged them down. The 3 of us managed to cram in the back and got a lift to the first main car park, then set off walking. My friend reminded me a little of Captain Caveman as she forged on ahead, stopping to briefly check I was still following. I finally reached the top at 12.30pm and took a selfie at the Greek flag.

The old monastery is built on top of a big hill with gorgeous views to the sea and the surrounding area, the views over the beaches of Tsambika and Kolymbia are pretty amazing too. Like a lot of tourist attractions, the monastery itself was underwhelming, small and full of vendors selling religious tat. My friend loved it and had already taken photos while I had a puff of my inhaler. The 300 steps with just a small bottle of water and some polo mints had been hard work and there was no time to rest at the top. We had to descend the 300 steps, buy some more water and get back to the bus stop on the main road by 1pm. I’d asked when we had bought the bus tickets what time the return bus was and got told 1pm, the driver had told us 1pm from Lindos so we weren’t sure as we flagged a fancy car down and we got a lift to the bottom with some kind locals. We both needed a wee as there were no toilets at this tourist attraction. We waited ages for the bus, other potential passengers came and went, we drank all our water, ate our emergency apples and generally moaned about the sun and lack of any shade – we could see how Michael Moseley could have got in to difficulty in this type of terrain and temperature.

I was just about to go in to the bushes for a pee around 1.50pm, when the bus came and we were very glad to get on it. By 2.30pm we were safely back in the old town and ready to tick off another few ‘must sees’. My friend was quite a lot more taken with the Temple of Aphrodite than I’ve seen any other person be, as we simply walked past it in the ruins and walls.

By 3pm I was ready for food and a drink. We sat upstairs at Archipelagos and ordered a glass of rosé wine for €7 (£5.85) each and a main meal each. I chose the pork skewer for €16.50 (£13.80) and my friend went for the beef stifado at €17.50 (£14.63). The food was lovely but we were only just going to make it to the ferry port in time to check in.
I retrieved my left luggage and bought another bottle of water for 1 Euro then it was time to say farewell to my travel buddy. We had enjoyed a great day out in Rhodes and I was glad she had finally had someone to suffer the monastery with her.

At 4.45pm I was on my way out of the port and off to the bus station, once more. There was a bus which would leave at 5.25pm and take 38 minutes to get to a hotel near to where the girls were staying in Ialyssos, on the North West of the island. My bag was heavy, the sun was strong and I was tempted to get a taxi but there were none about. The bus stop was crowded and there was only one bus coming so I decided to walk back to the taxi rank and pay the €15 (£12.50) for the 10 minute ride. Unfortunately, without a working phone, I couldn’t find the location and the taxi driver only new the approximate place. I asked a waiter at a nearby restaurant but he was too busy and unhelpful. I finally found the villa, which was about 10 metres away from where the taxi driver dropped me in the first place!
Finally, after a very long and eventful day, I was reunited with Clare, Kelly & Louisa at the extremely lovely villa. I was welcomed with hugs and rum which was nice and then given a little tour of the premises, logged on to the internet and I shoved my bag in the twin room. Even though I still had to work while I was there, I was sure I would get lots of time to enjoy being with my friends again. Dinner was a fantastic buffet of meats, feta cheese, salad and bread which went down very well. I hardly took any photos as my phone was on charge after today’s jaunts. We stayed up chatting and catching up on who was doing what, while drinking. I stuck to just rum with ice as I had got so used to not drinking any fizzy drinks or juice most of the time and didn’t want to dilute it. That night, I was so tired I could’ve slept on a washing line and I did not need any help nodding off.

Photo credit – some photos taken by my travel buddy

Dalyan – 14th September

Saturday 14th September was full on for me. I worked for a couple of hours in the morning before popping to the shop to get some breakfast, as I had emptied the fridge & cupboards already. Here’s what I bought, prices in lira;

Migros Supermarket
Peanut bar 9.95
1 Simit 12.50
Granola bar 15.36
Polo mints 18.95
Total spent 56.46 lira (£1.27)

Meanwhile, Gayle & Neil were off on a weekend trip with Murat to Datça early this morning. My friends Kelly, Clare & Louisa were on their way to their respective airports and then to Rhodes.
I finished work and then went to the bank so that I could put a load of cash in to the bank to pay on to my credit card. Captain Caveman had decided that it would be best for him not to use his Vietnamese card to pay the money for my hotel stay and that he would transfer it to my Wise account instead. I had transferred it and paid extra on to my credit card so that it was in credit, ready to pay the hotel. When I went back to check out, the receptionist said she could only accept cash, even though I had specifically booked this hotel to be able to pay on card. It was now a bit of an inconvenience as I had no cash and there was over 14,000 lira on my credit card which I had no intentions of spending on anything else! I had to ask a friend if I could transfer some money to her and her pay the hotel when she arrived tomorrow. After sorting out the payment and transferring money to my friend in the UK, the owner turned up and said it was ok to pay with my credit card, but it was too late.
I got picked up by a friend, with my big rucksack and all my luggage/laptop for Rhodes and we drove to the beach. I was reluctant to leave all my stuff in the car but I also really wanted to get in the sea after a stressful morning. I paid the 100 lira (£2.24) parking fee on my card and then we went to the beach café for a late lunch. My friend ordered a tuna sandwich and a diet coke, while I had a chicken sandwich, a bottle of water and a Turkish tea for 375.00 lira (£8.41). The food was hot and tasty and not a bad price for what we had – I noticed a sign which said the café closed at 6.30pm.
The sea was super choppy but the sun red hot as we got in for our swim and stayed in there for ages, mainly jumping the waves. I thoroughly enjoyed splashing about and trying not to lose any of my bathers as it was a top and bottoms combo. It was gone 7pm by the time we had got back to my friend’s place, cracked open the wine and got a bit of a picnic out on the balcony, in time to watch the sunset.
It was an early night, the alarm was set for 4.30am the next day, as we were off to Rhodes, via Marmaris.

