Phong Nha – 14th June

A question I often get asked is ‘Don’t you ever learn?’ Judging by my actions on Wednesday 14th June, I think it is fair to say that I don’t . Captain Caveman and I were up early to find that the weather was cloudy and the forecast predicted thunderstorms. I think I may have been over ambitious but I suggested another outing, it was Captain Caveman’s last full day off and I wanted us to make the most of it.
I quickly took my measurements after my shower and was surprised that I didn’t ache much from my cycling 23km yesterday. I measured everything and here are the results;
Bust -1cm,
Waist -1cm,
Hips +1cm.
I suggested we should visit the Pub with Cold Beer as the owner had been following all my updates on Facebook since I left Vietnam, she’s a lovely woman and I’d missed her family and their place. Captain Caveman offered to drive the motorbike and, looking back, I should have agreed. I said we should cycle because Bluey would miss me when I’m back in Dalyan and it was cloudy. I drank rehydration tablets for my breakfast to keep from having any issues as I’d been getting a bit of cramp.
As soon as we got out of the door I had to put on my sun hat as the sun came out! We pretty much did the same route as yesterday but I managed to cycle all the way to the Duck Stop without a break. When we got there Quynh, the owner, gave us a free drink and peanuts – I looked like a beetroot and was beginning to wish we’d gone by motorbike.

Captain Caveman hates it when I moan, in fact he says I complain a lot, so I had no choice but to soldier on. Even Bluey was having trouble and I had to push her up the hill from the Duck Stop until I could get back on for the downhill bit.
I arrived at the Pub with Cold Beer in blazing sun, another drippy mess, any sun cream I’d had on had definitely sweated off. Nhat and her daughters were so pleased to see us, they got Captain Caveman a cold beer and me a water straight away. We decided to order chicken, pork, rice and morning glory because we hoped our friends, Chung and Uy, would join us. While Nhat killed a chicken and I rested in a hammock, Captain Caveman cycled up to the Wild Boar Farm to see Cuong. I couldn’t manage any more and was regretting cycling 13km away from home, not knowing if I’d be able to make it back.

Uy and Chung couldn’t make lunch but we arranged to meet tonight for dinner as it was their 6 year wedding anniversary.
For lunch we had an absolute feast, including 2 bowls of the famous peanut sauce which we both love so much. Captain Caveman said it was only 10 minutes more to cycle to the Wild Boar Farm and wanted me to go after lunch but I decided another 10 minutes in the opposite direction would be foolish. Instead, I suggested we have a swim, seeing as there is a lovely swimming pool at the Pub with Cold Beer. I went to the toilet and, as I flushed, a frog jumped up from the bowl, I’d peed on it’s head and it wasn’t thrilled. I shouted Captain Caveman over to bring a camera as this wasn’t the first time I’d been startled by a frog in my toilet, in fact it was the third! (Once, while camping in India and the other while on Safari in Kenya).
When it got to 3pm we decided we had better start making our way back, we had really enjoyed our time and food at the Pub with Cold Beer. We said our goodbyes and Captain Caveman and Bluey had already decided we would go the other way back, over a narrow, grid floor, suspension bridge which I was scared to cross. At first, Bluey was going to ride us across but I had to get off and push because I was having a panic on.

We cycled back through the valley and some of it was shaded which I was grateful for, some of it was steep and I had to push Bluey uphill. We soon ran out of water and I knew I wouldn’t make it back to Phong Nha in one go so Captain Caveman pushed Bluey for a bit and suggested a slight detour. Half an hour later, we were sat in Multi and Diem’s kitchen at the Pepper House being offered rice wine. I declined and had loads of much needed water while Captain Caveman had rice wine and beer (he’s an animal)! There were kids’ swimming lessons going on in the pool and I’m sure they were laughing at my red sweaty face.
We finally left Multi’s to cycle home but I was a little tender on the undercarriage. Captain Caveman could tell I might not make it home so he suggested we cycle past where we used to live in Khuong Ha and stop off at a new place, he even got another video of me and Bluey.

Phong Nha Funky Beach is a new venture owned by our friend, Mo (ex Oxalis colleague) and the previous owner of Greenfield Homestay. We arrived and sat overlooking the river on one of the platform style seating areas. It wasn’t particularly comfy for my achy legs but Mo was pleased to see us and was with another colleague of Captain Caveman’s, Nu, so they joined us. We had a cold beer, Mo brought us some vegan spring rolls and Nu gave us some vegan Banh Ep. Both were lovely but I was a bit distracted as it was already gone 5pm, it goes dark around 6pm and I hadn’t brought any lights. We said our goodbyes after a brief overview of the various activities that can be done there and set back off.

Our next stop was a quick nip in to Jungle Boss HQ, the boss was still not around to say hello to, but it was a good place for me to stop off to rest and use the toilet.
We were due to meet Chung and Uy at 7pm but I was a sweaty mess and needed to go home for a shower. I’d drank all of the water we had between us so we had to stop for a coconut at Tree House Cafe on the way back home. I had a shower, then a naked lay on the bed in AC before rushing to get ready to go back out for dinner.

Captain Caveman and I met Chung at the Bia Hoi BBQ duck place, next door to Victory Road Villas. Uy was still on his was so we ordered the Bia Hoi beer which was about 60,000vnd (£1.98) for a small keg. Chung ordered food without Uy as it got to 8pm and he still wasn’t there yet but he arrived, a bit merry! It certainly was one of the more unusual anniversary celebrations I’d been on and turned out not to be much better than our own last year!
Uy just drank and smoked but didn’t eat and another keg of cheap weak beer was consumed, mainly by the fellas. By the end of the meal, which tasted fantastic by the way, Uy was telling Chung she needed to do more exercise because she was fat. Luckily, the events of the last 2 days meant that Captain Caveman couldn’t possibly say the same about me today. Somehow, the birth of the LLC came out right there and then as Chung and I pledged to cycle together as the 2 founder members of the Lazy Ladies Club.
The BBQ duck, veggies, noodles and beers came to a total of 400,000vnd (£13.20) which was a bargain.

We said our goodbyes and then instead of going home ourselves we had a sneaky bottle of red wine (also 400,000vnd) in The Villas to finish off our night. It was a good job, so that I could stop moaning that my bits were on fire from the 28km I’d managed to cycle on Bluey today on a very hot day! That was 3km more than yesterday, the furthest I cycled since before my injury and we did it in the height of summer. On the way home, I spotted a snake in the Stick or Snake game and it was alive in the Dead or Alive game, so I shouted to Captain Caveman behind me to stop so he could take a photo. It was heading back to the river after a spot of sunbathing and was slithering across the road, it was beautiful.
I was glad to get in bed that night and at least we could have an easy, restful, quiet non-cycling day tomorrow, couldn’t we!?

Photo credit – some photos are by