Captain Caveman was off in to the cave on Friday 16th June and he would be doing 2 tours back to back over the next 8 days. I was looking forward to some quieter, less active days. In 2 weeks time I would be arriving in Rhodes to stay at Steve and Michelle’s house in Lardos. Captain Caveman and I ate left over pizza, from The Villa’s, for breakfast and then I saw him off from Ho Khanh’s homestay. I worked 10am to 7.15pm but with a couple of gaps for breaks. I ate cheese, biscuits, fruit, yoghurt and peanuts and after work I had a cheeky can of Huda beer from the fridge then watched Netflix. It felt cooler or was it because I was acclimatising after cycling in sun the last 3 days!?
For a change of scenery on Saturday 17th June, I chose to work from Victory Road Villas. I sat in the AC room of The Villa’s restaurant at the back and decided to go off piste on my breakfast order. I thought I’d try the recommendation from Captain Caveman of Bo Ne (without eggs) which was a little on the pricier side to my usual breakfast. When it came, it was different to what I imagined it to be; instead of sausage it had pâté, which I don’t like and the dish was in lots of tomato sauce, served with cucumber, which I don’t eat either. The bread was also sweet so I didn’t eat it all but I enjoyed the little hone made cookie served with my pot of Jasmine tea. I worked from 10.15am to 1.15pm then ordered an orange juice and some fresh spring rolls with prawns in. Lunch was very tasty and I washed it down with another pot of tea and got back to work. I finished around 4.15pm as I had planned to meet Lucie, who had returned from the new Jungle Boss tour. I had a soda, a lime juice and some peanuts while I waited for Lucie to get ready. Her son, and Lucie’s mom also joined us and we all ate together, we should have ordered a bottle of wine as I had 3 by the glass. The Showstopper pizza was as good as always and we had a lovely evening.
Here’s my bill at The Villa’s restaurant for the whole day;
Bo Ne 170,000 2 pots of jasmine tea 100,000 Fresh orange 60,000 Soda water 25,000 Lime juice 30,000 Fresh prawn spring rolls 100,000 Peanuts 35,000 Showstopper pizza 240,000 3 glasses of wine 270,000 Total 1,030,000vnd Discount of 206,000vnd Total spent 824,000vnd (£27.19)
I cycled home and slept very well that night, having the bed to myself.
‘Once is a mistake, twice is a coincidence, three times is a pattern’ is one of those quotes you read on a friend’s Facebook status. On Thursday 15th June I thought of this quote when I foolishly ended up on another outing I’d not properly planned for! Captain Caveman had to be at work at 6pm for his Oxalis briefing so we had a last free day to have more Phong Nha fun. It was before 8am when I suggested that Captain Caveman and I go for a walk to the hidden lake and take a picnic, the forecast looked like it might be a bit cooler. I knew the way but, as we didn’t have a cooler bag, Captain Caveman suggested doing the walk then coming back to eat food and perhaps opening the champagne we bought at Chiang Mai airport. We got ready for a walk, the sun was shining but there were still some clouds. When we got downstairs, Bluey was there and I couldn’t walk too well so I suggested it would be quicker to cycle, especially as there is no shade whatsoever at the hidden lake. Of course we cycled the long way round and Captain Caveman seemed unsure of whether I would get us lost but I remembered the way. It was scenic, steamy hot and further than I’d remembered, plus Bluey seemed sluggish after the last 2 days of exertion.
Just as we had finished admiring the view and I set off back, Captain Caveman decided to cycle round the lake. It’s fenced off on the far side so I tried to call him back. He was having none of it and carried on, I couldn’t stand the heat and cycled towards the ‘road to nowhere’ hoping for shade. There was none and I was getting a bit moany! When Captain Caveman caught me up I was hangry so we called at the Winmart for some extra provisions and we planned to cycle back for a picnic brunch on the bed. Here’s what we bought;
Total spent 194,262vnd (£6.41) I was that hot that I didn’t realise how expensive those apples were – more than the last lot I bought.
I got a bit crotchety and needed a break so we stopped for a coconut at a roadside cafe by the river. It took me less than 30 seconds to polish it off and the cute dog came to check on me. Back home we enjoyed our picnic and a rest in the AC but we didn’t bother with the fizz as I was too dehydrated once again. I had double Oresol and did an hour of work while Captain Caveman packed for his tour tomorrow. He left at 5pm to go to Oxalis and I worked for a few hours.
At 8pm I met him and Tatas at The Villa’s restaurant where he and I had pizza and we all had red wine. We cycled home and I was actually looking forward to working from home tomorrow, I told Bluey she could have a well earned rest. We had cycled another 10km or more today so over 60km in 3 days – that was a first for me!
A question I often get asked is ‘Don’t you ever learn?’ Judging by my actions on Wednesday 14th June, I think it is fair to say that I don’t . Captain Caveman and I were up early to find that the weather was cloudy and the forecast predicted thunderstorms. I think I may have been over ambitious but I suggested another outing, it was Captain Caveman’s last full day off and I wanted us to make the most of it. I quickly took my measurements after my shower and was surprised that I didn’t ache much from my cycling 23km yesterday. I measured everything and here are the results; Bust -1cm, Waist -1cm, Hips +1cm. I suggested we should visit the Pub with Cold Beer as the owner had been following all my updates on Facebook since I left Vietnam, she’s a lovely woman and I’d missed her family and their place. Captain Caveman offered to drive the motorbike and, looking back, I should have agreed. I said we should cycle because Bluey would miss me when I’m back in Dalyan and it was cloudy. I drank rehydration tablets for my breakfast to keep from having any issues as I’d been getting a bit of cramp. As soon as we got out of the door I had to put on my sun hat as the sun came out! We pretty much did the same route as yesterday but I managed to cycle all the way to the Duck Stop without a break. When we got there Quynh, the owner, gave us a free drink and peanuts – I looked like a beetroot and was beginning to wish we’d gone by motorbike.