Dalyan – 12th September

The first thing I heard from Gayle on Thursday 12th September was that she was still harping on about not having any marshmallows in her marshmallow martini at Tapa yesterday. She knew from last year that she had definitely had a proper marshmallow martini (or 2) with marshmallows on the top.
I had bread with butter, a cup of tea and some plums for breakfast and then got on with work as I was off gallivanting later. I also saw an alert on Facebook that Rhodes Town was flooded, due to stormy weather and I hoped it would be ok for the weekend for my friends’ arrival. I still didn’t know if I was joining them there, either.
I had a quick cheese sandwich for lunch and then finished work around 2pm so that I could speak to Captain Caveman before another one of the Ladies only moonlight boat trips. Captain Caveman was safely back in Phong Nha and visiting Greenfield Ecostay, he seemed ok but we still didn’t have any firm plans for his return date.

Our ladies moonlight boat trip started at 4pm and we met in the tea gardens. We sailed across to Köyceğiz and got off for a walk, where Vanessa, one of the other ladies and I all strolled to the tea gardens at the end of the promenade, then back. As usual, we got to swim until sunset and we had a bit of a laugh swimming around the boat and chatting to everyone. There was a delicious meal and some Sultaniye wine to share, plus I had another couple of wines.
We got back just before 11pm and I’d spent a total of 1,750 lira (£39.24) for 7 hours of fun, food and drink with some lovely ladies.

Photo credit – various sources

Dalyan – 8th September

I only had a cup of tea on the morning of Sunday 8th September as I was busy checking out the updates on Typhoon Yagi and the havoc it had wreaked in Hanoi, before I headed off on a day trip. I was happy that Captain Caveman was safe in Hanoi now but still worried he would be ok on the 5th floor of a building. He assured me he was fine, despite the capital city looking like it was a scene from the film ’28 Days Later’.

I was off on a boat trip which started at 10am with Captain Fuat on Adıl boat with some friends and family. There was a quick introduction for everyone then tea/coffee and some simit to nibble on as we sailed out towards Köyceğiz and the lake. The sun was shining, the scenery was lovely and I was looking forward to a day out with Gayle & Neil. Captain Fuat put on a delicious lunch which catered for everyone’s requirements easily (and there were quite a few of us that needed different allergies taking in to consideration). I obviously was not really concerned about the amount of syns I shoved in. I ate chicken, pasta, salads, meatballs, bread, fruit and, later, cake.

We did quite a bit of swimming, where we met a friendly terrapin who we called Bob. He took a shine to Ann’s chest and kept going really close to her, even though she wasn’t keen. He even went off and brought 2 more friends over who swam amongst us and seemed to want to play with us. We called these 2 terrapins Rita & Sue and then when we thought Bob had returned, but it was actually another terrapin who was slightly more interested in the ladies and their chests, we called him Bob 2. I probably found it funnier than most other guests that we had called our new friends Bob, Rita, Sue & Bob 2 after the film.
The day was really relaxed and easy going with lots of swimming, which I loved. By the time we got off the boat I was quite merry and I’d gone way over my usual wine consumption by having 5 glasses.

We got off and said our goodbyes to everyone. Ann, Stuart, Gayle, Neil and I were walking the same way home so we ended up stopping off for a quick drink in Askın’s where I ordered a pint of draft Efes. I ended up having a gin & tonic at Neil’s insistence, back at theirs and then Jamie, Drew, Norman & Edna were passing for the dog walk so they popped in to say hello. Edna took to Neil very quickly and wanted to sit on his knee while Norman had a sniff about to check for any scraps of food. I did the dog walk with Jamie & Drew and then realised I was a bit tipsy and peckish. The night ended with me getting pizza that I didn’t recall until the next day.
My Sunday had been so good and I still managed to do it on a budget; the boat trip plus drinks on the boat 2100 lira, a beer at Askın’s 120 lira and pizza 310 lira – a bargain total of 2,530 lira (£52.81).

Photo credit – Vietnam ones taken from various news and Facebook pages. Boat trips ones shared from various attendees.

Dalyan – 23rd & 24th August

There was a bit of excitement for me on Friday 23rd August as I had agreed to an outing after work, with a friend. For breakfast I had overnight oats with berries and grapes plus the obligatory Yorkshire tea (and I still hadn’t opened the wine bucket of them yet). I worked until 1.30pm and had another chicken and veg wrap for lunch. Unfortunately, the bread in the wraps had to be counted as syns but at least it was still better for me than booze, of which I had not touched a drop of, since Sunday. I’d decided in my mission to lose weight and save money, alcohol was the obvious thing to cut out. I set myself a goal to get to the end of the month without any alcohol – it was going to be tough, but needs must!

At 2pm, I was picked up and we drove up to Radar Hill, one of the highest points around and has beautiful views. We had come prepared with water, coffee, a melon and a knife. It was like being on a trip with Crocodile Dundee as my friend whipped out the knife and asked me to slice up the melon while she tried to take photos of dragon flies. A couple nearby, having a romantic picnic, must have wondered what was going on, especially when the flies came and my companion was hitting my legs with a notebook in an attempt to stop them biting.

Next, we went to Iztuzu beach for a drink and a swim. The car park fee is 100 lira (£2.33) and all payments at the car park or café must be done by card (no cash), but the café does sell beer now. After a soft drink, and a tuna sandwich for my mate, we had a swim in the sea. I got talking to some holiday makers from Ankara; Emrah and his 3 daughters Nisa, Eylul and Ela who were all very nice and the eldest wanted to practice her English. They loved Dalyan and were staying in a villa in Dalaman, they commented on how cheap they were finding it compared to where they lived in Ankara. We stayed until sunset and then I was dropped back off at my parents’ place, where I had leftover chicken casserole for dinner.

On Saturday 24th August I had my cup of tea and toast before going to the weekly Dalyan market to get some fruit and vegetables.
Here’s what I bought, prices in lira;

Stall 1
Tomatoes 23 lira (53p)

Stall 2
Bananas, grapes and peaches
Total 120 lira (£2.79)

Stall 3
Plums and a lemon 30
Lettuce 40
Melon 100
Strawberries 120
Total 290 lira (£6.74)

I had spent a total of 433 lira (£10.07) at the market and had quite a lot of lovely produce to last me most of the week.
Once back home, I unpacked my shopping and washed all the fruit, then rolled the grapes to free them from the stalks easily, and chopped all the strawberries and stored them in glass jars. These 2 ways of prepping grapes and strawberries mean they stay fresher for longer and is a good money saving tip as well as having no waste. I got on with some work and needed to crack on as I had an important video call booked in for later on.
Feeling motivated to stay on my Slimming World plan, I ate some grapes and strawberries then made a really nice wrap for lunch. It had chicken, lettuce, cabbage, carrot, and bean sprouts in and I counted the wrap as 10 syns for the bread content.
When it got to dinner time, I wasn’t that hungry so I just had fruit salad with Quark and a tiny bit of honey – delicious!
I finished work at 7.30pm and went for a quick walk to the shop, prices as usual in lira;

Migros Supermarket
Popcorn 26.95
Milk 28.25
Jasmine rice 44.50
2 tins of tomatoes 59.90
Total spent 159.60 lira (£3.71)

I hurried back and then called my parents for our video call, it was the first one since I had arrived in Turkey, 12 days ago. Ma & Pa were having a glass of wine and it was good to talk to them, even though Dad is a man of few words and leaves us women to jabber on. They were hoping to come out to Dalyan in a month’s time and would probably arrive around the same time as Captain Caveman. In the evening, I watched a bit of Netflix on my phone, while eating some popcorn before bed. I was on 79 syns for the week so far, less than half where I was this time last week and I was determined to stick to plan this week. Tomorrow I had quite a few life admin jobs to do but I was hoping for a bit of a lay in.

Dalyan & Köyceğiz – 19th August

I scheduled myself to start work later on Monday 19th August, mainly as I thought I may have needed a lay in after the 60th birthday for Debbie (Darling), yesterday. I also was meeting a friend at 9am in Jiks to go suss out the accommodation at the aparthotel her friends run. I had a look around and was really surprised at the ground floor studio apartment that I was offered. It would be £40 per night and had 1 bedroom with AC, a bathroom, and a living room/kitchen with a decent dining table for me to work at. The plug sockets were conveniently placed (which is more difficult than you’d expect here) and there was free WiFi and access to the hotel’s pool. They even agreed that Captain Caveman would be able to pay for it with a foreign bank card. I was extremely happy I had somewhere in mind that could accommodate me if and when I needed it. Of course, friends had also offered but I needed to be prepared for all eventualities.
Back home, I ate buttered toast, a peach and some grapes for breakfast, followed by a Yorkshire tea. I worked for the rest of the morning, only stopping to shovel some mushroom pasta down me. I finished working at 2.15pm and quickly got ready. I noticed I seemed to have a load of cash in my bag so I popped over to Jamie and Drew’s to work out what had happened. We cleared up that Drew had misheard the amount for the pizza and given me more than he should’ve so I returned what was right. I apologised for drinking too much – evidently I can’t keep up with the fellas. I said farewell and rushed off for my first boat trip of August. I was going on a Moonlight Ladies Only boat trip with Captain Fuat on Adil Boat. The price of the trip was £30 or whatever the going rate is in Turkish lira (currently 43) and included dinner.

We met the boat outside Saki restaurant, ready for off at 4pm. Onboard were a great bunch of 12 ladies and we sailed over to Köyceğiz, with it being market day. I had a little walk with 2 of the ladies to the plant pot shop as they wanted to look at some tat. The off-licence where Kate and I often buy cheap fizz had now been converted in to a completely different building so we walked to Carrefour where I bought the following;

2 tins of chopped tomatoes 38.00
2 bottles of Prosecco 799.80
Total spent: 837.80 lira (£19.48)
The tomatoes were half the price of those in Dalyan too!!