Captain Caveman hates it when I moan, in fact he says I complain a lot, so I had no choice but to soldier on. Even Bluey was having trouble and I had to push her up the hill from the Duck Stop until I could get back on for the downhill bit. I arrived at the Pub with Cold Beer in blazing sun, another drippy mess, any sun cream I’d had on had definitely sweated off. Nhat and her daughters were so pleased to see us, they got Captain Caveman a cold beer and me a water straight away. We decided to order chicken, pork, rice and morning glory because we hoped our friends, Chung and Uy, would join us. While Nhat killed a chicken and I rested in a hammock, Captain Caveman cycled up to the Wild Boar Farm to see Cuong. I couldn’t manage any more and was regretting cycling 13km away from home, not knowing if I’d be able to make it back.
Uy and Chung couldn’t make lunch but we arranged to meet tonight for dinner as it was their 6 year wedding anniversary. For lunch we had an absolute feast, including 2 bowls of the famous peanut sauce which we both love so much. Captain Caveman said it was only 10 minutes more to cycle to the Wild Boar Farm and wanted me to go after lunch but I decided another 10 minutes in the opposite direction would be foolish. Instead, I suggested we have a swim, seeing as there is a lovely swimming pool at the Pub with Cold Beer. I went to the toilet and, as I flushed, a frog jumped up from the bowl, I’d peed on it’s head and it wasn’t thrilled. I shouted Captain Caveman over to bring a camera as this wasn’t the first time I’d been startled by a frog in my toilet, in fact it was the third! (Once, while camping in India and the other while on Safari in Kenya). When it got to 3pm we decided we had better start making our way back, we had really enjoyed our time and food at the Pub with Cold Beer. We said our goodbyes and Captain Caveman and Bluey had already decided we would go the other way back, over a narrow, grid floor, suspension bridge which I was scared to cross. At first, Bluey was going to ride us across but I had to get off and push because I was having a panic on.
We cycled back through the valley and some of it was shaded which I was grateful for, some of it was steep and I had to push Bluey uphill. We soon ran out of water and I knew I wouldn’t make it back to Phong Nha in one go so Captain Caveman pushed Bluey for a bit and suggested a slight detour. Half an hour later, we were sat in Multi and Diem’s kitchen at the Pepper House being offered rice wine. I declined and had loads of much needed water while Captain Caveman had rice wine and beer (he’s an animal)! There were kids’ swimming lessons going on in the pool and I’m sure they were laughing at my red sweaty face. We finally left Multi’s to cycle home but I was a little tender on the undercarriage. Captain Caveman could tell I might not make it home so he suggested we cycle past where we used to live in Khuong Ha and stop off at a new place, he even got another video of me and Bluey.
Captain Caveman’s video of me and Bluey, in Khuong Ha
Phong Nha Funky Beach is a new venture owned by our friend, Mo (ex Oxalis colleague) and the previous owner of Greenfield Homestay. We arrived and sat overlooking the river on one of the platform style seating areas. It wasn’t particularly comfy for my achy legs but Mo was pleased to see us and was with another colleague of Captain Caveman’s, Nu, so they joined us. We had a cold beer, Mo brought us some vegan spring rolls and Nu gave us some vegan Banh Ep. Both were lovely but I was a bit distracted as it was already gone 5pm, it goes dark around 6pm and I hadn’t brought any lights. We said our goodbyes after a brief overview of the various activities that can be done there and set back off.
Our next stop was a quick nip in to Jungle Boss HQ, the boss was still not around to say hello to, but it was a good place for me to stop off to rest and use the toilet. We were due to meet Chung and Uy at 7pm but I was a sweaty mess and needed to go home for a shower. I’d drank all of the water we had between us so we had to stop for a coconut at Tree House Cafe on the way back home. I had a shower, then a naked lay on the bed in AC before rushing to get ready to go back out for dinner.
Captain Caveman and I met Chung at the Bia Hoi BBQ duck place, next door to Victory Road Villas. Uy was still on his was so we ordered the Bia Hoi beer which was about 60,000vnd (£1.98) for a small keg. Chung ordered food without Uy as it got to 8pm and he still wasn’t there yet but he arrived, a bit merry! It certainly was one of the more unusual anniversary celebrations I’d been on and turned out not to be much better than our own last year! Uy just drank and smoked but didn’t eat and another keg of cheap weak beer was consumed, mainly by the fellas. By the end of the meal, which tasted fantastic by the way, Uy was telling Chung she needed to do more exercise because she was fat. Luckily, the events of the last 2 days meant that Captain Caveman couldn’t possibly say the same about me today. Somehow, the birth of the LLC came out right there and then as Chung and I pledged to cycle together as the 2 founder members of the Lazy Ladies Club. The BBQ duck, veggies, noodles and beers came to a total of 400,000vnd (£13.20) which was a bargain.
We said our goodbyes and then instead of going home ourselves we had a sneaky bottle of red wine (also 400,000vnd) in The Villas to finish off our night. It was a good job, so that I could stop moaning that my bits were on fire from the 28km I’d managed to cycle on Bluey today on a very hot day! That was 3km more than yesterday, the furthest I cycled since before my injury and we did it in the height of summer. On the way home, I spotted a snake in the Stick or Snake game and it was alive in the Dead or Alive game, so I shouted to Captain Caveman behind me to stop so he could take a photo. It was heading back to the river after a spot of sunbathing and was slithering across the road, it was beautiful. I was glad to get in bed that night and at least we could have an easy, restful, quiet non-cycling day tomorrow, couldn’t we!?