The Captain fed us grapes, courgette fritters and hot chips before the evening meal. There were swim stops at sunset and stargazing after a delicious dinner. To cater for all the different dietary requirements, the Captain made a vegetable noodle soup which I really liked. For main course the Captain had cooked a selection of mainly vegetarian dishes and just one dish with chicken in for the meat eaters. There was rice and salad to accompany the gorgeous food. Even the skipper had now been promoted to chief photographer and was doing an excellent job.
I managed to polish off 3 rosé wines as well as some fizz and the whole trip cost me just 1,800 lira (£41.86) which included a tip! We were back before midnight and I had thoroughly enjoyed my evening out with lovely company.

Photo credit – various photos taken by others on the boat

Otford & Knutsford – 7th August

Claire and I had exciting plans on Wednesday 7th August as she had to be up north for work and I had agreed to keep her company. I could hardly get out of bed and my whole body ached from yesterday’s workout. I got on Claire’s scales to find I had put on 0.7kg (1.5lb) which was not bad, considering what I had consumed. My measurements were much less favourable having put 2cm on my bust, and 1cm on both waist and hips. I now needed to lose 4.7kg (10lb) to get to target and that was going to be difficult. I had my tea and toast for breakfast and decided that it would be something to worry about next week!
I had a message from our Estate Agent in Dalyan to tell me there was an incident at Captain Caveman’s apartment complex and someone had left the outside tap on. The pool had overflowed badly, the road was covered in flood water which the gardeners said wasn’t them. It turned out it was probably our pool and garden company and I, as well as our tenants, were so impressed that they had turned up and put the hose on that we were willing to overlook the tap incident, mistakes do happen. However when the agent got there to speak to the Gardening company, they said it definitely wasn’t them!! I think it was.
Claire and I worked from home in the morning and then drove from Otford to Knutsford. On the way, we stopped at services to grab some lunch. Claire had another wrap and some crisps, while I went for the New York Deli Pastrami M&S sandwich deal with a brownie. We both ignored the money saving tip for the drink and just got water – but Claire was wearing white trousers. I was having trouble with the new style plastic water bottle tops which stay attached to the bottle.
We arrived at Cottons Hotel & Spa in Knutsford quite late as it had been a long drive and I’d done my best to keep Claire entertained and fed with wine gums. We had to log on to do some work emails and then we popped on our swimmers and decided to make use of the spa facilities. We had a sauna, steam room, jacuzzi and some swimming which was so lovely before going back to the room for a nice glass of wine and some nibbles while lounging in our room.
Claire arranged for us to meet a colleague for dinner and we ordered food in the bar which was very nice. I had (yet another) steak and ale pie which would more than likely be my last one in a while. Back in the room, we finished some wine and nibbles and put some weird jelly-like patches under our eyes. I’m not quite sure what they were for, but it’s some strange beauty phenomena which had become popular in the UK since I’d been away and we didn’t have any cucumber slices. I fell asleep while watching a very peculiar dating TV programme called Naked Attraction – it involved contestants who have trouble meeting people romantically but are not shy at exposing themselves to all and sundry on national TV.

Dalyan & Köyceğiz – 4th & 5th July

By the time I woke up on Thursday 4th July, my parents had already left for the airport so I didn’t get to go and wave them off. Ordinarily, this would not have happened but given that I would see them in 13 days time none of us were upset about it. I had tea and toast for breakfast then got my stuff packed to move accommodation. I worked in the morning and then ate the rest of the blueberries for lunch, sharing them with Norman and Edna. Blueberries are meant to be good for dogs so Edna wolfed them down, Norman was yet to be convinced. I left some stuff at Jamie’s, including my laptop, as I was off on a moonlight boat trip that afternoon. It was another one of the ‘Ladies only’ ones that I had helped to organise with a friend. We boarded Captain Fuat’s Adil boat around 4pm, bound for Köyceğiz. As we were setting off, one of the ladies went to the shop with the Captain to buy a last minute purchase and then it was time to go. Captain Fuat shared some fruits from his garden, the fresh figs were amazing, as well as a delicious cake made my his daughter.
We had a mooch around Köyceğiz where I tried on a dress for a forthcoming wedding in Penrith. It was a nicely fitting, off the shoulder, green and flowery number but I noticed it was coming apart at the seams a little. It was also 1200 lira (£28.92) so I decided it was out of my budget. We all left the shop and I was the last one to go, as I was leaving the older lady of the shop started to turn angry with me and accused me of ripping the poorly sewn garment. I walked out without saying anything and decided I wouldn’t be going in that shop again.
Back on the boat, we had a very lovely evening with more excellent food including hot chips after our first swim stop, courgette fritters and chicken nuggets to nibble on before dinner. One of the ladies had sold her parents’ house and wanted to share with us her good news so she had bought a couple of bottles of fizz for us all. I had a couple of glasses of rosé wine with a couple of the other ladies but I noticed most of the women weren’t drinking much, if at all – it was very civilised.
Not everyone swam but a friend and I went a few times round the boat and the sunset was amazing. We had a delicious tomato based soup as a starter and then the main course which was a mixture of dishes to accommodate meat eaters and vegetarians. I really enjoyed it and the evening was finished off with fizz/rosé and stargazing which was very relaxing.
We didn’t get back until almost midnight after what had been an amazing moonlight boat trip. The cost was £30 (1,250 lira) and Captain Fuat always looks after us very well.