The realisation that I had only 17 days left in Vietnam, hit me on Tuesday 13th June. Not all of them would be with Captain Caveman as he had to go back to work and I might even have less than 2 weeks left in Phong Nha. I felt like I needed to make more of an effort to enjoy it before I had to leave! I’m not sure whether it was the heat or just insanity but I started to have some very foolish ideas that I might come to regret. Captain Caveman was quite addicted to playing Bridge on his phone so, in an attempt to do something he would enjoy which did not involve being on his phone, I suggested something outdoorsy! Bluey, my bicycle, loves a trip out (even in the hot sun) and I decided we would cycle over to Greenfield Homestay. In fairness to Captain Caveman, he offered to drive Trigger, the motorbike, but then it would mean he couldn’t have a few beers so I said we would cycle. It was almost 11am when we got to Coffee Station and I was concerned if I ate anything I would get a dodgy stomach and not make the rest of the journey. Captain Caveman shovelled a bacon, egg and tomato sourdough sandwich down while I had a ginger tea. They used to do a lovely herbal tea but not any more so I sat and worried I’d bitten off more than I could chew with this cycle ride. On our way, we decided to call at Jungle Boss HQ, which was now relocated to Sy’s Homestay. We wanted to say Hi to my old boss, the owner, he was in the jungle so I only got to say hello to the marketing guys.
I managed to just about keep up with Captain Caveman for the rest of the journey but I arrived at Greenfields a sweaty mess. René and his wife gave us a nice welcome and Captain Caveman had a few beers. I got some delicious iced herbal tea and a big water then René treated us to some Toblerone. The place looked great and they had installed a big pool since I was last there, not that we went in it – we seem to have a habit of not swimming when there is a pool. After a couple of hours we decided to head off and I had the bright idea of cycling to East Hill for chicken, one of my favourite places in Phong Nha. Of course Captain Caveman knew a shortcut which involved cycling on grass and between buffalo, which I was a stranger to. I got a bit moany as it was a bit too far and hot but I made it in the end.
Captain Caveman ordered the chicken combo and we had a couple of drinks – they sell Strongbow cider and it’s very cheap in Phong Nha so I had those and Captain Caveman had beer. After an hour, there was still no chicken so Captain Caveman went to check, the girl hadn’t put the order through so we had to wait another 45 minutes. This was lucky as it meant we could invite Tatas who came after she finished work. The chicken was as delicious as it always was and worth the wait but then I had to cycle back.
I managed to get as far as The Villas so we stopped off for red wine and peanuts as a reward for cycling so far today. Back at home we were chatting about the route and how whizzy Bluey was. I was saying that I couldn’t believe I had managed to cycle a total of 23km in this heat when Captain Caveman fell asleep on me. I think I was going to hurt tomorrow and it was still over 30°C in the bedroom with AC on after 10pm!
Captain Caveman was due out of the cave on Friday 9th June so I had only scheduled myself to work in the morning. I had a sugar free plain yoghurt with a banana and an apple for my breakfast. I was starting to miss my Yorkshire tea and a nice bit of toast. I put a load of washing in and it would dry here very quickly but I noticed the white dress from Carol (of Dalyan’s Fat Club fame) had a mark on the pocket from where it had rubbed on the metal washing line. I worked from 8.30am to 3.30pm but with a long break for lunch. I ate my left over Indian food from last night and it was just as delicious. I didn’t need to reheat it as I left it on the bed for a bit to warm up. My sister got in touch and we spoke of plans for her forthcoming holiday to Dalyan, her and the family would arrive around the same time as me and my eldest niece really wanted to go horseriding. It looked like I might be about to agree to it but only if Gayle was going to do it too. Captain Caveman was back late afternoon and he had a couple of hours before he was getting picked up for his Gala Dinner. I arranged to meet Tatas again for more wine and we went to The Villas for dinner. I had one of my old favourites of confit duck leg on a bed of lentils, Tatas had a pasta dish with extra chillies and (there was a theme forming here) it still wasn’t spicy enough. It was my turn to buy the wine which was a reasonable 400,000vnd (£13.20) and the duck was 300,000vnd (£9.90). Captain Caveman joined us after he’d finished work, we had another drink, Tatas had a pho and then we cycled home. Tomorrow we had some exciting plans to go to Dong Hoi as Captain Caveman had some days off.
Wednesday 7th June was a much calmer day than yesterday. I was naturally up early with the sound of the lost Casio watch at 6.45am and it was measurements day. My bust had remained the same but I had lost 6cm from my waist and 3cm from my hips. I still didn’t have any scales so I wasn’t sure how much I’d had put on from our holiday. I decided to take myself off out for breakfast, seeing as I didn’t eat well yesterday. It was back to being hot and sunny again but it was early enough for me to cycle in to town to visit the supermarket. Phong Nha now has a Winmart and I was keen to get some ‘healthy’ provisions.
Here’s what I bought with the prices in Vietnamese Dong:
I’d completely forgotten how expensive apples are in Vietnam and should have bought bananas instead. I think 54p each for an apple may be a bit much but they turned out to be one of the nicest apples I’d had. At The Villas I had a mango smoothie and a beef noodle soup for breakfast. It came to 128,000vnd (£4.22) and was very nice. I was back home working on the laptop in the afternoon and had just a cereal bar, an apple and a KitKat for lunch. For dinner I had cheese with crackers and another KitKat – the KitKat diet was going well!
It was the 12th anniversary of Oxalis on Thursday 8th June so I was expecting there might be some sort of event either today or this weekend to celebrate. Captain Caveman and I had plans at the weekend but we would have to cancel them if there was an Oxalis party. So I was surprised when Tatas confirmed we would meet this evening for wine and then go for a curry. I asked her if there was any party planned but she said she’d not heard of anything. For breakfast I had a cereal bar, a yoghurt and an apple which meant I was back on the Slimming World plan. I worked from 9am until 3.45pm stopping for a lunch break at home of another cereal bar, 60g of cheese and 2 apples. I met Tatas at 7pm at Tree House for red wine and there was still no mention of an Oxalis anniversary party. However, one glass in to the bottle, she received a call to say there would be a bit of a do at Big Ben and could she come over after she had finished dinner. We drank the wine, which had to go in an ice bucket as it was still very hot at night here.