I was up very early on Friday 5th July as I needed to walk over to Jamie’s to say bye to Drew, Nick and Mark before work. They were off back to the UK after a lovely holiday/stay. I called at Migros to buy a thank you bottle of wine for Jamie and I grabbed some noodles which were on offer. I spent just 337.90 lira (£8.10) and I even got Angora wine for that. I needed to get my laptop and a few things I’d not taken on the boat with me last night. It was only 24°C at 7am but there was an excessive heat weather warning for later and I also wanted to check Captain Caveman’s apartment complex again. I had been told by the pool and maintenance bloke that they had worked there this morning so I was going to inspect. When I arrived, it was less than satisfactory and obvious that no one had been that morning, or even in the last few days. Dead plants, dried leaves and generally weeds needing sorting which were easy and obvious jobs. I wasn’t happy and I messaged the maintenance man, who once again told me that they had been this morning. He blamed it on not having a hose and that there was nothing he could do as all 10 apartments needed to give him money for a hose. I told him to go buy one and I would pay and I didn’t hear back, only to say he had ordered one. I checked on Trendyol and the most expensive one was not more than 2000 lira (£47.96) and I just wanted the place clean and tidy for our guests – it was proving far too much to ask for. I sent the pool and garden man photos as I was stood there and he said that he also had photos from his brother and that it didn’t look the same – how dare they call me a liar! I suspected his workers were either tired, lazy or lying and so he promised me he would personally check every day – he had already promised this several times so I didn’t hold my breath! I also let the rental agent know but she was on holiday and the guy left in charge wasn’t able to get through to the maintenance company either. It was a joke and I really wished we’d never agreed to rent the place out. The ironic thing is that Captain Caveman and I had never agreed to this maintenance company but we had been told we were outvoted. The Aussies downstairs had not experienced any complaints from their tenants (of which they had several different customers) so it was unfortunate that only my tenants were being affected.
Because of all the faffing about, I wasn’t back ‘in the office’ until 11am, having picked up a bottle of water and a couple of simits for a bargain total of 31 lira (74p).
I worked all day then had a video chat with Captain Caveman, he was flying from Dong Hoi to Saigon tomorrow to start his journey back to the UK for his holiday.
In the evening I headed to the tea gardens for dinner with my my new house mate. We had sandwiches and soft drinks followed by an ice-cream for a total of 400 lira (£9.64). The place was very busy but there was a lovely breeze and the staff were very efficient. We went back home and arranged to get up early to go to Ortaca before work tomorrow.

Dalyan – 3rd July

Wednesday 3rd July was a lovely day for me in Dalyan. Jamie and the boys were still celebrating Mark’s birthday so I gave the dogs their breakfast and made sure they had their wees and poos before it got too hot. I also took my measurements in readiness for weigh-in at Fat Club this afternoon. I had put 5cm on my waist and hips but there was no change to my bust. This was not good news and would definitely mean I had put weight on too. I had strawberries, olives and a simit for breakfast then cracked on with some work on the patio. Midmorning I popped to the shops for some essentials;

Migros Supermarket
Quark 29.95
Skimmed milk 37.95
Soda water 40.00
Total spent 107.90 lira (£2.60)

I called at the bank to deposit cash (English and Lira) so that my total amount was met for July in regard to the residency rules. I worked more until it was time to face Carol’s scales at Fat Club. After 17 weeks away and without my own kitchen I knew I should not expect miracles but I was certainly hoping I’d managed not to put too much weight back on.
I was pleased to see I had only put 0.1kg (0.2lb) on since last week and just a total of 1.4kg (3lb) in the time I’d been away from Dalyan. My last Dalyan Fat Club weigh-in had been at the beginning of March and now I was just 2.1kg (4.6lb) over my target. That wasn’t too bad, although I was off to the UK in 5 days time so I couldn’t see it being easy to stick to the plan there.
At Jamie’s, the guys were back and we were booked in to celebrate Mark’s birthday with a fancy meal out at Le Bohème that evening. I had to close up my outdoor office as the wine was being poured and the guys were having a dip in the pool. Nanny Kay and Hannah joined us at the villa for a cheeky pre dinner drink. When we arrived at the venue, there was a lady outside having some sort of allergic reaction which Mark and Hannah went to help with while ex nurse Nanny Kay and I swerved the situation and went on inside.

Le Bohème was very nice and we had a lovely table where Emma and Yusuf were already waiting for us. We shared the beautifully presented mixed mezes for a starter and had some white wine between a few of us. For main I chose the chicken with halloumi, spinach and potatoes and it was really tasty. I was thoroughly impressed with all the food, the service and the ambience of Le Bohème. I think my share of the meal came to about 1600 lira (£38.55), including thirds on 2 bottles of good wine. It was more expensive than where I usually eat but not extortionate for what we had and I would certainly recommend for a special occasion or treat. After the meal some of us went to Aşkın’s bar for another drink and to round off the lovely evening. A round of 3 drinks came to a reasonable 450 lira (£10.84) and is definitely one of our go-to bars.
Back ‘home’, I was meant to set my alarm for tomorrow as my parents were leaving for the airport at 7am.