At Ganesh Indian restaurant I ordered chicken samosa for starter, then for main a chicken tikka with saffron rice and a garlic naan. Tatas, who likes everything extra spicy, ordered an extra hot chicken vindaloo with plain naan bread. We both had a couple of bottles of Saigon beer each. My food was amazing, even though my samosas looked like a pair of boobs and I’d brought my trusty Tupperware to take half home! Tatas was upset that her’s still wasn’t spicy enough despite it making me cry when I sniffed it! Here’s the prices of what we had so you can compare how much it costs where you are:
Towards the end of the meal, while I was still eating but Tatas had given up, the calls and messages from Tatas’ colleagues increased. By 9pm she had left me to go to Big Ben for the Oxalis anniversary party. I decided to chat to the staff at Ganesh and get some photos. When I left, one of the Indian guys came out to help me put my light on my bike as I had my hands full of tomorrow’s Indian takeaway! It was great to have an Indian restaurant back in Phong Nha and, although we missed Raj at Namaste, Ganesh was certainly one of my new favourites. I cycled home, popped my leftovers in the fridge and set my alarm for work tomorrow.
Of course we were up early on Monday 5th June and it was another hot day. The forecast said clouds but we could only dream of them. We didn’t have any breakfast and I walked round the house in my bikini all morning. Captain Caveman had his Oxalis briefing tonight so we decided to cycle in the hot sun to The Villas for lunch. Our efforts were unexpectedly rewarded when we arrived, as our Czech friend, Lucie, had left us a bottle of champagne as a gift. What a lovely treat that was and we decided to drink it with our pizzas. When Captain Caveman went to work I went home as Tatas had cancelled our meeting up for Margarita Monday due to work. I was also glad of a rest as I hadn’t fully recovered from the dehydration/hot bus fiasco yesterday. When Captain Caveman returned we looked at flights for my return to Turkey and found some interesting routes which may work out cost effective. I would research more while he was in the cave for 4 days.
Captain Caveman was off in to Hang Son Doong on the morning of Tuesday 6th June. He would be back on Friday afternoon then had 5 more days off. I was very pleased that he’d managed to get a schedule that allowed for this, especially as his supervisors were in England for a couple of months. I had planned a steady day of work and not much else but, as is my life, I was in for a bit of a spontaneous surprise later. Captain Caveman wanted to eat at the noodle cafe across the road for breakfast and I agreed to go with him. I seemed to recall that the last couple of times I’d been there, the food was very spicy. Captain Caveman said it wasn’t, so I was up for giving it another try. When the food came, it was fish with rice noodles and lots of chillies so I declined breakfast and gave mine to Sexy Quang. We bumped in to Vinh of Highway 20 Homestay and we had a chat, he was selling a wooden house and was also building a new homestay near a hidden lake in Phong Nha. He showed it to us on a map and I had no idea where it was but Captain Caveman thought he knew the location. Next, we walked home and picked up our bicycles for a ride to Oxalis. Captain Caveman had a couple of errands he needed to run in the office while I had a bowl of pho ga, chicken noodle soup!
After saying bye to Captain Caveman at Ho Khanh’s homestay, I had a look around and took some photos by the river. It looked like it was no longer being used as a cafe and the daughter, who used to run the place, was 1 week off giving birth to her second child. I didn’t see any homestay guests which was a shame as, before Covid, June was a busy month. Captain Caveman called me from the village on his tour to say a storm was coming and to batten down the hatches. I worked from 10.30am to 3.30pm, taking a lunch break to watch the heavy rain that we desperately needed. As it was too wet to venture out and I was enjoying being cooler, I just had cheese and crackers for lunch. Kat and Buu had invited me to join them on a dog walk with Muc (the dog the were looking after from Dong Hoi) at 5.30pm.
Video of the rain – it was needed and I even could put a fleece on in the AC but I didn’t turn it off
I cycled Bluey to Kat and Buu’s house, opposite Funny Monkeys, and parked her up. Luckily, the rain had not lasted long, although the road was still full of large puddles. Both Kat and Buu were wearing shorts and a top, Buu had shower shoes on so I made the assumption we weren’t walking too far and that the terrain would be easy. I couldn’t have been more wrong as we took a wrong turn in search of Vinh’s hidden lake. Halfway along we had to cross a stream with leeches in which was low on our side but a steep banking on the other. I had a dress and slippy trainers on, while carrying my overfull bag. At first I said I couldn’t cross but Kat and Buu insisted I could make it and helped me, with some dithering on my part. Next, we were walking through very wet rice paddies and trying not to get out feet wet, bit by leeches or (worse) find any unexploded bombs! We eventually got to the hidden lake, only to be met by Vinh on a motorbike pulling a trailer! There was a much easier route, obviously. We took that way on the way back and it was getting dark. Instead of drinks and dinner which normal people might be enjoying on a Tuesday evening at this time, I was drinking water and being laughed at by Buu’s landlord. Needless to say Muc, the dog, loved our adventure and shot off up the stairs for a nap. I cycled home, had a Snickers and some marshmallows for dinner, then did another couple of hours work!
Friday 2nd June was another busy and a pretty exciting day for us in Danang. After finishing work for the week, it was time for a spot of lunch. Captain Caveman had been to the shop on the corner and bought the following:
We called at the bus limo service office and Captain Caveman booked us our next trip which would be for tomorrow morning. We had a lovely lunch at Poomba’s Smokehouse where they have a great air conditioned room up a ladder style staircase. Captain Caveman had a Reuben’s sandwich, I had a slider trio and we both had beer. It was a ‘feels like’ temperature of 42°C outside, no breeze and high humidity so I was so grateful of the air con. On the way back to the hotel, we bought more stuff at the corner shop – 3 tubes of sensodyne toothpaste and 1.5l of water for 264,000vnd (£8.45). We had a bit of a rest in the AC at the hotel and then we got ready to go meet Caroline, she was back from Cambodia and it was about to get messy!
Captain Caveman had arranged for us to meet our friend, Caroline, at the Paradise Beach bar in Danang for sunset drinks. The traffic was bad but we had an over keen Grab driver who was determined to get us there without being concerned for anyone’s safety. We took a seat, not on the beach as I’m not keen on sand, then ordered cocktails while we waited for Caroline to get over from Hoi An. Service was pretty slow and it appeared that there was only one bar tender making cocktails but numerous other staff milling about. I realised I had mistakenly left the hotel wearing the shower flipflops, which didn’t really set off Carol’s (from Fat Club) dress too well. Caroline arrived and we had far too many frozen margaritas for us and long island iced teas for Captain Caveman while we caught up on what’s been going on.
At 8.30pm we had a table booked at Le Comptoir, a really lovely french restaurant and I insisted we ate inside in the AC as it was still boiling hot. We decided to have the Tasting menu with wine pairing as well as extra oysters for Captain Caveman and Caroline. We started off well but by the main course it was carnage; Caroline and I had an extra red wine while Captain Caveman lagged behind, when the main course came those two had disappeared and I had to ask for their food to be kept warm while I tucked in to mine. I ended up having 2 of the puddings and yet more wine before we staggered out in search of the nearest cocktail bar.
At the Craftsman I remembered having a lychee martini, Captain Caveman was wasted and Caroline wasn’t much better. We also were hoping to see our Phong Nha friend, Smiley Fox, who worked here but he wasn’t there. He messaged back to say he was actually in Phong Nha! We all went off in our Grab taxis very much worse for wear but having had an amazing night. I was not looking forward to the early alarm tomorrow and I suspected Captain Caveman may be slightly less enthusiastic about our arrangements than he usually would have been.
Photo credit – some photos by Caroline and Captain Caveman
I had planned to work my last 3 hours of the week on Thursday 1st June, however, it made sense to finish them tomorrow. Instead, we had breakfast at the Silkian Hotel then got ready and packed to check out before noon. We had an expensive day ahead of us as we were heading over to Danang for a couple of nights. But first I was off shopping at one of the best swimwear places in Hoi An. During Covid lockdown, Mommy Shark had helped me out with getting some swimmers and shorts sent up to me in Phong Nha (without having been in the shop) and they had fit. Now we were actually going to the shop which was a bit tricky to find but did have AC and a fan. Na and her mom greeted us and welcomed us in to the overstocked shop. I explained what I was looking for, she plonked Captain Caveman down on a seat with a fan and then started to sift through piles of items for me to try on. I tried a lot of bikinis and shorts on, some of which looked good, others that didn’t suit me or Captain Caveman didn’t like. We both loved the cycling shorts with hidden pockets in though and their matching bra tops.
Here’s what I bought at Mommy Shark and the prices in Vietnamese Dong: 1 red & white bikini 350,000 1 floral bikini 450,000 1 zebra print bikini 680,000 1 black bikini shorts 220,000 3 cycling shorts 750,000 2 sports bra tops 600,000 Total spent 3,050vnd (£97.60)
I wasn’t planning on buying so much but after losing weight, there was so much more stuff that fitted me and it’s better to get it when you can. I thought the prices were extremely good value too. We said our goodbyes and called a grab to head to the Meliora Hotel in Danang. We were a bit early for check in so the receptionist gave us a bottle of water and we sat in reception to wait, it was melting hot outside. Once in the room we made use of the washing machine and I got my Mommy Shark purchases out. We had to hurry along though as we had places to be and people to meet, as is usual.
After drinking 2 cold beers, which I’d got from the shop next door for 11,818vnd (38p) each and waiting for the washing to finish, Captain Caveman and I decided to visit an old favourite restaurant. The Nomad Kitchen, which was within walking distance from our hotel, had changed premises and no longer had AC. It did have a roof top with a bit of breeze and some fans so we went up there. We each ordered a glass of wine, I fancied the chicken salad as I had bikinis to look good in, Captain Caveman ordered pasta. The food was great, more wine was had (we should have ordered a bottle) and then his friend and former colleague came to meet us. Katie, her husband Sasha and her little baby, Sam, are really lovely and we spent a couple of hours with them chatting. We had a complimentary cheese cake, said hello to the owner and our friends shared a generous portion of fish and chips which looked great. I forgot to take a note of the bill as Captain Caveman paid online.
In the evening, I collected my new glasses from the opticians while slightly squiffy and was convinced I couldn’t see as well as before. The optician suggested I wear them and check again tomorrow. Captain Caveman treated us both to a fantastic meal at another one of our favourite restaurants, Olivia’s Steakhouse. Here’s what we had and the prices;
1 pepper sauce 65,000 1 750ml still water 70,000 1 grilled sweetcorn 100,000 1 macaroni cheese 120,000 1 grilled asparagus 145,000 1 bottle red wine 950,000 2 250g fillet steaks 2,400,000 5% service charge 196,000 Total spent 4,116,000vnd (£131.71)
This was probably the most expensive meal we’d had in Vietnam so far but it really was worth it. We were served complimentary bread and dips, which Captain Caveman asked for seconds of and we weren’t charged for. We also got 3 shots of complimentary chocolate vodka each for our dessert. Olivia’s has been one of our favourites for a while and the new venue was a winner. We also felt really lucky to have been able to go as Captain Caveman had only just got confirmation that he didn’t have to go back to work earlier than expected. We were back at the hotel by 9pm as I wanted to be up early for work tomorrow.