Photo credit – Jamie/Nick

Dalyan – 28th June

On Friday 28th June my parents and I had quite an adventure. Ma & Pa had booked the 3 of us on a Captain Boris boat trip for the day and I was so looking forward to it. I woke up at 6am feeling happy to have the temperature cooler than I was used to in Vietnam. By 8am it was still under 30°C outside but it was definitely getting hotter as I left for our day on the boat. Captain Boris is one of the more luxurious boat trips with exceptional food, hosted by the lovely Rebecca & Basrı. The cost was £40 per person and included a massive lunch with lots of different dishes. Rebecca was a bit miffed that they had 2 lots of bookings today and she had to go on the second boat, leaving 16 of us in the safe hands of Basrı and Anıl.
We headed out to sea and, although there were parts where the sandbanks were high, we got through. The sea was very rough and I was glad I’d taken a precautionary sea sickness tablet, as did one other passenger. After we got to a nice calm bay we had a swim stop and there were crisps and dips to help ourselves to. A BBQ and full buffet (including prawns) was served for lunch just after 1pm and it was absolutely amazing. The prawns and the chicken casserole were definitely my 2 favourite dishes. Ma & Pa stuck to beers but I had rose wine and we were all having a great time with a fantastic bunch of random people.
Just before 3pm, there was a bit of a disaster when something happened to the engine and the Captain instantly called May Day on the walkie talkie. I looked over the side and there seemed to be a fire or something causing a lot of smoke – it didn’t look good and we were out at sea in very choppy waves.

The food was fantastic

Short video of the boat

Captain Boris had to arrange for us to be rescued from our boat trip after we tried to get a tow but the waves were strong and Basrı needed to get out weight off this boat. Already he had neighbouring boats helping, including Princess of Ekincik who we were on last night and a cooperative, smaller boat. It became essential that we were going to have to climb over from our boat to the rescue one while bobbing about. I started to feel a bit worried for my parents; my mom has a dodgy leg and my Dad’s eyesight isn’t great. To be honest, I wasn’t sure my balancing skills stretched to straggling 2 boats of different heights while at sea. It was a bit of a to-do but we all made it – with all our bags! Boris and Anıl kept calm and efficient during the mini crisis and they got us all on to the cooperative boat safely.
We got took off to the beach to wait for Captain Boris to get sorted out but unfortunately, we had forgotten to bring our shoes. Ma braved a walk to the toilet on the beach but the floor was red hot so I didn’t attempt it. By 5pm we had been rescued and were back on Boris’s Boat, the way we had got on but in less choppy waters. We saw yellow boat and also another Captain, Simon, who came by paddle board to say hello. We got towed to Magic Lake and Basrı insisted on a free bar to apologise and, of course, Dad and I made good use of this to help encourage other guests (a couple were first timers). We were meant to be back by 5pm but it was more like 6.45pm when we got off the boat. My Dad was on a mission to carry on the night but my Mom was insisting he’d had enough so we all went home.

Of course, Dalyan wouldn’t be Dalyan without a bit of drama and it turned out neither my parents nor I would stay in that evening. When I arrived back at Jamie’s, the 4 fellas (Jamie, Drew, Nick & Mark) were waiting for me to join them for a drink at Lukka bar. It was their Friday music bingo night and the boys were booked in for food. My parents had a shower and Dad decided they were going to meet up with other Dalyan Dwellers in Tapa and Tez bars.
After a shower and change for me, I joined the guys for Lukka music bingo and it was brilliant. I had some cheesy chips and some wine, to see me through, I had a good boogie and a sing to the first half of the bingo. At the interval, Jamie had decided we were moving on to Sofra bar to enjoy the rest of the night but Mark and I decided to stay a bit longer to hear Joseph sing Sweet Dreams and have a sing-along to the start of the second half.
At Sofra bar the rest of the gang had met up with some of the regular characters and were having a good time. I nursed a pint of beer for the rest of the evening as I’d overdone it but I managed to have a go on the karaoke and probably did a bad Adele or something. I bumped in to Jack, Stan and Nigel and I enjoyed watching Jack perform one of my old favourites, Psycho Killer. It was gone 1am when we finally went home and it was a good job I was working flexible hours for tomorrow.

I love a bit of Psycho Killer

Dalyan – 27th June

On the morning of Thursday 27th June, I didn’t get out of bed until 8am Turkish time, but that was midday in Vietnamese time. By 10am I had set myself up for a working day at Books & Cookies, not far from where Captain Caveman’s apartment is located. It had AC, was very quiet for using it as an office, and had good Turkish tea. I treated myself to a savoury pastry for breakfast and got on with my tasks. By 1pm, I was peckish so I had a linden tea with some delicious homemade cookies. The owner was really lovely and we had a little chat. My bill came to 360 lira (£8.67) which I thought was reasonable.