Wednesday 31st May was another busy day in Hoi An; I worked from 6.45-8.15am, before breakfast. It was weigh day but I had no scales so I just took my measurements. My bust was the same, my waist had increased by 6cm and my hips by 3cm – not a good result, but hardly surprising. Captain Caveman and I ate in the Silkian Hotel for breakfast and it was ok but nothing special. I went back to work for another 2.5 hours while Captain Caveman had gone out looking at phones. I got a grab taxi to meet him for lunch at Baba’s Kitchen, the Indian restaurant. We both ordered the masala dosa but, when it came, mine had chillies in. I didn’t realise until it was too late and I’d already eaten quite a bit and had to have a cheeky lunchtime beer to help take the burn off. I got a taxi back to the hotel, I left Captain Caveman to his own devices and managed a whole hour of work before I became ill. My stomach swelled so much that it looked like I had swallowed a football or was about to give birth and I spent far too long in the bathroom. I measured my waist again to find it was 24cm bigger than when I was in Dalyan and 15cm bigger than before I ate chillies a couple of hours ago! I also had very swollen cankles! I was worried I wasn’t going to make it out tonight, as arranged, to meet 2 of our lovely friends.
Not being one to miss a night out and, after a very short rest, antihistamines and Maalox, I was ready to go out out. Looking and feeling like I was pregnant, I went to meet Captain Caveman. He was already with our friends, Steve and June, at Market Bar and I managed to navigate a Grab taxi to find the bar. It was a lovely place with 2 for 1 on gins so I had two with cucumber and two with cocoa nibs (as you do). It was great to see our friends to catch up after 11 months of not seeing them. They took us to a lovely French restaurant, Le Petit Bistro, in Hoi An, which their friend owns and it was an absolute delight. June and I ordered the rum punch and we tried some nibbles courtesy of the chef. The staff were lovely and we all ordered main meals, I had wine, the men had beer and June was on the water. My beef stew was gorgeous and not particularly diet friendly. By 9.30pm it was home time, back to the Silkian Hotel for our last night. Tomorrow we had more exciting plans!
Tuesday 30th May was jam-packed with activity and a bit of drama! We left the Deluxe Boutique Hotel by pre-booked taxi, just as the sun was rising. Our flight with Air Asia was at 7.25am from Chiang Mai to Danang, we were off back to Vietnam with my 30 day visa. At the airport we didn’t get any breakfast or a drink but instead we spent 970 of the 1,000 Thai Baht hotel deposit on Duty Free. I chose a bottle a bottle of Prosecco and a bottle of Hardy’s red wine which came to £21.55. Our luggage allowance on the flight was only 7kg so Captain Caveman had taken most of the fresh laundry in his bag as I think mine weighed heavier because of my lap top. We landed in Danang around 10am and went to the official taxi queue where the man with the lanyard walked us over to a car and driver. The car was not an My Linh or a Vina Sun taxi, it didn’t have a yellow plate and there was something odd about the chubby taxi driver with foreign arm tattoos. We got to the opticians where I had an appointment at 11am but we were early, when we asked how much to the driver. He tried to more than double the fare and wouldn’t let us out. Captain Caveman told him the money was in the bag in the boot so he let him out while I was winding the window down to try to let myself out but it was locked. Captain Caveman gave the driver half of what he asked for but then he got aggressive, telling him to get back in the car. I took photos so that we could (yet again) report it to the airport authorities and Captain Caveman told him to F off. Once in the opticians we were a bit wound up and this was not the first time for it to happen to me. It was concerning as this could be a reason tourists would not return to Vietnam. Captain Caveman said he would report it and I sent him the photo evidence, which I luckily got. I had my eye test appointment and decided on transitional lenses in my new glasses to save swapping normal glasses to sunglasses all the time. I had all the protective/glare stuff on and finally picked some lightweight transitional specs to the total tune of 3,660,000vnd (£117.12) – so much cheaper than in the UK.
Our next stop was a taxi ride to Hoi An for us to check in at the Silkian Hotel, we used Grab to be safer. Captain Caveman had picked it because it was new, had a good price and was close to Caroline’s cafe. Unfortunately, Caroline had took off on an impromptu trip to Cambodia so we didn’t know if we would get to see her this trip. The hotel was nice, the staff friendly and our room was lovely. We dumped our stuff and popped to 9 Grains (Caroline’s cafe) for our lunch because we’d had no breakfast. We both had juices, hot drinks and bacon sandwiches all of which were great and I spotted, and bought, the last bar of ‘my’ particular soap which is made from coconut and helps my eczema. I worked from 1.30-6.30pm with super whizzy free internet at the hotel room, while Captain Caveman entertained himself and booked a table for dinner.
The Slimming World diet had not been going well of late but I really did push the boat out at Le Cabanon, one of my favourite restaurants in Hoi An. We ate baked camembert with rosemary and honey, a Cochonne pizza to share, drank 2 bottles of Viognier wine and thoroughly enjoyed it.
Our bill was as follows: Camembert 360,000 Pizza 170,000 2 bottles of wine 1,360,000 Total spent 1,890,000vnd (£60.48)
There was an offer on for wine and pizza so our actual bill was less than this in the end. It was so hot in there and the waiter was absolutely fantastic as it was very busy so Captain Caveman did leave a tip.
We decided to have a little walk to find a bar Captain Caveman had been recommended, called Mescal. I was so impressed when we walked in as the building is amazing and it’s hard to find. Captain Caveman had an Old Fashioned while I went completely mad and ordered a trio of tequilas with a watermelon sangria. For 240,000vnd (£7.68) it was definitely up there with the most memorable drink choice I’ve ever had the pleasure of. It took me ages to drink it so Captain Caveman had a second Old Fashioned which were 250,000vnd (£8) each. I don’t recall getting back to the hotel that night!
Our last day in Chiang Mai fell on Monday 29th May and I had scheduled in to get some work done. This meant that I would still have plenty of play time at our next holiday destination this week. It had been a bit touch and go as to whether Captain Caveman would have to go back early to be the cave expert of an extra trip this coming week but so far, so good. We had another, and final, trip to SP Chicken for breakfast which we did not regret – it is definitely one of the best restaurants we’ve ever eaten at. I took a couple of temple photos just to show willing but it was too hot to be bothered to visit any. Captain Caveman and I had toyed with the idea of doing an Elephant Sanctuary visit while in Chiang Mai but I was dubious, especially after Covid, if they were really as legit and respectful to the animals as portrayed. Captain Caveman decided to take himself off to the barbers while I headed back to the hotel to start work. I’d not walked back to Deluxe Boutique Hotel alone before so I had directions from Captain Caveman and no working phone between us. Luckily, Spiderman and an inappropriately named hostel helped me remember the way back. By the time I started work there was heavy rain so I ploughed through from 11.30am to 6pm without a break. When I finished work, Captain Caveman was back and it was his turn to decide a location for dinner. We had wine and pizzas at the By Hand Cafe – an Artisan Pizza Lounge. They were really good, the service was good and we both liked the place, so much so that we came back later after a couple of cheeky martinis at the House of Ginger. We probably shouldn’t have drank so much, given that we were due for checking in for our flight back to Vietnam at 6am tomorrow morning.
Wednesday 24th May was another lovely day in Sapa, which started with me getting weighed and doing my measurements. Even though I was on holiday and knew I’d be veering off the Slimming World diet, it was important for me to still keep track. Miraculously, the scales showed I was 1.3kg lighter than when I got weighed 2 weeks ago on Steve and Michelle’s scales but, obviously, they weren’t Carol’s scales so we didn’t know if either of them were accurate. My measurements showed that I’d put 3cm on my bust but lost 1cm off my waist and hips. I thought I’d log on to the work system early so that I’d be free when Captain Caveman returned this afternoon. Unfortunately, the system wasn’t working and I couldn’t access anything. I sent an email to my boss but it was 4am where he was, and 2am in the UK, so nothing would be done until office hours started. I went for the hotel breakfast and it was so good, on the way back I took photos as there were mysterious clouds around the hotel – someone had stolen the mountain view. After breakfast I kept checking the system to see if I could do any work but I couldn’t. Over the next 4 hours I kept checking as I didn’t want to be working in the afternoon but I had no luck. My boss was grateful for the alert despite no output and told me I didn’t have to work for the rest of the week so that we could enjoy our holiday together instead. Captain Caveman returned having had a marvellous time shimmying up and down the mountain but needed a shower. He got weighed on the scales and was the same as he usually was so I assumed my weight was correct.
Photo credit – Captain Caveman for the Ngu Chi Son trek photos
We decided to spend the afternoon making use of the hotel facilities. We were the only ones in the swimming pool and it was lovely to have a swim for the second time on my trip, and since I left Turkey. I loved swimming in that pool but we soon got a bit thirsty and peckish so decided to head to the Cat Cat cafe bar.
Photo credit Captain Caveman
Captain Caveman had an Espresso Martini and I had a Margarita, both were good. The place was so beautiful and it was nice to see Captain Caveman relaxing but not playing bridge on his phone, for a change. We booked the free shuttle to take us in to Sapa town at 6pm so we went back to get ready, I was going to wear my new dress!
We had a fantastic time out in Sapa that evening. Captain Caveman took photos of me in my new dress from Rico, which I really liked. I took a video of the ride on the free shuttle bus in to town, trying to show how steep the streets are in Sapa. We had a bit of a wander round before deciding to eat at O Quy Ho, another recommendation from Hoa. We went upstairs where there was a nice view over the town and we ordered beers. We ordered a mixture of food to share; spring rolls, chicken and some pork which were all very tasty.
After dinner we decided to carry on our night with cocktails at Saparis. Captain Caveman had long island iced tea and I had a margarita, both were good. We had a walk back in to town where we waited for our shuttle bus back to the hotel. We made it back in time to have a nightcap in the bar at Cat Cat cafe, however, when we got there it had already closed early. We went back to the room and ordered room service which was funny. Two members of staff came to the room with a wine list to ask us which we wanted when we had already ordered the house red. The wine arrived with the two members of staff again and the main guy came in to open and pour it. We had some smoked stringy cheese to go with our wine to end a really lovely day.
Foolishly, I’d hoped for quality time and extra snoozes on Sunday 21st May but, obviously, Captain Caveman had other ideas. As he had promised me a shopping trip, we had to get up early to get it done. I’m sure he gave a good reason why and it could’ve been due to the weather but I was too tired to note it. By 7.30am we were showered, dressed and in the hotel dining room tucking in to a shared fruit plate. We both had the chicken noodle soup (pho ga) and a hot drink before Captain Caveman insisted we look lively for today’s mission. At 8am it was already 31°C with a ‘feels like’ 39°C and the air quality was not good in the capital city. Just a couple of weeks ago, Hanoi had suffered a heatwave with the highest temperatures ever recorded. We got a Grab taxi, which are really cheap in Hanoi, to the shopping centre to find we had to wait for it to open. Once inside, we headed straight for Uniqlo where I’d been online to check the choices and had taken screenshots of a few items I liked the look of. It didn’t quite pan out as well as expected because the largest they had in stock for almost everything was an L (about a size 12). Captain Caveman helped me pick out a few practical items and I headed to the Fitting room a little too optimistic. I hate shopping anyway so I did get a little despondent when the first couple of things didn’t fit. I had to remind myself that this time last year I wouldn’t have even got in the XL (size 14 approx) if they had any. In less than an hour I had managed to spend 3,194,00vnd (£108.60) of Captain Caveman’s hard earned cash on 6 items and I was happy to have 2 pairs of skorts, which I’d never had before! We dropped my wares off at the hotel and I had a little fashion show with my new clothes while Captain Caveman took terrible photos of me in them, from the position of him laying on the bed. I’d not even been here quite a week and he was getting bored of taking photos on demand.