By 3pm it was hot outside as I ventured to the bank. I needed to ensure I was depositing at least 26,000 lira (£627 at today’s rate of 41.5 lira to the pound), in order to keep my Turkish residency. On my way back ‘home’ to Jamie’s, I called in to see my parents who were on their balcony, and we had an Efes shandy.
In the evening, I had booked the 3 of us on a moonlight boat trip with Princess of Ekincik. It was £30 each and included a BBQ dinner with a few swim stops in the lake and the sea. On our way to the boat my parents and I called in to check out the complex at Captain Caveman’s place to check the pool and grounds. The pool looked fine but there was no sign of any gardening company having removed old leaves or swept the floors in a while. The floor had not been sloshed down with water recently either so, I was disappointed with our pool and garden company.

On the boat we said hello to the other customers and got comfy as we sailed to Köyceğiz lake. A small Efes beer was 100 lira (£2.41) and a glass of wine was 150 lira (£3.61) which was more than what it was 4 months ago but prices and taxes had gone up a lot. To start, Ma & Pa had beers while I had a rosé wine to try it out and we had our first swim stop at just after 7pm. Our BBQ food was as amazing as I remember it being and Ismail cooked us a feast. A bottle of white wine was purchased to have with our dinner and, as I was a bit jetlagged, I felt quite tiddly.
The boat trip was amazing and we all really enjoyed it, it was past 11pm when we got back.

Phong Nha – 14th & 15th June

I woke up at 7am on Friday 14th June, having had a lovely sleep in the bed all to myself. I went to The Villas for 10am, where I had a pot of tea and paid just 40,000VND (£1.21) for a good brew. I then had to scurry off to the Vegan as I said I’d practice English with the staff. I had a Bun Tron (a vegan rice noodle dish) while I was there and Ha asked if she could nip home to see her Dad. I agreed to hold the fort for her while she rushed off, only for her to come back with some sweet treats for me and the other girls. She had obviously wanted to go to get them as a surprise and it was really kind of her. One was a mung bean paste sweet which was not dissimilar to eating a stock cube and I’m glad I didn’t shove it all in my mouth at once.
In the evening, I went back to Phong Nha Vegan where it was so hot that Ha, the waitress, went for a swim in the river. I had tempura Oyster mushrooms with crispy sweet potato fries. It was like a vegan fish and chips and so good! I also met a couple of Vloggers from America who were enjoying the food and were very nice people. After 3 hours at the Vegan, I cycled back to Son River House Homestay and had an early night.

Saturday 15th June was an exciting day as it was the first day of a new part time job. I was doing some sales and marketing work for a friend. I went to The Villas to have breakfast and work there for the day, I find it the best place to work due to the location and the AC. Captain Caveman was due out of the cave tomorrow and didn’t even know I’d got, or started, a new job. I had my usual Pho Ga, familiarised myself with some spreadsheets and started to look at some content. I had a new friend join me while I worked, it was a moth sat on the glass door who I affectionately named Motthew the third. For lunch I had a margarita pizza with extra mushroom and I saved some to take home.
My tab for breakfast, lunch and drinks was 556,000VND (£17) which was particularly good value and I always enjoy the pizzas there.

By 6pm I was at Phong Nha Vegan having a laugh with Ha. I was meant to be having a swim with her but I had no spare clothes and the staff were too busy with their customers. While everyone was having a bit of a rest near the cooler machine, I spotted the Banh Canh lady. She comes by on her motorbike shouting ‘Banh Canh’ and sells her wares of noodles, eggs and sometimes veggies. I shouted Hanh from the kitchen and Ha from the hammock to come to buy some things. There was quite a crowd and the lady did a roaring trade. Hanh just bought the Banh Canh noodles for 10,000VND (31p).

By 9pm I was back at the homestay where Chung and the owner, Linh Giang, were waiting for me to have a drink to celebrate my first day at work. We ate juicy fresh watermelon and drank chilled red wine. I was introduced to Kim and her daughter, who were staying at Son River House too and we all had a good night together.

Phong Nha – 27th May

Our week started on Monday 27th May with Captain Caveman suggesting a bit of a cycling mission. I (mistakenly) thought the weather was suitable to agree to take Bluey all the way over to Greenfield Ecostay to visit René and Ngan. Along the way we had to stop at Lotus restaurant for brunch where Captain Caveman surprised me with his meal choice. He ordered a jacket potato with cheese, bacon and fried egg while I had a huge portion of pancakes with mango and pineapple. The food was good and I had a pot of lotus tea to go with it, as well as some water. Here’s what our bill looked like, prices in Dong;

1 water 5,000
1 iced black coffee 25,000
1 pot lotus tea 30,000
1 coconut coffee 40,000
1 passion fruit soda 40,000
1 potato with bacon, cheese & egg 50,000
1 pancake with fruit 50,000
Total cost 240,000VND (£7.46)

It’s a great place, a little out of town but ideal for a stop along the way when out for a cycle and the prices are very reasonable.

Back on the road, I was so hot cycling to Greenfield that I had to drink a Revive when we got there. Captain Caveman was cheeky and asked for a swim, I was that sweaty that I would not have been able to change in to swimmers. We missed staying at Greenfield as it’s just so beautiful and it was very calm and quiet, until we turned up! On the way back from René’s, the sun was hot and we had to stop at Lotus again, this time we each had a cold beer but I couldn’t finish mine.