Our next stop was to meet two Phong Nha friends for lunch; Leonard, the old guy who stayed at Funny Monkeys from before the pandemic, now lives in Hanoi, and our good friend Kat, who divides her time between Hanoi and Phong Nha. Both were available on the same day so Leonard had chosen one of his nearby favourite restaurants, Pizza 4 Ps. Captain Caveman and I were the first to arrive and we decided to order a cider that came with some cheese as a pre starter! Leonard was the next to arrive with his arm strapped up after breaking his collar bone in a fall. Other than that he was on good form and it was great to see him. Kat arrived next and was only able to stay for an hour due to her having an upcoming painful dentist appointment. We were having such a good catch up that I almost forgot to take some photos and I had a weird incident in the toilets with the cleaner who wanted me to rate the toilets, on an electronic board, as ‘needing improvement ‘ and then comment on why. The toilets were fine, so I wasn’t quite sure what she was getting at but Leonard said a similar thing happened to him. The half and half pizza which I shared with Captain Caveman was fantastic, the salad was a bit too drenched in balsamic vinegar for me but I managed to get it down me with another cider (no cheese).
After lunch and walking Leonard back to his hotel, Captain Caveman and I walked to the gold shop to exchange some foreign currency and it was so hot that I was getting a bit moany. We had to make a refreshment stop at Puku cafe where, to my delight, they had the iced slushy drinks with passion fruit at 80,000vnd (£2.72) each. Just as I thought we were off back for a siesta or a rest, Captain Caveman announced we were meeting Lien, our old Vietnamese teacher and friend. We got a Grab taxi to Oliberry cafe where Lien was already waiting. We got chatting about clothes shopping and Lien recommended a woman’s independent clothes shop nearby called Rico Clothing. Within minutes, I was on the back of Lien’s Honda Cub heading to Rico, where I picked out a few dresses to try on. Captain Caveman walked it there and caught us up to give his opinion on the clothes I tried on. I bought a lovely dress and even tried a Size L which was too big for me, I also found a couple of pairs of knickers that fit me too. We said our goodbyes and I hoped we’d be going home to freshen up and get ready for our dinner date tonight – no, we were out out. Captain Caveman and I had arranged to meet Johan, a friend through caving and Andrea, for tapas with a bit of a difference at Pinchos. We were a little early so we called in to 7 Bridges for a pint of ale, as you do.
At Pincho’s we shared sparkling water and red wine but we didn’t go mad as Johan was on a strict regime and would be up early for boxing class before work tomorrow. Pincho’s was easily one of the best meals I’ve had and it was amazing to be able to eat so much meat and cheese. We tried quite a lot of the different tapas dishes and I only got a surprise chilli the once, luckily I could smell it. We were back to the Aquarius Grand Hotel by 9.30pm and were already setting our alarms for another very early get up. Our day had been an amazing one and when I got in I had to try my new dress on, which I liked more the second try on. The hotel room had cost 765,000vnd (£26) per night and well worth that price, which included breakfast. Captain Caveman paid our bill which also included the 400,000vnd car pick up service (£13.60) from Hanoi airport to the hotel. We also paid in advance for 2 bus tickets at 480,000vnd (£16.32) each as we were off to our next destination for 4 nights at 6.30am tomorrow!
I was so hot that I couldn’t sleep and was still awake at 1.40am on Friday 19th May. I got up and drank a lot of water with Oresol in, to keep hydrated. At 3.15am I was checking out prices of my return flights with Scoot and they were quite pricey. I had about 6 weeks left until I was due to go back and I wasn’t quite sure how I would survive this heat. I also remembered I was meant to have applied for my next visa as I was only allowed to stay in Vietnam on the 15 day exemption until 28th May. I dozed off around 3.40am and woke up with the loud speaker at 6am, which was irritating. Of course Captain Caveman’s lost watch went off at 6.45am then I went back to sleep, despite the room being a bit warm already. I’d arranged to meet Veronika at VRV for lunch at noon, so I got myself ready for a cycle in red hot sun. I borrowed Captain Caveman’s trousers and a T-shirt to protect me from the 38°C sun and I took a dress to change in to. I have Factor 50 sun cream with me but I find it runs off quite easily. Veronika had been looking after her eldest grandson for a whole month, while Ben and Bich were in Australia. She was eager to get out and celebrate her freedom as they were back in Phong Nha now. When she arrived she had a bottle of our favourite fizz in the fridge and she asked for it with an ice bucket and 3 glasses. Another lady, Jenny, was joining us and we decided to order lunch too. I had the courgette salad, Veronika had the duck and Jenny had a pho. All of the food was good and we were having a lovely lunch when a customer started chatting to us. It turned out that the customer and her lively young son knew the Wiringi family and had come here on Melissa’s recommendation. Captain Caveman arrived back from his Son Doong tour and came to join us around 3pm at The Villa’s restaurant before he had to go to his Gala Dinner at 5.30pm. He was a bit cross with me that I’d still not got round to applying for my 30 day visa so he did it for me, he also brought me a backlight for my cycling home in the dark. Veronika had booked to stay the night at VRV so she went for a Nannan nap, Jenny went for a swim and I started work. I only had 2 hours left to work this week so planned to work 4-6pm and today I was working on something new. At 6pm, Veronika came back to join me, as well as Tatas, Jenny had returned to the Farmstay. I decided to be naughty and ordered my favourite Villa’s pizza, the Showstopper. It had salami, blue cheese, fig jam and spring onion on and is not in the least bit Slimming World friendly. It was delicious and we had a great night. Captain Caveman rejoined us after he’d finished work. I had some work queries and corrections which needed finishing so I had to do another hour’s work from 8.30-9.30pm so that the task wasn’t left until Monday. This meant I would only work 15 hours next week which was fortunate as Captain Caveman now had at least 2 weeks off, with a possibility of it being 17 days holiday. This was great news, as he had been working a lot recently and he really was ready for a break. He’d also planned a really great holiday for the two of us, including a trip to Thailand, starting from tomorrow!
My bill for today’s food and drink at The Villa’s restaurant was as follows:
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