Captain Caveman was glad to be going on his next Son Doong tour with Tatas so off they went to Oxalis for the 6pm briefing. I spent 3 hours and 15 minutes at the Vegan where my Vietnamese certainly got tested that night as it was absolutely rammed full. The owner was away, Chung was at her busy homestay so I had to help Ha, the only waitress and drinks maker there. In the kitchen they were also short staffed (4 less people than usual) with only Hanh, the chef, and Yen the 16 year old helper. They managed to get through it but I was absolutely knackered by the time it reached 9pm so I can only imagine how the staff felt. I got to Tree House at 9.30pm where I had 2 slices of Captain Caveman’s Hawaiian pizza and a Strongbow, before going back home for a much needed shower.

Phong Nha – 14th May

As Captain Caveman was off back in to Son Doong on Tuesday 14th May, we were up early. Our last breakfast at Greenfield Ecostay was had together, Captain Caveman had omelette and I had pineapple pancake. Ngan also gave us mango and dragon fruit to eat and, of course, I had my last Yorkshire tea for a while. I said bye to Captain Caveman and sat by the pool catching up on some writing. On his way in to town he dropped my bag at my next accommodation and messaged to say I could check in from 11am. Around 10.30am I decided to say my farewells and thanks to René and Ngan, it had been one of the best stays we’d had. I’d already written a quick note of the things I would miss most about Greenfield Ecostay;

1. The owners, and their amazing hospitality.
2. Being in such a relaxed and tranquil place.
3. Mina, the extra shy and timid dog.
4. The delicious food that is so well prepared, varied and plentiful.
5. How clean the place is despite it’s closeness to nature.
6. The feeling of being so welcome and relaxed.
7. The swimming pool, probably the cleanest and best in Phong Nha.
8. The attention to detail that the owners and their staff make to ensure the most comfortable stay; from making sure the pool towels are ready to tidying and cleaning.
9. The wine/beers with René of an evening.
10. Being away from any stresses and feeling like we are on holiday in Captain Caveman’s home town.

I arrived in Phong Nha town just before 11am and decided to go to Tree House for an early lunch. I had a bottle of water, a fresh coconut and a cream cheese & salami sandwich for 150,000VND (£4.64). There was rather a lot of salami in the sandwich and the bread was a bit clumpy but I managed it, with the lettuce from the salad too.

At 11.50am I checked in to Phong Nha Homestay, for the second time of my trip. I was given the same room as the last time but this time there was no kettle in the room and 2 less pillows on the bed. I’d found out recently that some Vietnamese people believe that if you have a second pillow in bed you are inviting the dead ancestors to come to sleep with you!
I chilled out in the room for a bit and the weather forecast predicted rain that never came so it was hot and humid. I had fruitcake and cheese for lunch which was nice but a bit rich. More news came from Turkey which meant that if I wanted to go for long-term residency, it would be a few more years yet as I no longer qualified. The pool pump and filter had been fixed which we all had to pay our share of and would have been cheaper if we’d had it done last year.

I spent about 2 hours at Phong Nha Vegan in the evening and I had the fake pork with rice, vegetables and tempura Oyster mushrooms. It was delicious and I cycled back to the homestay for a much needed early night. Tomorrow was weigh day again and I knew it wasn’t going to be a good result, I’d had 331 syns this week, 130 of which were on alcohol. I needed to get back on plan while Captain Caveman was away and I was back to being on a strict budget.

Phong Nha – 13th May

Breakfast on Monday 13th May was quite a feast, Captain Caveman had his usual and I had Yorkshire tea, pineapple and honey pancake, a banana, dragon fruit and jack fruit. We made the most of our last full day at Greenfield Ecostay and I was sad to be leaving. We swam in the pool, watched a risky rice harvest and some cows settling a dispute.

Video of the motorbike being loaded

A push to get done before the rain started

The cows were a bit restless

Another attempt

Our last lunch, prepared by Ngan, was a squid fried rice for Captain Caveman and a prawn fried rice for me. There was more dragon fruit and jack fruit and then some stormy weather in the afternoon. Mina, the dog, was scared of the thunder and hid behind the bar. Instead of going to Phong Nha with Captain Caveman, I packed my bag for leaving tomorrow. He went to his Oxalis briefing as he would be going in to the cave tomorrow.
I had a couple of white wines but no dinner, as we hadn’t ordered it for tonight as I’d planned to go to Phong Nha Vegan. Instead, I nibbled on the Banh Hoa which Chung had given us.
Back in Dalyan, the pool was finally fixed but a little too late for our dissatisfied tenant who had flown back home to the UK, having not even been in the pool. They were returning to Dalyan soon and hoped it was sorted by then. I messaged our agent to check she had spoken to the tenant in person to straighten things out and give assurances. They had not met up at all but had corresponded via text. It was hard not having any control over what was going on there, but I would be going back to Turkey at the end of June for a quick visit.
By the time Captain Caveman arrived back from his briefing, I was already in the room ready for bed. Captain Caveman had got the cash out to pay René tomorrow and I was very pleasantly surprised to hear that our total bill for 15 nights’ accommodation, food and drink came to a grand total of 15,000,000VND (£464). We could not fault the place and I was sad that I might not get to come again – it was one of my new favourite places!